I have some really good friends in town that are really good players. Some are ex-major recording artists and some are in the Air Force Bands and some are just bad a**es. I was thinking about asking some of them to evaluate me as a player. We all gig at this little place in town, and I've gigged with all of them in separate projects before, so they know me as a player and they have performances to evaluate.

But I was wondering if this was alright to do. Does it seem self centered or like I would be begging for compliments? I don't really know where I'm at in my playing. I'm not close to them but I'm not terrible either. I guess I would really just want them to comment on the areas they think I can improve.

I don't know, for some reason it just seems like it would be weird for me to ask any of them. I love helping the younger guys that look up to me, I offer advice all the time. It just seems like the older guys are over it and wouldn't care too much for something like that.

One of my favorite stories in the whole world - buddy of mine is a great jazz guitarist but, living (at the time) in Augusta GA he was (especially after I moved up here) at the mercy of whatever hacks could get a gig and hire him. He has what amounts to a house gig every Sunday night at the local jazz hive with a tenor "owner"; nice enough guy, but doesn't really put the time in, still reads SATIN DOLL fer cryin out loud. Anyway, my buddy Matt records alla the gigs and after the hit, when he goes home, he listens to the PREVIOUS week's gig. The tenor/leader gets wind of this and asks if he can fall by and check it out, so Matt says Cool.
They hang and listen (and imbibe refreshment) and finally T/L says "Man you know I really respect your playing, I was hoping you could tell me what you think of my playing". So Matt (still wanting to maintain a working relationship with this cat) says" Well it sounds like you are more of a melodic than a harmonic player, so if that's the kind of thing you are chasing, HERE'S some cats to check out who are doing the same sort of thing and HERE'S some stuff to work on." They continue listening for awhile and then T/L pipes up again, "You really have been playing jazz a lot longer than me and I can respect that, what do you think of my playing?" So Matt thinks to himself, Well we HAVE been having a pretty good time tonight both at and after the gig. Maybe he just doesn't remember talking about this earlier. And says "Well you sound like a more linear player than a vertical one, you should check out THESE CATS and transcribe some of their stuff, see what they're doing, if that's the way you want to go. HERE'S some stuff I worked on when I was trying to get my playing together." And they contnue listening.

About 10 minutes later, sure enough, T/L just has to ask " You're such a solid jazz player, what do you think of my playing?" At that point Matt had pretty much figured out what was up and said " Man you sound great."

And that was the last time the cat asked.

MORAL OF THE STORY - some folks are really into music and want to hear every little thing that is going to give them a deeper understanding, a clearer understanding of HOW TO MAKE MUSIC. These people want to hear not only The Truth about how they sound, they want to hear what they need to work on to get deeper, who they should check out, how they can practice, WHAT they practice, where to go, who to play with, etc. ANYTHING that will help them be a better musician.

And then you have cats who just want to hear that they sound great.

So I don't think that, if you come off as the former rather than the latter in the MORAL, any of the cats are going to be "over it". Every time ANYBODY who played the music I was interested in came through my little East Bumf**k town in Georgia, I got them to talk to me in whatever capacity - can I get a lesson, what should I work on, what did you work on, what should I listen to, who should I listen to etc etc etc . Every single one of those cats was responsive and helpful.

Edit: how about this ^ for a proper response, you´re a lucky guy Mr. OP

I you ask properly and speak your mind clearly, there should be no problems...i would like to do that too, a good friend should tell you the truth about the good and specially the bad elements in your playing, and if that friend is a Pro...you´re golden.

I think they will be very please you asked them. although don't ask them so that you can get a pat on the back. if you are serious you will want them to tell you your shortcomings and how to fix them. otherwise it will be a waste of time.

Frankly, I prefer recording myself. I am always gonna be more critical of my playing than anyone else.

Which is cool, maintaining as objective an assessment of your playing is a great thing. The thing about talking to others is that they hear you without knowing what's easy for you or what's hard, what you've put a lot of time into and what you haven't addressed. They just hear you.

Plus they have a knowledge base (hopefully) that is different than yours. You may listen to yourself and say "gee I'm not really making that 16th note syncopated line", it's gonna be somebody (with the necessary skill sets) watching and listening to you play that will say" you know everytime you make a string crossing you have to start over with your first finger, that's really hanging you up. Here's what I did to work on that."


And over and above talking to other musicians, sitting in the same room with a teacher is a great way to progress as a musician....

I would hate it if I ask for some comments and got some sarcastic answers. It would feel the same as getting rejected by a girl. The guitarist in my previous band was alot more experienced than me and even when I knew I played bad that day, he would never tell me the truth but give some kind of sarcastic answer. For me I would never ask someone for their opinion voluntarily unless it was my teacher. Guess I'm more afraid of getting hurt more than anything. I need more confidence..

Btw what does "vertical" and "horizontal" players mean?

I got them to talk to me in whatever capacity - can I get a lesson, what should I work on, what did you work on, what should I listen to, who should I listen to etc etc etc .

This is what I'm going for. I've had such a hard time practicing objectively lately. I'm just looking for them to recommend one tiny little thing that I wasn't aware of that will give me something else to work on.

All the players are definitely wayyyyy good. They're all in the Air Force band and one used to play behind a couple huge acts. I've taken "lessons" from the bass player. Though when I asked him for lessons he just said.... "We'll have some beers and jam a little. See what we can figure out." And the previous player had the same exact response when I asked him. It's not a personal matter either, because we hang frequently and on non-music related occasions. Which is why I started to question this in the first place. Their attitude towards teaching was kind of like, I'm no teacher, so we'll just hang and I'll show you some stuff. My drummer had the same conversation with the drummer from the band.

Yeah, I'm not looking for high fives or that a boys. Just INFORMATION!!:bassist: