Song I recorded: Thoughts?

[Ezmar]

Here's a song I recorded last February. It's not the greatest recording, because I didn't have a whole lot of time to work in the studio with it. All parts are written and performed by myself, and I did most of it in one or two takes, so there wasn't much refining going on. Think of it as a demo. I'd like to add another guitar line during the second verse, for example. I do like how the guitar solo turned out, though. and the Bass is SOLID.

SoundClick artist: Ezmar - page with MP3 music downloads

Kinda Rush. Just a little. Okay, a lot.

[ric3xrt]

Had the guys here at work tapping thier feet..vocals remind me of a cross between David Burn and rick ocassic(sp) the song is bit long ,but good

[Ezmar]

Yeah, I didn't get an opportunity to work out some shortenings, like I could have left out some of the chorus progressions. The thing was, I laid the Bass track down first, and I was sort of just guessing at how many I'd need, and I guessed a little high. The intro could be half as long, for example. or some of the repetitions before the verses. It would have been easier if I'd worked with it with a group of people, instead of all by myself in my head, but It is what it is. I'm eventually going to rerecord it when I get a band together.

[onlyclave]

Huh, odd meter "Ghost of a Chance".

[Ezmar]

I know, right? I didn't realize that until later, so I wasn't ripping off so much as it was sort of there. Like I said, very rush, especially Roll the Bones. The verse is different, though, give me that.

[hernameisrio]

I'm not a big prog rock fan at all, but I think once it gets going, it gets going good...which is great! :-P A+ on the vocals and the bass, very solid. I feel like the first minute or so drags a bit and is a little much with the drums...too much fill...maybe strip it back and start it out as sort of a minimal piece, THEN bring in the drums?

[ric3xrt]

maybe strip it back and start it out as sort of a minimal piece, THEN bring in the drums?[/quote]



I think will make it stand alone and take that Rush fell away...It would also be a good way to shorten the tune.

[MonetBass]

I like this a lot! Vocals remind me of Fish from Marillion. I'd bump the mids up a bit on the solo guitar; it's a little (but not much) thin to me.

I won't comment on the structure, as that is very subjective to me. These days I prefer hearing someone trying to create art as opposed to a 'hit record'.

The performances are very good, and the track overall has a cool vibe. Good work!

[Ezmar]

Originally Posted by hernameisrio

I'm not a big prog rock fan at all, but I think once it gets going, it gets going good...which is great! :-P A+ on the vocals and the bass, very solid. I feel like the first minute or so drags a bit and is a little much with the drums...too much fill...maybe strip it back and start it out as sort of a minimal piece, THEN bring in the drums?

Yeah, for one thing, when recording the drums for the intro, I was sort of unsure as to how many times I had vamped the progression, so I was trying to stay with the click, remember how many times were left, and try to play drums. I'm a relatively good drummer, but I lose time on runs, so when I need to try and focus on time, the runs themselves become unimaginative and sucky. If I'd had more takes, it would have been a lot better.

Personally I'd cut out the second repetition before the verse, although it would seem kind of lopsided, because I have them set up in groups of 4... That's why this got so long, because I have each chord repetition over 2 measures, each phrase over 4 measures, and each musical sentence over 8.

It's hard to think about what could be cut out, without actually trying it and hearing if it sounds weird. I sort of was generous with some of the vamps. just imagine, laying down the bass for the solo. I just went on and on and on, because I figured we could always cut some out if we needed to, and then I got on the guitar, and ended up just filling all that time with solo anyway... It's like I want to keep every individual part, just the length it is, but it's kind of unnecessary. The only thing I can think of is a superfluous repetition after the first chorus, and then reworking the second verse somehow, because I don't need so much time without vocals, because that musical idea was already introduced.

And unfortunately, I didn't have anything to do with the Mastering, that was all done afterwards. There are so many little things I'd tweak, like the guitar tone, I'd have added guitar to the intro, the keyboards could have been a little beefier and less spacey, I could have held that note at the end AT LEAST another 25% longer, etc.

[hernameisrio]

I know what you mean, there are ALWAYS changes and tweaks one can make to a final song...how did you record it, do you have Pro Tools or Logic? If you have the capability to edit the tracks easily, I would just try doing a few simple edits to give yourself a few other options for the song. Once you start cutting it down a bit, you might find that it's easier to commit to making a change.

[Ezmar]

I recorded it in a studio. I actually know a guy who co-owns one, and for an elective thing at our school, he took some people in, sort of as a "recording experience" thing. It was with protools, the most recent version, I believe, but we were only there for about 3 days, and we were recording a lot of other stuff, too. None of us actually got to do much with the actual production stuff, me least of all, because I was drumming on pretty much everything, because I was the only drummer. And I only really have the full track, because I don't personally have all the individual instrumental tracks.

I have audacity, and that could work, in a VERY slight pinch, but I think I'm going to wait until I can get a band together and hash it out with a full group.

[lokerola]

Sounds good man. Kinda of reminds me of Rush. It was rocking.