jazz college last year of performance---stress attacks

KingCrimson · #1 09-05-2011, 01:56 PM

hello everyone. I;d just like to ask how to cope with a certain problem i am having.

I'm in Jazz performance in college, its my last year and i can't ****ing take it anymore. I have a year left so i thought i might as well bite the bullet and finish it but holy crap does it make playing a CHORE.

I'm tired of playing the same old cheesy jazz tunes, i can't stand having to solo off of these stupid regurgitated tunes and playing them like @$$ over and over again just so i can pass.

I'm not fast at this stuff and the fact that there are due dates and high expectations make playing or practising this stuff unbearable, but necessary. I hate how i can practise 5 hours a day and still screw up. Which makes it hard because then i show up to combo and the teacher looks at me as if i didn't do my work, even though i spent a lot of time doing it just not perfecting it.

I'm a bassist not a sax, trumpet or guitar playing. Why does it makes sense that we go in not even knowing how to solo in the first place too well and then we have to solo over crazy bebop tunes with more then 2 changes? Shouldn't i learn how to solo and phrase in the first place?

Recently i have been getting panic attacks and stress. I just can;t do it anymore, i ****ing hate playing all the things you are. I ****ing hate that i have to transpose a solo i already wrote because the singer decided she wanted it in a different key. I ****ing hate that i'm not gifted and it takes me long to do all this crap.

Is there anything i can do to make practising more calming? or bearable? Or focused?

Stick_Player · #2 09-05-2011, 02:10 PM

I'd bail. Give that dreadful slot to someone else.

By the way, are you applying any of this schooling in a real-world situation - such as 10-15 gigs a week? I was doing at least that many my last year of music school, complete with playing All the Things You Are in different keys several times a week. If not, why not? Just curious

There are other vocational options out there:

SBassman · #3 09-05-2011, 02:12 PM

That's an awful lot of hate for someone studying music at the college level - I presume, to make your living playing music.

You should give that some thought.

Ronnietex · #4 09-05-2011, 02:12 PM

Well, yes you Can do it. First, stop saying you can not. You Can push yourself beyond what your mind and/or body say. Music is a discipline. Just like other subjects. It takes discipline.

Here is what I did for law school while working full time, raising a family etc. First, I had to realize that it takes around 21 days on average to make a habit. I got some good advice from others who had done what I was trying. I was very careful not to expose my dreams to those who would be negative. But I dont want to digress too much. Lol, I know the feelings you are having so let me forge onward for ya.

Ok, it takes 21 days to make a habit. (less to break them I think lol!)

Set a time to study and a time to run outdoors if possible. And dont say you cant run unless you can't. Running challenges other parts of the body than acedemics do, i.e. the brain and nervous system.

The reason I suggest outdoor running is you are forced into a different world. It clears up your thinking in ways that are indescribable. You feel better about yourself. You want to jog an hour straight. That is the goal. If you can run five minutes, do it, then walk five, then run five or three or whatever you can do. Start out for an hour running and walking. I dont care if you have to lose sleep, just do it. Trust me, you will find a time to rest.

The exercise discipline overcomes the schoolwork discipline somehow. I dont know why or how, I just know it does. If outdoor running is truly impossible (which it isn't, I actually ran in 100 degree Texas heat at times....) find a gym on campus and do stationary bike riding. I do Not suggest outdoor bike riding when you are super stressed, as you may get injured.

So, if you are already running and having problems still? Maybe try lifting weights instead. Anything that Forces you to think of something else and stimulates your body and makes you feel better about yourself. It is impossible to feel negative when you are feeling better about yourself.

Finally, get a schedule for practice. Do it. Quit saying you can not. Make it just an hour. But for that hour do it. Increase it as you are able. Before you know it the year will be done and you will feel very happy you climbed the mountain!

For gravy, I was in a couple of life situations where I did a lot of praying for strength. But prayer without work is a waste of time, both your and God's time lol! The Bible was also inspirational to me. If you are not religious that's fine, but I pray when I need to, especially on long, extremely bumpy plane flights lol. It is what God is for....

Welcome to the club young man.

jacojbass · #5 09-05-2011, 02:17 PM

having been through it...and doing it again...just keep plugging away, have patience and step away some times to breathe..... as for deadlines ect...if it is to be your job are good for real world situations...best of luck

KingCrimson · #6 09-05-2011, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stick_Player

I'd bail. Give that dreadful slot to someone else.

By the way, are you applying any of this schooling in a real-world situation - such as 10-15 gigs a week? I was doing at least that many my last year of music school, complete with playing All the Things You Are in different keys several times a week. If not, why not? Just curious

There are other vocational options out there:

No i'm not. I'm not a strong jazz player. Even though i practise it a lot. To be honest it takes me longer to learn things then others. I have real diagnosed ADHD and i'm not the fastest thinker. As for gigs i have not been able to find any groups to do this with, even though i would love to. It would probably make me a better player and make it more bearable.

Stick_Player · #7 09-05-2011, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SBassman

That's an awful lot of hate for someone studying music at the college level - I presume, to make your living playing music.

You should give that some thought.

Geeze! There's NO hate in what I said. Simply stating it the way it is. Plenty of thought and experience behind my statement. If one doesn't enjoy the music, why play it? I'll assume the OP is in his early 20s. How is he going to deal with "All the Things You Are" when he's 50?

Looking at his profile, it seems as if he'd be 'happier' pursuing a different style of music.

KingCrimson · #8 09-05-2011, 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SBassman

That's an awful lot of hate for someone studying music at the college level - I presume, to make your living playing music.

You should give that some thought.

The hate is because i find it pointless to have to spend so much time on a genre I will not want to really play out of school. I have one of the top studio bassists in the city as a teacher and the stuff that he gives me i have no time to practise because i'm doing this jazz crap all the time. And its not like we are playing some crazy cool modal jazz its all these cheesy standards and bebop tunes.

I spend all my practise time soloing, not because i want to but i HAVE to. My brain gets tired i get worked up and i just can't focus anymore.

Really i don't give two ****'s about soloing in jazz, unless its fusion, which is usually less chord changes. I'm questioning, if i am going to be out of this school as a decent player why am i learning how to play like Charlie Parker and not like Ron Carter? Why aren't i spending my time learning Jamerson and Jaco Tunes but instead playing eighth notes and triplet runs. If nobody gives a crap about the bass solo in jazz and walking is its MOST IMPORTANT role why aren't i lifting a bunch of walking bass lines.

My walking is mediocre my soloing sucks. I'd rather be a great time keeper/groover then a crappy soloist.

As for my metal band that you can see on my profile....i'd shoot myself if that was all i did musically as well, i want to be a solid groove player. Albeit the metal is just good ole fun and a nice vent.

**Freddels** · #9 09-05-2011, 02:31 PM

Playing walking bass is being the time keeper/groover.

KingCrimson · #10 09-05-2011, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Freddels

Playing walking bass is being the time keeper/groover.

thats exactly what i was saying. All i have have time to do is soloing because thats what my improv teacher asks for as the most important part of class. Its bloody frustrating. I enjoy walking a lot.

**Freddels** · #11 09-05-2011, 02:42 PM

In your improve class, is there a rhythm section playing while everyone else is doing their solos? If yes, then they should be playing while you do your solos. I want the drums and keyboard/guitarist playing just as hard as they play for everyone else. Historically, everyone cut out for the bass solo b/c otherwise nobody would be able to hear it. There's no reason for that anymore with all the amplification available.

Ed Fuqua · #12 09-05-2011, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KingCrimson

No i'm not. I'm not a strong jazz player. Even though i practise it a lot. To be honest it takes me longer to learn things then others. I have real diagnosed ADHD and i'm not the fastest thinker. As for gigs i have not been able to find any groups to do this with, even though i would love to. It would probably make me a better player and make it more bearable.

If it was easy, everybody would do it.

waleross · #13 09-05-2011, 03:01 PM

Take a real deep breath......Ok in my experience, I was also up against it. Finishing what you start(9 years for me to finish) is more important than being better than your peers, fellow bass players, etc. I went through it as do a lot of other musicians. I realized that there were thousands of bass players and other musicians better than I'll ever be. Recently since I returned to music, I have been studying with a keyboard teacher and of course we play "All The Things You Are", what you don't want to do is quit on yourself. Don't give up.......

**Staccato** · #14 09-05-2011, 03:31 PM

Prepare to grow beyond what you have imagined. It's vital to see yourself evolving as a musician, and imagine yourself becoming successful-to better fit into the world that will be waiting after graduation. And, take your practice well beyond 5 hours per day on some occasions. Live it, breathe it, and graduation will be here-soon enough.

KingCrimson · #15 09-05-2011, 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ed Fuqua

If it was easy, everybody would do it.

I agree but i'm also a firm believer that people who truly love what music they play will be better and excel at it more then the person who is forced into liking it. Believe me it would a lot smoother if i actually like "All the things you are".

jazz wont get you gigs, (especially on electric bass) being able to read proficiently, having impeccable time and being a strong rhythm player will, so why am i putting all this time on things that won't help me as much in that aspect as if i went right to the meat and potatoes and studied what the bass's role really is.

But alas this thread's point was to ask some ways to help cope with doing things you don't like. I can't do all the work that i am given, it seems my bass lessons are a waste of time considering they don't focus on jazz.

I mean i'm torturing myself playing this stuff now, i flat out don't give a crap about soloing.

The Poster above me has a quote from Beethoven saying "To play without passion is inexcusable", you can't fake or learn passion for something you are not passionate about

LM Bass · #16 09-05-2011, 04:27 PM

Trying to be helpful- Is there a pro-active step you can take?
Is you Improv teacher open to meeting with you for a sec, and discussing playing a tune you really like? (you buy the donuts). Saying that all the tunes suck leaves you with nothing. Do little homework, and find a tune you can suggest.
Can you ask your private teacher to focus on this material and help you through it?
Can you get some tutoring that will help you out -maybe with a recent graduate?
It's your job to find a way to love music, all music. Find something you can dig, and keep stoking that inspiration.

Ed Fuqua · #17 09-05-2011, 07:39 PM

OK. Good luck with that.
Have a blessed day.

**Freddels** · #18 09-05-2011, 08:06 PM

Somehow you decided to study music at this particular institution. You made it through 3 years so far. What's different this year?

KingCrimson · #19 09-05-2011, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Freddels

Somehow you decided to study music at this particular institution. You made it through 3 years so far. What's different this year?

The only difference is i've been beating the same old dead horse for 2 years and when i figured out how i learn and what i want to learn, which was a big motivator i get the most intense playing class i've ever had, improv.

Believe me i love jazz, but jazz is a broad term, (i'm listening to Afro Blue as i type, i love coltrane).

For some reason it seems this stuff doesn't stick in my head. It seems like music college opened my eyes to how weak of a musician i actually am, or at least tats what it feels like. I have much less motivation to keep playing this standard jazz. Its cool i understand a lot of the theory, and i have learned how to analyze music as well as having the possibility to grow. Its just this year is giving me a lot of work i can not keep up with. I learn at a slower rate so its stressful when you have so much to do in so little time.
I'm not passionate about the jazz we do to become an amazing player. Give me some Jaco, weather report, Mahavishnu Orchestra, Miles or Coltrane in their modal era's and i'll take more interest in jazz. I like heavy.

I've made the conclusion that i'm not a strong enough bassist to be working in anything super serious that pays. I wanted to take as much as i could out of this last year and focus on groove, reading and a repertoire so i can at least have some essentials when i get out.

StevieDaBassist · #20 09-05-2011, 10:03 PM

I think there is a point in every musician's life where they have their eyes opened that there are people a lot better than them and that they aren't as good as they think they are. The trick is to view that in a light that motivates you to become better. Think about it like this: the standard stuff that you say you don't like (swing, bebop) is some of the basis, or foundation, of the music you do like. It is part of the progression. We couldn't have gotten to Weather Report in the 70's without bebop before it. Jaco wouldn't have been Jaco if he hadn't transcribed Charlie Parker's bebop lines onto his bass. Even if there is some of it you don't like, it makes you a more well rounded player and gives you greater understanding for the other types of music you do like to play. It will also open up job opportunities if you are able to solo. I know it can be frustrating, but try to look at it as a building block to the things you want to do out of college.