Self confidence - Page 2

Billyzoom · #21 05-16-2011, 11:37 PM

One thing that helps me, though I'm still way too tentative when playing in front of others, is to, when practicing or playing along with something, to force myself to continue after making a mistake or losing my place.

I had developed a habit of stopping and starting over, or just getting tired of trying and moving on to something else.

The problem with this, of course, was that if I made a mistake in front of others I felt panicked and would really lose my place, rather than it being something I knew I could recover from quickly. So the more I made myself continue with the music no matter what, the faster I could recover and the more confident I became.

I wish I could get over this, though. I'm even tentative when playing for my instructor. But I can stand up in front of 300 people and speak for hours with no problem. Go figure.

ras1983 · #22 05-17-2011, 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Billyzoom

One thing that helps me, though I'm still way too tentative when playing in front of others, is to, when practicing or playing along with something, to force myself to continue after making a mistake or losing my place.

I had developed a habit of stopping and starting over, or just getting tired of trying and moving on to something else.

The problem with this, of course, was that if I made a mistake in front of others I felt panicked and would really lose my place, rather than it being something I knew I could recover from quickly. So the more I made myself continue with the music no matter what, the faster I could recover and the more confident I became.

I wish I could get over this, though. I'm even tentative when playing for my instructor. But I can stand up in front of 300 people and speak for hours with no problem. Go figure.

I think that's the only way to practice recovering from 'mistakes' - just keep going, whether it be while we're practicing or performing in front of an audience.

ps your last sentence is so true! Lol.

TolerancEJ · #23 05-18-2011, 10:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Billyzoom

...I wish I could get over this, though. I'm even tentative when playing for my instructor. But I can stand up in front of 300 people and speak for hours with no problem. Go figure.

I'm the opposite. I'd much rather play the instrument than speak in front of a crowd. My public speaking (and singing) skills are pretty much nonexistent.

UncleMattGuy · #24 05-18-2011, 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ras1983

I think that's the only way to practice recovering from 'mistakes' - just keep going, whether it be while we're practicing or performing in front of an audience.

ps your last sentence is so true! Lol.

^
this. Also I learned this one a long time ago-
There will be mistakes. Flat out. Either you or a bandmate will eventually hit a bum note or miss a beat. Never give the stinkeye!! If you need to acknowledge the mistake in order to recover LAUGH . It will put the band at ease and won't point out to the audience that a mistake was just made.

bassyj · #25 06-19-2011, 07:07 AM

Start small and put yourself in situations where you can be successful... Eventually you will start to forget that you're nervous and start having fun! Also, don't take music so seriously. I used to get really upset when a gig didn't go great or the sound was bad and of all people... A singer said "man, why do you play music if it stresses you out so much?" that changed the way I look at being on stage and I haven't had a bad gig since! I find if I enjoy what I'm doing I make less mistakes because I'm in the moment, and the ones I do make don't matter as much

Allen_VA · #26 06-21-2011, 09:15 AM

I have a tough time with this too! When I rehearse, I often try to mentally picture a crowd out in front of me - that usually is enough to make me feel nervous even when I'm rehearsing only with my band! Once I experience that feeling, I spend some time with it and gradually become more comfortable with it. When I'm playing live, I try to focus on a person or people who look like they're really having a good time, smiling, dancing, etc - and I sort of feed off their positive energy, as it were.

Allen_VA · #27 06-21-2011, 09:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UncleMattGuy

^
this. Also I learned this one a long time ago-
There will be mistakes. Flat out. Either you or a bandmate will eventually hit a bum note or miss a beat. Never give the stinkeye!! If you need to acknowledge the mistake in order to recover LAUGH . It will put the band at ease and won't point out to the audience that a mistake was just made.

I like this point a lot - as a musician watching a performance, I usually can tell when someone did something "wrong" by their body language before my ears pick up on it. Notes are notes, they don't have an inherent "wrong" or "right" quality to them. It's the situation that notes are put in that make them "feel" 'wrong' or 'right'. And even then, 'wrong or right' is usually more a matter of the listener's interpretation of 'I am not used to hearing this vs. i am used to hearing this'.

iD Entity · #28 06-29-2011, 05:12 AM

Not sure what I can add to this already great thread, so I'll just talk about my experience, maybe could help someone.

I joined my first band a while back, and we've been writing originals, with the intention of playing live. I was concerned about stage fright, and really wanted to get it out of my system before getting onto a stage for real. That comment about having a hard time playing in front of their bass instructor made me laugh, that's exactly how I feel in front of my bass and piano teachers!!

Anyway, I learned about this local jam club, where you could go with your instrument (or use one of the venues selection), and just randomly play with people in the bar. Didn't matter if people were good or not, the point was to go, make noise, do your best and have fun. So I started going regularly, and over the weeks my shakes and 'tightness' just sort of... fizzled away. It's made me much more comfortable and confident, I'm used to shrugging off my many bum notes (lol) and moving on. I'm still nervous, but it's no longer hindering me like I felt it used to.

If you have something like that in your area, and you're concerned about representing your band on a premier gig, maybe it could help you, too.

Here's a snippet from a Dave Lombardo drum clinic, fast forward to 6:20:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=eR0x0DXUD6s
Even the great Tom Araya is affected by it...

BuffaloBass · #29 06-29-2011, 05:42 AM

It's when I look up at the crowd too long or sniff a hot skirt walking by the stage

, then I screw up! I donnow if that is stage fright, or the inability to "walk and chew gum", but I have somewhat adopted a "modified third eye" semi-conscious technique to sort of "feel" the crowd, but not "see" them. In this mode, I can sense them, and am aware of our ability to "groove" them, but remain focused on the groove and pulse, and not them.

Also, if I start making mistakes, I TURN UP, to lessen the finger pressures and really focus on each note and space. You may think that is like salt in an open wound, but it allows me to focus on pulse/groove even more ( internal) and dial the "anxiety" ( external) out even more.

Kripes, that sounds odd, but true!

And this from someone who literally played out hundred and hundreds of time before I was 18. Now at 50, I think its the skirts that really screw up my concentration. Even more so than at 18. Its a good thing, right?

Justbleazy · #30 12-23-2011, 01:38 PM

A bit late to the party but oh well lol.

I had my real first gig about a month ago where I was backed by a 5 piece band in front of 400 people.

I had the BG's all morning, couldn't stop shaking because I was that nervous. About 5 minutes before my performance, I was like I could leave out the back door and say that I was sick lol. Then, I came to my senses and prayed to God and asked God if I could "borrow" his audience for the song.

Instantly, my BG's disappeared (lol) and I stopped shaking and I was actually excited to go on stage.

While playing, the drummer did a drum fill a little bit early and kind of threw everyone off but I kept playing like it didn't happen. We jammed so much, we forgot to do the vamp and the bridge, they went straight into my solo. I had to freestyle for about a minute.

Anyway, prayer imo is the best cure for the butterflies and a huge boost in confidence.

ras1983 · #31 12-23-2011, 10:10 PM

Kudos for having the guts to say that on a public forum.

cire113 · #32 01-12-2012, 05:53 PM

the more you do something the more comfortable you become...

maybe i should talk to more hot girls lol

sayman · #33 01-12-2012, 11:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cire113

the more you do something the more comfortable you become...

maybe i should talk to more hot girls lol

We should all talk to more hot girls (or whatever gender you prefer - it's all good).

All this advice is excellent. For me - practice, practice, practice until I'm really comfortable with what I'm performing (still working on that), and laughing off the inevitable mistakes. Sometimes I mentally comfort myself with the promise of a treat - like a cheeseburger after the gig. Weird, but works for me.

We all have different motivations - positive or negative - and finding what works for you is key. I've read Michael Jordon was cut from his High-School basketball team and was told he would never be a good player. We all know how that turned out...

Ant Wellington · #34 01-14-2012, 12:07 AM

Man, I'm very in touch with why started playing the bass. To get girls!!!!

-aw

sayman · #35 01-14-2012, 12:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ant Wellington

Man, I'm very in touch with why started playing the bass. To get girls!!!!

-aw

Hope they're treating you well in New Orleans!

Ant Wellington · #36 01-15-2012, 07:19 AM

New Orleans is great! The clinic was amazing. It looks like I'll be coming back every couple of months. I'm excited about that.

-anthony

sayman · #37 07-13-2012, 06:21 PM

Old thread, I know, but I was reading about Yo-Yo Ma and some things he said about creativity and confidence:

"If you ate only worried about making a mistake, then you will communicate nothing. You will have missed the point of making music, which is to make people feel something "

There was more about making your mistake, accepting it with good humor and regarding it as a sort of ice-breaker for the performance.

sayman · #38 07-13-2012, 06:24 PM

Or you can do what Victor says and turn a mistake into part of your performance - "There are no wrong notes", or something to that effect.

cire113 · #39 07-14-2012, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sayman

Or you can do what Victor says and turn a mistake into part of your performance - "There are no wrong notes", or something to that effect.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQRCEOo6VwI

dude i got a perfect example of for you check out victors solos from 2:41-2:49.. LOL what a recovery... He does it quit a few other times..

I love how victor isn't afraid to play wrong notes;

Check it out anthony and victor play the same exact KILLER lick but sound different in their own way

1:47-1:48-victor
4:07-4:08-anthony

sayman · #40 07-14-2012, 03:12 PM

Thanks for the link! I have to say that although I *think* I hear a "bad" note accent or two, I honestly can't tell where the mistakes are. It's either my bad ear or Victor's proficiency at weaving it into a phrase that sounds intentional.

I actually like Anthony's solo better - and not just because this is his thread

.

Hope I don't get flamed for that one! Big Victor fan here. Chalk that up to my bad ear too, if anyone must.

Some mad bowing going on there too!