Bass Comebacks

[Ben1123]

Hey, i know a guy that always says things like, bass is just big guitar with less strings, and other bass related insults. He's a guitarist, so what are some good comebacks to things like that?

[Big Joe]

If you could play thick strings and do it in time and you wouldn't need us.

[f'nar f'nar]

Big and thick? Nah, it's just all in proportion small-fry.

[Electra Player]

Kick him in the um...you know.
There's no safe way to say it.
It's the best comeback, it'll shut him up -or alter his voice- for quite a while.
Or, just let me know what kind of guitar he plays and I can go on that.

[kobass]

Don't sweat it, man. YOU are driving the train.


That is all.

[troyus]

He plays the baby guitar. It has a little neck and is for p***ies. *


* The word I am blocking out is actually "puppies".

[makanudo]

just stay, without the bass your guitar is just noise..

[notforrobots]

sleep with his girlfriend

[f'nar f'nar]

Originally Posted by notforrobots

sleep with his girlfriend

Best. Idea. EVER.

[Big Joe]

Originally Posted by notforrobots

sleep with his girlfriend

She's probably a skank with a fe-mullet... You only go after the singer's woman.

[basste]

Just say "Yes, you're right" and smile. He will be happy and never more bother you with that BS.

[Phalex]

Simply explain to him that the body of a typical bass guitar weighs just about as much the head of a typical sledge hammer. The neck on a 34" scale bass is actually longer than the handle on a sledge hammer and provides better leverage.

Then point out the fact that his comments tend to put you in a bit of a nasty mood, and that you stand next to the drummer and behind the guitar player when the band is onstage.

If subtlety doesn't work, whack him over the head with your bass.

[dougjwray]

Simply glare at him with one eye shut, stiffen your whole body, lean forward a bit, tremble, and start to clench and unclench both hands simultaneously.
Always works for me...
P.S. This approach is also useful in situations like the one mentioned in another thread right now: the keyboard player with the heavy left hand.

[RED5]

"Don't make me turn it up"

[Ripper]

buy something with a sharp and pointy headstock

[RedsFan75]

Originally Posted by Phalex

Simply explain to him that the body of a typical bass guitar weighs just about as much the head of a typical sledge hammer. The neck on a 34" scale bass is actually longer than the handle on a sledge hammer and provides better leverage.

Then point out the fact that his comments tend to put you in a bit of a nasty mood, and that you stand next to the drummer and behind the guitar player when the band is onstage.

If subtlety doesn't work, whack him over the head with your bass.

This one I like!!!

The one that gets me, is "Well the guitarist could play bass on this song" HAH!

[peabody]

How about...

"That may be true...but your mama....."

[Steve]

How about:

Blank Stare

Or:

"Gee, it must be horrible to be so insecure."

[OldBluesGuy]

Originally Posted by troyus

He plays the baby guitar. It has a little neck and is for p***ies. *


* The word I am blocking out is actually "puppies".

I just love "puppies"! They're warm and furry and so much fun to play with! If you play with them enough they get all excited and make cute little noises. I like to get down on the floor so my face is right up close to them so I can breathe in that happy "puppy" smell. Of course if you get them too excited they'll leave a wet spot, but that's a small price to pay. Ah, good times!



obg

[Roflcopter]

wow.