how to get someone out of a band...?????

hoppusandriano · #1 03-19-2007, 04:30 PM

Ok well im 15 years old and have a band consisting of 4 people. The guitarist,myself, and the drummer really got it together and recently a rythym guitarist and she's really bad. She cant remember anything...even a 4 chord song with the same chord progression. We're good friends with her but we want her out without ruining the friendship so we need some good ideas to get her out. All advice is appreciated...thanks.

Matthew Bryson · #2 03-19-2007, 04:58 PM

Are the rest of you boys? Maybe you guys could eat a lot of beans and fart a lot at practice. The girl might be offended while the guys are just amused. You could "gross her out" so to speak...
Uh, seriously, why was she asked to join if she can't play well enough to be in the band? This is why people should "audition" or "try out" for a band, rather than just being asked in. So that you don't have to kick them out.
Maybe you could tell her that you guys have enough guitar in your sound and you'd like her to switch to tambourine - to help out the band more. Or tell her that she is so loud that she is overwhelming the sound of the band - then turn her down until you can't hear her anymore and then say "perfect" now the mix is great, I hear everybody.
Uh, kick her in the shins and tell her that girls are stupid and she has to go.
Okay, I'm out of ideas.

RWP · #3 03-19-2007, 05:06 PM

Maybe you should offer to practice with her on a regular basis without the rest of the band. If you are friends it would be worth trying to help her out.

brianbj46 · #4 03-19-2007, 05:25 PM

you could always do the method of pretending like everyone in the band is too busy, and the whole band is splitting up. Then just hold practice without telling her.

invader3k · #5 03-19-2007, 06:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brianbj46

you could always do the method of pretending like everyone in the band is too busy, and the whole band is splitting up. Then just hold practice without telling her.

Ah, the professional way.

driver800 · #6 03-19-2007, 06:47 PM

can she sing? that'd be a good way to change her role in the band without getting rid of her.

Just be honest and treat her with respect. Imagine if it was you, what would you want them to do?

**Eric Perry** · #7 03-19-2007, 07:05 PM

"You. Out!!!"

IconBasser · #8 03-19-2007, 07:59 PM

+1 on the singing. I love bands with chick singers! most metal people detest the idea, but some of my favs have chick singers. Ever hear of After Forever or Darkwell?

Phalex · #9 03-20-2007, 06:53 AM

The drummer needs to quit the band. Then the bassist (naturally) follows the drummer and starts a new project with a totally different line up.

Worked out OK for me once.......

HomeBrewTJ · #10 03-20-2007, 08:57 AM

If you're only 15, are the rest of you that good either?

tZer · #11 03-20-2007, 09:08 AM

Honesty is the best policy.

Sit down with her and explain your feelings. If you have all decided that she just is not right for your situation, "man up" and let her know. That is the honest and respectful thing to do and you owe it to her as a friend and in the spirit of being professional.

Alternately - if you want to try to make it work, let her know your feelings - that you, as a group, don't think she is quite living up to the groups needs and you want to find a way to help her improve. She may improve and actually rise to the occasion or she may see that she is not getting there and it will be more clear that she probably needs to leave and work on her chops.

Bottom line, all the 'tongue-in-cheek' responses here are cute, but really not very conducive to a professional or respectful approach to your situation. It's sometimes hard to be a good friend and even harder to do the right thing, but ultimately those are the things that define you. Be someone who is not afraid to do the hard stuff. A real friend may be hurt initially but will appreciate the fact that you are straight with them in the long run.

kydnav · #12 03-20-2007, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IconBasser

+1 on the singing. I love bands with chick singers! most metal people detest the idea, but some of my favs have chick singers. Ever hear of After Forever or Darkwell?

I was going to say that over here you can hardly avoid metal bands with female singers... But then you brought up the whole after forever thingey...
If you like the metal with chicksingerthing you should check out within temptation and delain.. (last one is rather new) but those bands are nearly the only ones nowadays that make it out of Holland (I heard they absolutely dig them in Germany and Finland and such)

Bryan316 · #13 03-20-2007, 01:55 PM

Do it like every other band with females in them.

Start sleeping with her, piss her off, then she quits. You get poonanny, she gets out of the band, win-win!

Have I mentioned I'm evil?

Steve S · #14 03-21-2007, 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brianbj46

you could always do the method of pretending like everyone in the band is too busy, and the whole band is splitting up. Then just hold practice without telling her.

I did that while in a band when I was 16....told a drummer that we were disolving then got together with someone else. It was ok until the old drummer came to a show that we were at...boy was he upset! Never spoke to any of us again and that was 40 years ago.

invader3k · #15 03-21-2007, 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steve S

I did that while in a band when I was 16....told a drummer that we were disolving then got together with someone else. It was ok until the old drummer came to a show that we were at...boy was he upset! Never spoke to any of us again and that was 40 years ago.

Yeah, see, that's exactly how that always plays out. Unless you're not really acquainted with that person or live in some huge metropolis, chances are they're going to find out sooner than later that you're continuing the band without them.

Have the courtesy to talk to people and tell them how you feel. It saves a ton of frustration on both sides.