Need words of wisdom to keep me going (LONG post included)

[funkycoldmedina]

This is going to long, I apologize. I just find myself at an impasse and I want to vent and would like to hear some pearls of wisdom, advice, etc.

To preface this, I come from a very music family all the way back to my great grandfather who played upright bass in a mexican band in the area years ago. My great uncle plays keyboards and he started my uncle and cousins on guitar, electric bass and keyboards when they were really young and they ended up playing together in a band for almost 15 years opening for acts like Barry Manilow and the spice girls before eventually calling it quits. They all still play but not on a professional level anymore.

I think a lot of this is where my desire to become a musician comes from. I grew up with these guys as my only male influence and wanted to be just like them. Along the way, I discovered a talent for music and eventually, a drive that now leads me forward. But about me...

From elementary to middle school I played the upright bass but I quit when I moved on to high school to become a vocalist. I was pretty good at the DB in school (second chair in all city), especially for a kid who never practiced. So I begged my mom to buy me an electric bass because I "still wanted to play" and guess what it did... Collect dust for like 6 years.

All throughout high school I continued as a vocal music student, but never got back into playing the bass. I went to community college on vocal music scholarship as a theatre student, flunked out and spent the next three years as a hopeless bum.

Well, at the start of last semester, I decided that I wanted to go back to school and I wanted to major in Music this time. I really wanted to get back into playing the bass and I knew I couldn't get back into school as a vocal major (after losing my scholarship three years prior) so I enrolled as an instrumental major thinking "it'll all come back to me really quickly, I come from a musical family."

Well playing an instrument is not like riding a bike and I had to start from ground zero in an environment filled with kids younger than me who had been playing for years longer than me. I am still not in any of the bands on campus because I wasn't good enough at that time.

Well Fast forward nine months and I am light years ahead of where I was at the beginning of the school year. I practice all the time, I'm developing a jazz/funk/pop repetoire, I am able to read music, I follow chord changes great, I can make up jazz walking bass lines, I can cop some of the great basslines (Jamerson for the win!) I have a full year of music theory/aural skills and composition under my belt and I finally feel like I am at least a mediocre bass player. Even my teacher is amazed at how good I've gotten and how much I apply myself. I mean we've been transcribing Marcus, Jaco, Jamerson, Bernard Edwards and others since about 4 months in. And next year, (hopefully) I'll be back on instrumental scholarship and be playing with the jazz and show bands.

My problem is, I'm 22 years old and barely mediocre while all the other kids at the school are good to great and maybe eighteen. So I constantly compare myself to the other students even though I know I shouldn't. If I really look at it, I came into the school year completely blind, have gotten A's in theory, piano, bass and aural skills, all while having an 18 month old to take care of when I get home. So I think I'm entitled to say I've done pretty damn good. But then I hear them play and that confidence goes out the window.

I really want to start playing live with bands now that I'm getting, dare I say, really good. But this is where I run into major road blocks...

I don't have any friends who play music that might want to start a band. I don't know of any open jams in the area. Most of my area musicians are either "DEATH METAL FTW" or want "ONLY EXPERIENCED MUSICIANS WITH 6+ YEARS OF BAND EXPERIENCE." (Craigslist is full of this stuff). Well I don't have 6+ years of experience, and while I will play anything, I don't do metal lol.

I have a pretty BA gk half-stack, a nice fender p-bass special, a smoking jazz 5 now, and I keep finding myself pouring money into changing things like pickups and aesthetic things like tuners and a bridge, but I wonder why I'm doing it? I really want to put Nordy's in my PJ but I feel like whats the point if the only people who are going to hear the great new tone are me, my family and the neighbors. Sure it makes me feel good, but then I start to think I'm wasting my money.

So what do you do when you want to make a career out of music but you feel to inexperienced at your age to be taken seriously? My bass teacher is an inspiration to me because he started at 23 and is now a phenomenal player who plays professionally with acts like Joseph Vincelli. So it CAN be done. I just feel like I'm lost and if I don't start getting out and playing live and doing gigs (for money hopefully) that I may never get it.

I guess this is really just a rant/vent of information because I feel frustrated. Would love to hear your guys' stories or advice if you have any. I'm so sorry that this post is SOOO long

Thanks for listening.

[()smoke()]

sounds like you have the gear, have some talent, and want to do it...go for it, and don't let anything minor like what others are doing stand in your way...you may be 4 years older, but think about that, it's not a bad thing to have 4 years of life experience more than someone else, is it?

[erock0138]

Well all I could say is this, You never know what may come up in the future, or who may call you to play bass. I got a call out of No where from a friend of a friend who tours nationally, and luckily i got the gig. I never thought that it'd happen like that at all, but it did. And all of those years I spent at my house practicing, and all of my money invested, was finally put to the test for that one hour audition. Totally worth it in my book. It's just hard when you're in the in between stage, still unsure of what may happen. But it sounds like you're on the right track. Keep it up.


Live without any regrets my friend, and don't fret, unless it's on your bass

[Mr wiggl3s]

Bruce had me up to three miles a day, really at a good pace. We’d run the three miles in twenty-one or twenty-two minutes. Just under eight minutes a mile [Note: when running on his own in 1968, Lee would get his time down to six-and-a half minutes per mile]. So this morning he said to me “We’re going to go five.” I said, “Bruce, I can’t go five. I’m a helluva lot older than you are, and I can’t do five.” He said, “When we get to three, we’ll shift gears and it’s only two more and you’ll do it.” I said “Okay, hell, I’ll go for it.” So we get to three, we go into the fourth mile and I’m okay for three or four minutes, and then I really begin to give out. I...’m tired, my heart’s pounding, I can’t go any more and so I say to him, “Bruce if I run any more,” –and we’re still running-”if I run any more I’m liable to have a heart attack and die.” He said, “Then die.” It made me so mad that I went the full five miles. Afterward I went to the shower and then I wanted to talk to him about it. I said, you know, “Why did you say that?” He said, “Because you might as well be dead. Seriously, if you always put limits on what you can do, physical or anything else, it’ll spread over into the rest of your life. It’ll spread into your work, into your morality, into your entire being. There are no limits. There are plateaus, but you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. If it kills you, it kills you. A man must constantly exceed his level."

well. there ya go.

[jeff5311]

sounds to me like you have something your peers don't -- vocal skills.

a bass player that can sing harmony will always be in high demand. keep playing, but also singing and you'll have more gigs than you know what to do with...

[thetaxmiser]

You seem to think it is all about instrumental chops. Its not. I read your post and see that you are a singing bass player...probably a pretty damn good singer. From your musical theater and family experience I suspect you have been exposed to a variety of styles.

The only thing I didn't see mentioned is a good knowledge of tunes although you may already have that since you are transcribing Jamerson lines.

Singer + Bass Player + taste + versatility = a gigging fool.

[EdHunter]

Get a car and an amp. A bassist with his own gear and transport will always get a gig.

[funkycoldmedina]

Originally Posted by ()smoke()

you may be 4 years older, but think about that, it's not a bad thing to have 4 years of life experience more than someone else, is it?

Good way to look at it thank you.

Originally Posted by erock0138

Well all I could say is this, You never know what may come up in the future, or who may call you to play bass. I got a call out of No where from a friend of a friend who tours nationally, and luckily i got the gig. I never thought that it'd happen like that at all, but it did. And all of those years I spent at my house practicing, and all of my money invested, was finally put to the test for that one hour audition. Totally worth it in my book. It's just hard when you're in the in between stage, still unsure of what may happen. But it sounds like you're on the right track. Keep it up.


Live without any regrets my friend, and don't fret, unless it's on your bass

That's helpful and inspiring. Thank you. And I love that last quote. If I can figure out how to put something in a signature, that's great...

Originally Posted by Mr wiggl3s

well. there ya go.

That story was a really good way of putting it. Thank you

[funkycoldmedina]

Originally Posted by jeff5311

sounds to me like you have something your peers don't -- vocal skills.

a bass player that can sing harmony will always be in high demand. keep playing, but also singing and you'll have more gigs than you know what to do with...

Originally Posted by thetaxmiser

You seem to think it is all about instrumental chops. Its not. I read your post and see that you are a singing bass player...probably a pretty damn good singer. From your musical theater and family experience I suspect you have been exposed to a variety of styles.

The only thing I didn't see mentioned is a good knowledge of tunes although you may already have that since you are transcribing Jamerson lines.

Singer + Bass Player + taste + versatility = a gigging fool.

You know, that's something I've been trying to really get into doing. But singing and playing bass is really tough to do sometimes haha. The counterpoint thing is okay as I have experience singing four part harmony, its just keeping the rhythm steady while singing. But I know the solution is...

PRACTICE. And K.I.S.S. (Keep it simple stupid)

Just one question... why IS the singing bass player in such demand? Other than if you can sing lead and play you can be the head of your own band ie Rush, Cream, the Police, etc. etc.

But thank you guys for both giving me more to think about.

[funkycoldmedina]

Originally Posted by EdHunter

Get a car and an amp. A bassist with his own gear and transport will always get a gig.

I have a car and an amp. And no gig but its all good. XP

[Nev375]

Your situation could be worse. You could be the best musician around.

Look at it this way, in order to grow and learn you need to be around people who know things that you don't. It might be rough on the ego to feel like the weakest link in the chain, but that's the person who will be growing and absorbing the most through his exercises. (assuming of course, he is still trying)

So check your ego, stop comparing or judging yourself (you are the least qualified to make an objective assessment of your skills anyway.) And just get out there and enjoy playing.

[jdthebassman]

play for yourself first then get a copy of victors groove workshop learn2-10 you will be good to go.

[tangentmusic]

Hey man, It seems to me you're way ahead of the curve here.
You're only 22. You're young. Don't compare yourself to 17-18 year old metal-heads.
Lots of us older guys wish we had the training & background you have.
It sounds as if your musical tastes are beyond your years. Thats a good thing.
You're into Jaco,Jamerson & Marcus. Ahead of the curve for a 22 year old.
You can sing. Big plus as others have pointed out. Use it to your advantage.
being 22, you can play at any bar/lounge/open mic gigs in the area.(there's gotta be some)
Find some older, experienced Jazzers to play with. Older dudes are not opposed to playing with someone like you. They are lookin' for guys like you.
Like I said, seems to me you're ahed of the curve.

[mpdd]

you are 22, no feeling alienated or old until you are at least 28 please
buy a drum machine and make some cools songs on your computer, somebody will want to play with you, just keep playing and creating

[AltGrendel]

Well, you're old enough for bars, see if you can find a jam night somewhere.

[the reddis kid]

ah man i'm 24 and i agree with the craigslist thing. granted i'm pretty much a noob at this point so just trying to look for a drummer is my goal atm. but the whole craigslist thing only wants proven musicians it seems. either way keep ya head up, and keep rockin' man. \m/

[baalroo]

Hey, I see you are here in town, do you go to any local shows? What sort of music are you into or looking to play? Which university are you going to? Friends or WSU? If it's Friends you might know my bands guitar player. I'm 30 and I don't feel alienated, the local music scene is pretty open and welcoming honestly. Oh, and no one worth a #@$* around here uses craigslist for finding bands, so don't even bother.

[bosw04k]

I f you are feeling a bit insecure about your playing, it's because you are measuring yourself up against others too much. There will probably always be someone 'better' than you. I like to go home when I feel like this and run through a 12 bar blues or something, something really simple. And there you go, you just did something 99% of the world's population will never be able to do - that's about 7 billion people you just played better than. But seriously, stop being so competitive and keep your eyes open for that gig! there may not be one now, but one will show up eventually, I promise, and if you have to wait a while, well, you'll only be better from practising when you audition.

[Stumbo]

Originally Posted by funkycoldmedina

I really want to start playing live with bands now that I'm getting, dare I say, really good. But this is where I run into major road blocks...

..... or want "ONLY EXPERIENCED MUSICIANS WITH 6+ YEARS OF BAND EXPERIENCE." (Craigslist is full of this stuff). Well I don't have 6+ years of experience, and while I will play anything, I don't do metal lol.

IMO, your being 22 is a problem in your own mind. It's warping your thinking and creative a big negative for you. Who cares about age! You're an artist with lots of talent. Do it because you love it and everything else will fall into place. Always comparing yourself to others leads to a dead end.

You say you're only 9 months into it and you're reading music and such! Well, there you go...you're on your way to being a pro!

As far as the "6 years band experience" requirement that you see on Cl, forget about that. You have years and years of vocal experience. A lot more than 6 years. I'd go with that. You'll probably sing better than most of the musicians you meet and since you can play bass, you'll be playing around town sooner that you think.

If it was me, I'd concentrate on the vocalist/bass player skills until you can do it w/o a problem. That'll get you out there sooner rather than later.

Keep up the music studies and it sounds to me that you'll be leading your own band one day. With your talent, you are only limited by what your mind can conceive. I say think big!

You don't want to 80 years old w/o stories to tell or worst of all, wishing that you would have pursued music with more energy and effort. Your great-grandfather started a family tradition many years ago and you'll be able to pass it on to your child as time goes on.

Good luck.

PS. Since you do have a lot of responsibilities (with school, baby and all), I suggest you give yourself a six month vitamin boost of a Super B Complex and Vitamin D3 then get a good daily multivitamin if you're not already using one. If you're putting in a lot of hours 24/7 you may get run down and can lead to not having positive thoughts about life. Your doc can advise you.