Depends on the type of music you are providing lights for, your budget, how much time you have to invest, etc. #1 I might suggest using a pc based program such as Martin's "Light Jockey" (
Product - LightJockey 2™) which uses a usb to DMX interface. I'm fairly sure that using this kind of system you can program an entire light show. #2 Bring someone you know and trust in and make them a band member in charge of the lighting. If they are willing to not only do it for free, but also willing to invest time and $$ at first then you are probably off to a good start. #3 Stay away from built in programs. They will make your expensive lighting look cheap. Less is almost always more. Use different colors to create mood not a fireworks show. #4 If your music allows for really atmospheric visuals, incorporate something like "milkdrop" (
MilkDrop - Winamp) with a projector onto a backdrop. With a projector and backdrop you can also incorporate video into the show.