Is Your Wife, Partner, Girlfriend Musically Compatable

martinmcfly · #1 07-30-2011, 05:00 PM

Anyone have partner's they aren't in tune with musically? There's this great Outdoor Concert Venue near me, The Rockyard @ Fantasy Springs Resort and Casino (Indian Casino). They have great World Class Tribute Bands every Sat. Nite and it's free. It's small so you can sit really close to the stage.
Live concerts, shows and performances in Palm Springs âEUR" Fantasy Springs Resort Casino
Last week it was a Boston Tribute Band who we've seen before and they are great! The members also have a Deep Purple Tribute Band so they throw in some Deep Purple songs. The Week before we did go and it was a Foreigner Tribute Band whose members are also in a Bad Company Tribute Band and they are great too. This Week it's 'Queen Nation' a Queen Tribute Band. I'd go every Saturday if I wasn't gigging. I skip the AC/DC and metal stuff though (not my cup of tea). Anyway, last week my wife said she was tired. This week when I told her it was Queen she said, ugggghhhh. I don't know any of their songs. I said, you're kidding, they have great songs and started naming them to her. She kept repsonding, oh yeah, I know that song. Anyway. She still doesn't want to go. She listens to totally contempory music in her car when we use it to go somewhere and when I try to put on what I like she turns it way down. I could call up friends cuz they go a lot but she makes plans with couples in our neighborhood and wants me to stay. If she wasn't so attractive and didn't make so much money I'd probably be out of here. No, I'm just kidding. I do love her and there are many other things we are compatible with. It's just music. She also doesn't like Jazz or Fusion, or the Three Stooges (but what women do?) I should preface this with she does like Classic Rock and British Invasion so she can't be that bad. We also have seen a lot if concerts together and she enjoys them. Petty. McCartney, the Who when they did the Quadraphenia Tour, Fleetwood Mac, Eagles and many more. I guess it really comes down to how can anyone not like Queen? I gotta stop writing novel sized posts. Sorry.

oldcatfish · #2 07-30-2011, 07:24 PM

Marriage is about compromise. Husbands compromise and our wives are then happy. Seriously though, I do have a suggestion. Discuss this with her in a positive only way. Remind her how you love this type of music, but notice that she doesn't. Maybe you two could alternate planning weekends--one weekend it's your music things, the next her couple things. Something like that.

Big Joe · #3 07-30-2011, 07:33 PM

Show some initiative in terms of planning and being positive about "her" stuff and then maybe she'll be more likely to go along with your stuff. If not, you'll have more ammo to get her to go/let you go alone if push comes to shove. I'm a firm believer that it's OK to have separate likes/interests/hobbies as long as they don't interfere with your lives together. Where that comfort zone is will be different from couple to couple.

Talk it out.

That said, I hate queen. Don't make me go either.

DanAleks · #4 07-30-2011, 07:45 PM

Well, first off, I can't stand Queen. Never could.

That said, she wants you to do couples things with her but won't go with you?

Two recommendations:

1) You give her advance notice you're going to a concert with your friends. Not 'Can I go?' but 'I've made these plans 3 weeks from today. Love ya BUNCHES, and I'll be home as early as possible.'

2) I'm going to the couples thing you want me to go to this week, but you won't go to a concert with me? This is one sided. You're not being fair.
NOTE: Figure out how to say that nicer than I just did. Situations vary & I can't give you wording that will work in your situation.

YMMV.
Use one or both PRN.

MysticMichael · #5 07-30-2011, 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by martinmcfly

I gotta stop writing novel sized posts. Sorry.

Or at least throw in a carriage return once in awhile...

MM

Buslady7803 · #6 07-30-2011, 10:31 PM

I like metal.
Husband does not.

Husband surprises me saying that he'll go see Nightwish with me. My son too!

*faint*

So we're not really musically compatible but he compromises.

Joe Louvar · #7 07-30-2011, 10:33 PM

My wife loves music.

**Matthew_84** · #8 07-30-2011, 10:42 PM

Meh, it's never bugged me. When I've been driving lately I'm either listening to Rush, Motown, or Jamioquai, and when she drives she plays Lady Gaga. I kind of like that we have different tastes. She comes with me to some of my concerts and I go with her to some of hers. If not, then we go with friends.

Personally, I like having my own music which I enjoy because that's what I want to listen to. I don't want to force it on her, just like I wouldn't want Gaga forced onto me (that chick's pretty effin' gross).

winndaddy · #9 07-30-2011, 10:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Joe

Show some initiative in terms of planning and being positive about "her" stuff and then maybe she'll be more likely to go along with your stuff. If not, you'll have more ammo to get her to go/let you go alone if push comes to shove. I'm a firm believer that it's OK to have separate likes/interests/hobbies as long as they don't interfere with your lives together. Where that comfort zone is will be different from couple to couple.

Talk it out.

That said, I hate queen. Don't make me go either.

wHAT THIS GUY SAID!^

MakiSupaStar · #10 07-31-2011, 01:25 AM

Taking my wife and 7 year old boy to see the I-3, the mighty diamonds, toots and the maytals, and ziggy marley tomorrow. Reggae is a family thing in my house. I just wouldn't survive with a person doesn't have at least some musical taste that works with mine.

Lawkeeper · #11 07-31-2011, 01:38 AM

I guess I'm very lucky to have a girl with a musical style perfectly in tune with mine. Pun not intended.

Plus, she's a musical genius

Muddslide · #12 07-31-2011, 02:07 AM

My wife is a musician herself and back in the day played in a few bands, a couple of which did some pretty good-sized tours. She's played at some famous clubs I'd love to be able to say I'd been onstage at.

As far as musical tastes, she's not as rabid a music freak as I am. I like quite a bit of stuff that isn't her bag, but I like almost everything she likes.

The best part is that while she has no interest in playing live any more, she and I still record together on occasion and she is super-supportive of me playing. She's always nudging me to try and score some pice of gear I want or need and get back into playing with other people and gigging.

She's also gorgeous and bright and funny and kind.

Me lucky. Me happy.

drummer5359 · #13 07-31-2011, 02:52 AM

My girlfriend and I are not a perfect mach musically, but we are both pretty open minded and like to share different music experiences. She was in the radio business for over twenty years before we met.

Last week we went and saw U2 together. (Her idea.) We saw Dylan together last year although I wasn't keen on the idea at first. I've dragged her to see Jeff Beck & Eric Clapton together, Galactic and other shows over the years, not to mention drum shows and clinics several states away.

At night when we are sitting across from each other with our headphones on at our computers, we both listen to totally different music. If we stumble upon something new or that we find particularly cool, we share it with the other.

These are all examples of give and take. We enjoy being each other, and each appreciate being with someone else who takes music seriously, even if that means having different tastes.

Etchbass · #14 07-31-2011, 03:05 AM

I would say this isn't an issue, because you are talking about free tribute bands that show up weekly.

pnut166 · #15 07-31-2011, 04:07 AM

I`m almost inclined to think this is some kind of joke. My wife`s been to see Godsmack and Tool, I`ve been to see ...Barry Manilow and the Gaither Family. That`s how marriage works.

hrodbert696 · #16 07-31-2011, 04:25 AM

My wife's usual response is "Well, go have fun!" Luckily one of my daughters shares my taste in music so we do daddy-daughter dates to concerts.

DonKartofflo · #17 07-31-2011, 05:09 AM

well first of all i liked queen but i def understand that some people hate them

they just polarize

well all i can tell is that my parents are both former grunge\alternatives, so they listened to stuff like nirvana and frank zappa. my mom now likes maroon 5 and my dad now likes tom waits^^ we never can turn on any other music than nirvana or the other old stuff cause thats the only thing that they both like and enjoy^^
if anyone dares to put on tom waits, my mom will start a war, the other way round its when she puts on maroon 5 : ]
i guess in a marriage, its all about making compromises n stuff

Jazz Ad · #18 07-31-2011, 05:12 AM

I prefer to go to concerts alone.
It doesn't bother me when she wants to go of course but still.

Rockmusician · #19 07-31-2011, 05:42 AM

My wife and I have very little in common when it comes to music. There are a few bands which we both like but not many. We have a deal that works pretty well. Every year, we go to one concert that she wants to see and one that I want to.

She is very supportive of what I do though.

My son and I like the same music so we go to a couple of concerts every year.

Gintaras · #20 07-31-2011, 06:07 AM

My wife is not a big jazz lover but does go to shows with me and usually dozes off. She says jazz makes her go to sleep. I gave her some jazz for her ipod so when she does have problems sleeping then she listens to it!! Works great....
She likes mainly classic rock but really open to just about anything which is really great.
She does play a little piano and mostly classical.

I also do stuff with her that I typically don't care for but we just like doing things together so it all works out.