Am I an Enabler?

ZonGuy · #1 03-20-2009, 09:46 AM

Noticed two dudes down in front last night.

Came in drunk already, downed a round of shots and beer plus a pitcher of beer in 15 minutes. high fived and then headed out the door to parts unknown.

We have had a lot of drunk driving accidents where the drunk guy in a pick-up survived and 1 or more innocent drivers got wiped out instantly.

My conscience is twinging me this morning.

Absentia · #2 03-20-2009, 09:49 AM

Don't take responsibility for someone elses mistakes.

BigOldHarry · #3 03-20-2009, 09:49 AM

Uh... did you give these guys drinks, or did the bar serve them?

Bars, by nature, are "enablers". In theory, a bartender will cut a guy off if he appears to be a hazard to himself or to others, but we know how THAT goes. I know of *several* times where I should have been cut off and wasn't - I had to live to tell before I learned that skill all on my own.

Don't let this bug you. It's the world we live in. You play the music, they come to drink and listen - period.

dnarock · #4 03-20-2009, 09:51 AM

nah dont be hard on yourself . Drunks go to the bar regardless if your band is their or not . Its not your falt. were there bands playin befor the other accedents ? proly not so dont blame yourself and dont let things like that get you down .

ErebusBass · #5 03-20-2009, 09:53 AM

I don't know what you mean by enabler.

You didn't help them get drunk, they did that on their own. I don't think you encouraged them to get that drunk, and you sure as hell didn't tell them to drive home wasted.

What could you have done?

I guess you could have told the bartender to take his keys, but you were on stage?

It's nice to see someone with a conscience, but relax.

lousybassplayer · #6 03-20-2009, 11:33 AM

Well if you play Classic country numbers by Merle Haggard, David Allen Coe, Any of the Hanks or George Jones and were swilling JD from the bottle the whole time, you might not have helped the situation, but otherwise, these guys would have been there or under an overpass drinking T-Bird if thet felt like it. There is very little you can do to influence people. Ever.

baalroo · #7 03-20-2009, 12:31 PM

it's all your fault

lousybassplayer · #8 03-20-2009, 12:33 PM

That's nice

maybe next time you will be the one who sees two drunks and develops a complex over it. Where will you turn then?

TheDarkReaver · #9 03-20-2009, 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lousybassplayer

That's nice

maybe next time you will be the one who sees two drunks and develops a complex over it. Where will you turn then?

To the bottom of a bottle of course

rockinrayduke · #10 03-20-2009, 01:31 PM

This thread makes me thirsty.

funkometer · #11 03-20-2009, 01:36 PM

The government keeps it legal, its their fault!

sarcastro83 · #12 03-20-2009, 02:00 PM

I hear things like "you're an enabler" coming from people who need someone to blame for their own jackassery way too often.

BigOldHarry · #13 03-20-2009, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rockinrayduke

This thread makes me thirsty.

No kidding - me too...

Shot & a beer please!

babebambi · #14 03-20-2009, 02:15 PM

you are not the enabler
... unless ...

your music is so bad that they can't stand your playing when sober

take it easy my friend

Warwick9969 · #15 03-20-2009, 02:23 PM

well...if you played bass, real good, say to yourself that they had a nice night before being crashed up violently in a car and probably breaking their necks n making them suffer...they were drunk anyways...they didnt suffer that much...

they decided to drive drunk...their fault

Jim Campbell · #16 03-20-2009, 03:30 PM

i love it when drunks do something stupid then blame some bar maid .......

overdrivethree · #17 03-20-2009, 10:48 PM

you weren't enabling. i see where you're coming from, as part of the atmosphere of the place or whatever. but no.

you want to talk an enabler...how about the time i'd downed several pitchers of dark lager with a couple buddies, and the bartender insisted we all do a shot of tequila before he closed down. now i was pretty toasted from drinking so much beer (pretty much on an empty stomach), and wanted to resume the beer swilling back at my friend's place. i told him no, i needed a break before we went home.

but the bartender got all "what, are you a *****? be a man, do a ******* shot!" in my inebriated state, i let the guy get the better of me, and did it so i didn't look like a pansy.

and of course, i blacked out 15 minutes later. i really don't remember what happened the rest of that night, or how i woke up the next day. i vomited somewhere, i know that much. situations like that make me wonder how me or my buddies haven't pulled a Bonham yet. i'd like to beat that bartender's a** for that, but that bar shut down anyway (HA HA).

lousybassplayer · #18 03-21-2009, 09:23 AM

Enabling is a myth. Personal responsibilty is key. That means you are responsible for not pouring booze down a guys throat and then handing him the keys to his car, but thats where it stops IMO. It their own doing and you can't do anything about it.

Now lets go do some car bombs, ya pansy!

xgator4u · #19 03-21-2009, 02:25 PM

No you are NOT an enabler, no more than the manufacturer of the vehicle he drove off in was. If those cats have a wreck, and God forbid someone lost their life, Ford or Chevy or whatever is NOT to blame for some A$$HAT and his behavior. relax man, there is nothing you can do to control your audience.

My name is Mudd · #20 03-21-2009, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by overdrivethree

...but that bar shut down anyway (HA HA).

Gee, I wonder why?