Another Audition Rant (long)

sevenyearsdown · #1 10-01-2009, 05:52 AM

Our drummer is departing us soon to move on to bigger and better things in a different state. The break is totally smooth, and we wish him all the best.....and so starts the audition process.

The guitar player and I come up with a 4 song list for the auditions - 1 straight blues tune, 1 straight rockabilly tune, 1 Cash tune, and an original that has a swing feel to it. We figured between the four selections anyone interested in drumming for us would be able to find a comfort zone with one of them. Our plan was do the 4 songs with a guy, then just jam for a while and see what happens (play for an hour to an hour and a half).

The first guy to contact us came down last night. He was a lot older than us, but we kept an open mind (figuring a more seasoned player would have no problem knocking the stuff out). First, he was one of these guys that has a bigger and better version of anything you are talking about (music or otherwise). Second, he didn't even bother to learn the songs we sent him (on mp3). Third - he kept time like a broken coo-coo clock.

It's not the first time I've seen this, but I just don't get why someone would show interest enough in someone else's gig to audition......then not even somewhat prepare themselves.

Luckily we have 3 other people interested.

end rant.

bassbully · #2 10-01-2009, 07:38 AM

Dont you love auditions! You get all kinds. I really feel anytime you get someone who has not learned the song you asked them to you should stop and say "Thanks"... but "No thanks" I know its hard to do but ..what are they thinking?

You ask them to come prepared and knowing a few songs. This is to make the audition easier on them and you and they still cant arrive prepared? I am like you and have seen it myself and say

Why? It is interesting thou. When i have had an auditions i came in knowing what song the bands had asked me to learn cold. Why wouldnt I if I want to get the gig? Since I am fairly new to getting back to music only about 7 years ago maybe that is why i have never not been offered the job on any audition i have went to? Knowing the songs that were asked of me to perform....gee ...who would of thunk

sevenyearsdown · #3 10-01-2009, 07:49 AM

Guy just rubbed the wrong way in every apsect. When we were done he made some statement like, "Yeah, I play a little bass too. I could tell what you were doing there. You were playing some major and minor scales. I was watching your hands."

Geeee, what a profound statement on bass playing.

NEXT!

lousybassplayer · #4 10-01-2009, 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bassbully

:

When i have had an auditions i came in knowing what song the bands had asked me to learn cold. Why wouldnt I if I want to get the gig? Since I am fairly new to getting back to music only about 7 years ago maybe that is why i have never not been offered the job on any audition i have went to?

Agreed. I am in a similar boat with getting back into music, and I am an unknown in the music scene in this area but I have done about 4 auditions since I have been playing in the area. When I had to learn covers, I nailed them. At one the guitar player said "Wow! He knows the actual bass line" and I had to correct him on song structures of tunes THEY told me they were playing. In original situations, I came with at least the structure memorized and a basic part to play. Obviously when you are playing a song you have never heard before you got an mp3 of it with the guy who wrote it, it ain't gonna be perfect in a few days, but you gotta have something. Every one I have auditioned with was pretty happy with my level of preparation, generally in a short period of time. If a mediocre musician such as myself can do it, anyone claiming to be a player should be able to as well. Besides all that, word of mouth will catch up to you.

electracoyote · #5 10-01-2009, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sevenyearsdown

he didn't even bother to learn the songs we sent him

Epic Fail, and Total Waste Of Time (aside from educational purposes and insight).

I just got hired after an audition process for a really good country band in my area, playing most of the lead guitar. I know some good players auditioned for this band, and I didn't think they'd hire me. Later, it was disclosed the reason I got the job is: I TOOK THE TIME TO LEARN THE SONGS! Most of the other candidates noodled, overplayed, and didn't know the simple chord progressions. Evidently, being unprepared is a trend among lazy and egotistical musicians, and the silver lining is, now you are certain beyond a doubt that drummer would never have worked out.

You gotta clean a lot of oysters to find a pearl.

lousybassplayer · #6 10-01-2009, 11:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by electracoyote

You gotta clean a lot of oysters to find a pearl.

This is not the analogy I was thinking of, but its much nicer.

HailCorduroy · #7 10-01-2009, 12:34 PM

Drummer auditions are the best! We are still looking for a permanent drummer and have had a few possibilities that just didn't pan out. One guy I sent a few songs to and he said he had been practicing with them for a week before the audition. He said he wasn't sure he'd be able to play them fast enough (we play punk). I just told him to do his best. Guitarist starts the song, I join in w/ the bassline and then he kicks in. Playing half time. We stopped and I showed him the beat and he struggled for 3 or 4 minutes and finally he got it and was playing the right beat. We started playing the song before he could lose it. Then came the point where there's a quick snare fill. Train wreck. Random beats and cymbals are crashing. It sounded like he tripped over the stool and fell on top of the set.

So we switch to one of our slower songs. I start it out on bass and he joins in, once again playing half time. I was thinking we were going to try out some doom metal or something. I stop and tell him the beat is just a standard 8th note triplet beat and to play the snare on my accented notes. I hit the first note (not the accented one) and POP, he hits the snare. I said no, on the accented and played the line HEAVILY accenting the right notes. Got it? Good...First note...POP. I tried beating the rhythm on my chest, my bass, everything. I ended up standing there pointing to his foot and hand to show him when to hit the drums. I was going to be nice and just tell him we'd let him know because we had others trying out, but our singer just got fed up and told him we needed someone a little more ready to play. The "drummer" responsed w/ "You're kicking me out?" I was like, "you were never IN"!

We have one guy that we tried to schedule an audition for 3 weeks and couldn't ever find a day that would work for him and us. Doesn't bode well for practice or shows. Another one was like "Let's set up an audition time. I just got out of jail and need to get my s**t together." We have an audition booked this Sunday with another guy, so hopefully he can play so we can stop this madness.

Stumbo · #8 10-01-2009, 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by electracoyote

Most of the other candidates noodled, overplayed, and didn't know the simple chord progressions.

That's because they don't know what business they're in.

They don't get it that they're not in the noodling, overplaying, ignorant musician business. Okay, maybe THEY are but they don't realize that organized, gigging band are not.

As Dr. Phil says, you can't change what you don't acknowledge.

sevenyearsdown · #9 10-01-2009, 12:48 PM

The guy also had an emacualte set with bags and cases for every little piece (including the legs for his floor tom). He took all day to unpack an setup, which gave me an early impression that he didn't really do this too much. Most drummers I've played with that have it together can setup and tear down quicker than I can for a bass rig.

CharlieDog · #10 10-01-2009, 11:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sevenyearsdown

"Yeah, I play a little bass too. I could tell what you were doing there. You were playing some major and minor scales. I was watching your hands."

Sigged.

**jmattbassplaya** · #11 10-02-2009, 12:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HailCorduroy

The "drummer" responsed w/ "You're kicking me out?" I was like, "you were never IN"!
.

Haha, I had a drummer say the exact same thing at an audition once.

In high school I was in a speed metal(think Racer X) band with a guitar friend of mine and we were auditioning drummers. For this one guy we decided to start off with Nightrain by GnR just as a warm up tune before we got into actual speed stuff. By the end of this one song he was drenched in sweat and was asking for water and a break. My friend and I just looked at each other and were like 'what`s the matter with him?' We talked to him for a minute and he said we were playing too fast

He then went on to say that Slash is mostly well known for being a slow, smooth, melodic player, and not for being a rocker

Needless to say he didn`t make the cut. When he was packing up and we told him he wasn`t our guy he responded with the infamous line, "You`re kicking me out?" We got a good chuckle about that after he had left.

sevenyearsdown · #12 10-02-2009, 05:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CharlieDog

Sigged.

sevenyearsdown · #13 10-02-2009, 05:19 AM

Since we're telling audition stories here.

Years ago when I was a lad I played in this psychobilly/punk kind of band. I was sort of "the man" in the band. I wrote the guitar, bass, lyrics, etc. I also sang - we sucked btw. I had literally been playing for about a year and a half. Lots of attitude to compensate for lack of skill.

Anyway we were auditioning guitarists, and this one guy came highly recommended. He was kind of a big deal among the local punk scene. We were suppose to be excited that could get this guy. I was actually playing the 6-string to teach him the songs. I started playing this lick that was a simplified rip off of something like Hot Rod Lincoln (remember I've been playing stringed instruments for less than 2 years). I got one of strangest looks back from the guy I've ever gotten playing music. He looked at me kind of wide eyed and confused, then looked down at this picking hand the same way. Long story short - he only knew how to play power chords, and couldn't pick or chord at all. I lol'd and then told all is friends that thought he was great how much of tool he was.

I'll never forget all these poeple saying crap like, "Dude, you guys aren't gonna go with Jimmy"? Uh, no...Jimmy can't play his guitar.

lousybassplayer · #14 10-02-2009, 09:40 AM

I had a reverse of that happen once. A band I was in was auditioning a guitar player who was well known etc etc in the area. We already had a guitar player, but we wanted to fill it out. He shows up and sets up his ratty guitar gear, but spots my bass. "Dude, can I play that a little?"

Five minutes later I was packing my stuff.

bassbully · #15 10-02-2009, 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sevenyearsdown

Since we're telling audition stories here.

Years ago when I was a lad I played in this psychobilly/punk kind of band. I was sort of "the man" in the band. I wrote the guitar, bass, lyrics, etc. I also sang - we sucked btw. I had literally been playing for about a year and a half. Lots of attitude to compensate for lack of skill.

Anyway we were auditioning guitarists, and this one guy came highly recommended. He was kind of a big deal among the local punk scene. We were suppose to be excited that could get this guy. I was actually playing the 6-string to teach him the songs. I started playing this lick that was a simplified rip off of something like Hot Rod Lincoln (remember I've been playing stringed instruments for less than 2 years). I got one of strangest looks back from the guy I've ever gotten playing music. He looked at me kind of wide eyed and confused, then looked down at this picking hand the same way. Long story short - he only knew how to play power chords, and couldn't pick or chord at all. I lol'd and then told all is friends that thought he was great how much of tool he was.

I'll never forget all these poeple saying crap like, "Dude, you guys aren't gonna go with Jimmy"? Uh, no...Jimmy can't play his guitar.

Great story and while i understand it allot of punk guitar players know nothing more than power and barre chords since its all the play.In punk they didnt need it. I played with guys like that years ago and they could rip on punk songs...couldnt pick or play a G chord to save their lives.

lousybassplayer · #16 10-02-2009, 09:57 AM

Hey, G is a tough one!

bassbully · #17 10-02-2009, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lousybassplayer

Hey, G is a tough one!

Well Ya it takes a few fingers

NickInMesa · #18 10-04-2009, 10:39 PM

I posted this one in a thread of its own:

Portrait of a guitard thread

Basically we have to deliver one first and last gig with my drummer to make his lady happy (she has a Halloween party and we are to play there) and I already promised I would play, and I am a man of his word. After that I will move on to new projects and who knows, one day...

The guitarist moved out of State as well, unexpectedly, and that's why we have to audition.

I told the drummer to hire someone for $100 + beer + food and he would probably find a seasoned guitarist who knows all the songs and would nail them. His cousin is also a guitarist and plays in a good cover band, but has a previous engagement that day.

Anyway, we had to audition the husband of a friend of my drummer's wife, who "has guitars" and that pretty much sums it up. I wasted 2 perfectly good hours of my time trying to make sense. Ultimate guitard. I would expect that 90% of guitars out there belong to idiots who shred random crap with no idea of what music is really about.

So yes, I hear you. Good musicians can be hard to fine. I am not talking about studio sharks or guys who have played with a nice list of big names, but hobbyists like us who are at least TRYING.

40 years old, I still take lessons.

busmandan · #19 10-05-2009, 07:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sevenyearsdown

It's not the first time I've seen this, but I just don't get why someone would show interest enough in someone else's gig to audition......then not even somewhat prepare themselves.

I've auditioned pretty much every instrument imaginable, and I can tell you that this is standard behavior for drummers. To most of them, "preparing" means they listened to the songs in the car on the way over.

I've auditioned so many drummers that I can usually tell how well they're going to play by watching them set up their kit.

-- Dan --

FeuerFrei · #20 10-05-2009, 12:03 PM

I had a strange one, I went to an audition, only one member of the "band" was there, he and I meshed, and I thought all was well, we ended up just yapping about geek stuff ect. for longer than anything.

So I have this thing where I have a job and am slightly allergic to MJ, gives me a headache in quantity, and thus, I asked that the Pot not be smoked in the same room as me, you wanna get high, get high as a you want, not my brain but please not in the same room, I did not think that an unreasonable request.

His drummer, who I never met, supposedly stated that he didn't want to "change the way he practices". So basically, if he couldn't rip on the bong while at the drums, it was going to work. Mind you, these two were almost in their 40s, not like a couple of teenagers.

I thought that was crap on a epic scale, I don't care if you smoke, but show a little courtesy, and I figured they'd be alright with this, as the singer, is allergic to cigarettes (!).

I moved on, but seeing this brought that back to my mind, oh yeah, I still see their ads on CL still looking for a burnout bassist.