Baaaaad Bass Joke...

[Jostein]

A young bass player I know discovered -- as he was entering the stage -- that someone, who thought his tuning pegs were out of order, had "helped" him line them up straight.

Btw, my favorite drummer joke:
A drummer got so depressed after being fired from the band for dragging the tempo that he went out and threw himself behind a train.

[dangerkirk]

Q: what do you call a bassist with no band or girlfriend?

A: Homeless

the bass guy at my local shop told me that one

[crazyguy832]

I posted that on the last page... and that's actually a drummer joke.

Stupid lazy bassists can't come up with their own jokes.

<_<

Well... it's a little different...

>_>

*backs off slowly*

[D.Don]

Q - What´s the difference between a female lead singer and a terrorist?

A - You can negotiate with a terrorist.

One night, a lounge piano player pulls over the singer and says, "Now tonight we'll try a special version of this song: after five and a half measures of intro you come in with the second verse a minor third up, go to the bridge after 11 bars, twice modulate a half step down and halfway in the last A-section you start the tag, but a tritone lower. Are you ready? One, two,..." "Hell, wait!" the singer interrupts. "I'll never be able to do this!" The pianist replies, "But you nailed it last night!"



D.Don

[TheXym]

Q: What's the difference between a female lead singer and a piranha?

A: Lipstick


Q: What's got three legs and a prick?

A: An drum stool

[Ach]

A bassist and a drummer fired from the band for bad tempo feeling and decided to commit a suicide jumping off the cliff. "So let's jump after i count upto 3, ok?" - a drummer said, "ok" - a bass player answered.

"One, Two, Three"... ... ... *SPLAT*... ... ...*SPLAT*

[zachbass02]

Q: how does a Nashville bass player count 7/4?

A: one, two, three, four, five, six, sev - en...

[roberthelpus]

I told the OP's joke to a fellow bass player last night, and apparently I can tell a joke. She got real concerned about the poor kid that was being strangled. It was pretty late and she was tired.

[Petethebassman]

Originally Posted by Jeff K

My drummer and I used to hit each other with drummer and bassist jokes. Of course I can't remember any of the bassist jokes . But here's an old classic:

Q. How can you tell when there's a drummer at your door?
A. He's knocking too fast.

There's also a singer version of this:

Q: How can you tell when there's a singer at your door?
A: He can't find the key and comes in at the wrong time.

[bevel19]

Not really a joke, but try this out next time someone asks what instrument you play.

"Oh I play sub-guitar" and check out the look on their faces as they try to work it out.