Bad soap opera plots in your band

[pklima]

Does band drama ever just make you laugh because it's exactly like the absurd plot of some low-budget soap opera made in Brazil?

A good friend of many of the people in one of my bands has been hitting on one of the singers. Shortly after she rejected his advances, he proceeded to tell both her and the other singer after a gig (separately) that each one of them sounds great but that they don't sound good together.

The singers discussed this, with the flute player (who also does some vocals) leaving the room and slamming the door. One singer told the other that she should take some time off from gigging and only join the band for rehearsals for a while. Of course the second singer then quit on the spot. The flute player also decided she isn't going to sing anymore, and suddenly decided to start taking saxophone lessons. She's the one who's into medieval dance music and stuff, but it turns out she's had a saxophone collecting dust in a drawer all these years!

Maybe I should be worried or saddened by all this, but really it's so absurd I can't help laughing at it. The spurned lover pitting women against each other yet inexplicably still remains on friendly terms with the band, then the totally unexpected sax coming out of nowhere... talk about hackneyed plot twists! And stuff like this actually happens in real life!

[DaveyDeathKill]

Well, last week my evil half brother murdered our lead singer to get to her fathers fortune, only to find out that he was his father, and he had killed his own sister.

But than he learned how to sing and became our new singer, so it all turned out all right. Not really like a soap opera, but I think its a nice story.

[Gopherbassist]

Davey, I've had that happen twice this month.

[Spinal Tapper]

Ha - not in my band.

This is why I don't play with girls...

[pasta4lnch]

Originally Posted by pklima

Does band drama ever just make you laugh because it's exactly like the absurd plot of some low-budget soap opera made in Brazil?

that's my cup-o-tea as I've been writing music for the soaps for years

I just left a band w/ too much drama - really annoying.

[SomeKindofRobot]

This isn't as extreme as the OP but this happened pretty recently.

We always had problems with our rhythm guitarist. He would would often miss practice, never learn his part, nor would he really even play the guitar besides right before a gig. It would be nice if he could shred when he did or understood what playing in key meant, but that wasn't the case either. Definitely one of those who just likes the idea of being in a band but really doesn't want to put in any work. We really only tolerated him since he was a socialite and could get us gigs and was really good friends with our drummer. Plus finding a reliable replacement proved to be tough.

Anyway, eventually he quit our band, without telling us of course, to join another band his close friends were in. These guys were already a full, gigging band and really didn't need another guitarist. Especially one of his 'talents'. Eventually somehow after showing up at every one of their shows, supporting, promoting, as well as sitting in on their rehearsals, he was able to weasel his way in. They decided they'd take him on as a bassist, which meant out with the current bassist.

I found all this out one day when I got a call from our drummer asking if I'd like to play rhythm guitar instead of bass for our band. Jokingly I'm like, "Yeah dude. For sure, just buy me a new guitar, halfstack, some pedals, and I'm in." Turns out he was friends with the bass player of the other band as well and he wanted me to switch up to rhythm guitar to let him play in ours. I understand where he was coming from and all but I've already invested into the current gear I had. Of course all this was happening while the other bass player had no idea he got the boot. He found out after talking to our lead guitarist on facebook when he asked him if he was really going to join our band since he didn't have one anymore. Bass player was all "wut?" called his ex-bandmates and they were like "...yah".

To top all this off a week and a half later I get a call from this guy. Turns out he ripped the input jack out of the bass he bought after stepping on the cable at practice and wanted to borrow my bass for his show that friday. He just spent a grip on bass gear since he never even played bass before and couldn't afford to get it fixed. I was stunned. All I could say was... I don't think that's gonna work out...

So here we are out a guitarist so we took a little hiatus until we found another one. That's when our vocalist decided he was going to visit his gf for two weeks who lives in Seattle. That was two months ago and we haven't heard from him since.

Anyway that's my little band drama.

[KrisH]

Long term Peyton Place, starting 25 years ago:

My good friend, a drummer, and I headed up a well established four piece act, doing clubs and top-40 circuit, that had a good regional reputation and play schedule. Guitarist decided to quit to join the Navy, so we contacted another guitarist we'd all worked with in the past. He was interested, but had recently married, and his new wife was a drummer. He'd come in if she could join. Our drummer was also our lead singer, and he wanted to do more front work, so we agreed.

Things went well for a while as a five piece, but the husband-wife combo began double-teaming eveyone else in the band for more control over direction, etc. Nerves frayed and tensions rose, and after a year and a half or so, we all decided it was best to separate and go off to our own projects. After the last gig, the guitarist and his wife wished us well and asked what we were going to call ourselves. Then they whipped out the notice from the state saying the name of the band had been registered -- in their names! So they took the name from us, and the other guitarist, who was going to come along with us, changed his mind at that point.

The drummer friend and I found another guitarist and within a month were out on the same circuit as a trio, using the same name adding a "II" at the end. The others had decided to do "cruises" like, to GTMO and thereabouts. Still, after a few months we received a cease and desist order, but it didn't matter then, because we'd already established ourselves, and so we chose a cool new name. The others came off the "cruises" and tried to get back into the old circuits, but their reputation preceded them. After six months, they approached us and wanted to know if we'd want to buy the old name back for $50, but we said no. They ended up changing their name, a couple people, and started all over again from scratch.

It doesn't end there, though. By some chance, they managed to buy the rights to the name of an old 60s vocal group that was still touring on the "nostalgia" circuit. (Mostly everyone here would know the band and has heard some of its songs.) They ended up kicking out the last remaining original member, and went out performing as the recording artists. There were lawsuits and a congressional hearing, where the original members testified that they could not even perform under their old name when they were inducted into the Hall of Fame! The couple was always looking to replace backing musicians, too. I would have nothing to do with them, but my best friend from high school did a few stints with them. Ultimately, I got out of the business, and the drummer ended up joining the vocal group as one of the front singers (and is still there). The husband/wife team lost a lawsuit and got out of the business, and the name reverted back to one of the original members.

And everyone lived happily ever after.

[billhilly66]

Too funny. I was on a house gig for several years in WY and between the band's drama and the regulars and staff at the club, we started referring to it as weekly episodes of "As the Boot Scoots". Our own private, live soap.

[Yango]

Originally Posted by SomeKindofRobot

This isn't as extreme as the OP but this happened pretty recently.

We always had problems with our rhythm guitarist. He would would often miss practice, never learn his part, nor would he really even play the guitar besides right before a gig. It would be nice if he could shred when he did or understood what playing in key meant, but that wasn't the case either. Definitely one of those who just likes the idea of being in a band but really doesn't want to put in any work. We really only tolerated him since he was a socialite and could get us gigs and was really good friends with our drummer. Plus finding a reliable replacement proved to be tough.

Anyway, eventually he quit our band, without telling us of course, to join another band his close friends were in. These guys were already a full, gigging band and really didn't need another guitarist. Especially one of his 'talents'. Eventually somehow after showing up at every one of their shows, supporting, promoting, as well as sitting in on their rehearsals, he was able to weasel his way in. They decided they'd take him on as a bassist, which meant out with the current bassist.

I found all this out one day when I got a call from our drummer asking if I'd like to play rhythm guitar instead of bass for our band. Jokingly I'm like, "Yeah dude. For sure, just buy me a new guitar, halfstack, some pedals, and I'm in." Turns out he was friends with the bass player of the other band as well and he wanted me to switch up to rhythm guitar to let him play in ours. I understand where he was coming from and all but I've already invested into the current gear I had. Of course all this was happening while the other bass player had no idea he got the boot. He found out after talking to our lead guitarist on facebook when he asked him if he was really going to join our band since he didn't have one anymore. Bass player was all "wut?" called his ex-bandmates and they were like "...yah".

To top all this off a week and a half later I get a call from this guy. Turns out he ripped the input jack out of the bass he bought after stepping on the cable at practice and wanted to borrow my bass for his show that friday. He just spent a grip on bass gear since he never even played bass before and couldn't afford to get it fixed. I was stunned. All I could say was... I don't think that's gonna work out...

So here we are out a guitarist so we took a little hiatus until we found another one. That's when our vocalist decided he was going to visit his gf for two weeks who lives in Seattle. That was two months ago and we haven't heard from him since.

Anyway that's my little band drama.

Most memorable part: "wut?", "yah".

The rest: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[pklima]

Originally Posted by KrisH

And everyone lived happily ever after.

Wow. Yeah, that's got all the elements of a terrible soap plot, and bonus points for things escalating all the way to congressional hearings!

[bound'n'blocked]

As to the stories here involving married/dating/just humping between male and female band members, I've been there and done that to the point I have a standing rule that I wont violate under any circumstances.

I DONT PLAY IN A BAND WHERE TWO PEOPLE ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH EACH OTHER!

Three times I've been burned on this and I wont bend now. Thing is, our singers wife is SMOKIN' HOT and can sing, but I feel that if there is a couple in the band their vote counts as a vote and a half pretty much all the time.

BnB

[kcole4001]

My last band:
The singer and backup singer/soundguy (really BAD soundguy) both plotted to squeeze the drummer out of the band and keep the rest of the lineup.

This went over like a fart in an airlock, because the guitar player and the drummer both own the PA, lighting gear, truck, and have been playing together almost exclusively for nearly 30 years, not to mention that they are best friends!

Not gonna happen!

The band has since regrouped with new singers after I quit because life is too short for that kind of crap, and the other guys were too polite to say anything.

[lowfreq33]

Originally Posted by billhilly66

Too funny. I was on a house gig for several years in WY and between the band's drama and the regulars and staff at the club, we started referring to it as weekly episodes of "As the Boot Scoots". Our own private, live soap.

I'm totally stealing that.

[skidrawk]

Concerning drama - what happens in my band stays in my band.

[SMILEYSIXX]

Without really thinking the consequences of my actions through i started dating the girl who was singing in a band i played in. Awkward breakup and even more awkward jam sessions til the band broke up

[HugheJapackage]

A while back my guitarist's girlfriend cheated on him with the other guitarist and the keyboardist. Then after a long argument between the band, he decides to leave my gear outside(since it was in his house). After a near fist-fight we all work something out until the guitarist finds out about his cheating girlfriend a few months later.

[MatticusMania]

Originally Posted by pklima

Does band drama ever just make you laugh because it's exactly like the absurd plot of some low-budget soap opera made in Brazil?

YES! Ok, kinda long, but here goes...

So my band had just broken up, and as Im gathering some new musicians for a new project I decide to look for another band to join as well. I had just left my ex-wife and had a LOT of free time. I find this band on CL and we set up an audition.

I go to the audition deaf, dumb, and blind. The guy I had spoke with told me what they sounded like and who they were influenced by, but I had heard no recordings, been told what to be prepared for, or anything of the sort. To jump ahead to the drama... I got the gig that night and played with them for about a month.

It became apparent, not long after getting the gig, that the guitarist had a thing for the cute lead singer. I'll admit, I would have tapped it myself had things gone that way, but after getting out of my relationship with my ex was not really even interested in that sort of thing at the time. There would sometimes be some awkward tension between the two and they'd go outside to discuss whatever it was between them.
I had pieced this infatuation together, and my thoughts were confirmed by the drummer, who was friends with both of them.

Well, it all culminated to this: We were about to do some recording, get some professional photos done and the like, things were going good. Im chilling at home when I get a message from the singer saying she wants to quit. I ask whats up and she says she'll call me when she's off of work. She proceeds to tell me later: Guitarist & Her were supposed to meet up for a lyric writing session, she was tired from work & the gym and cancelled on him. He got mad, got drunk, drove to her house at 4am, calling her and leaving her nasty messages. She wasnt at home, her roommates were. She had stayed at a coworkers house to start work early the next day.

So, the band, minus guitarist, meet up to discuss the situation. She says that she won't play with the guitarist any more, at all, so we decide to give him the boot. Thats when he shows up at our practice space and is all 'Whats up guys'. He figured we would meet to talk and just showed up... REALLY awkward.

So I'm sitting there, the others are sitting there, the guitarist is standing there, and no one is saying anything, its been a few minutes and you could cut the tension with a knife, a dull one. I urge the singer to tell him whats up and it didnt go well. He kept asking 'Are you sure theres no way we can just put this behind us' and the answer from the singer was an adament 'No'. Over & over again...

[dazzzed78]

Not my band......But a friend's band......


So the bass player went and bought a car. His then live in girlfriend started driving the car as if it was her's (first mistake)after about a month she decided to leave him and take the car.(second mistake) he let her. Once his dad found out she had the car he drives him to take his car back. after a verbal argument with the ex he leaves with his car. Two weeks later at there band practice the lead singer walks in to practice with his new girlfriend. Guess Who? and after a 6 month courtship they are now married.

[MatticusMania]

Originally Posted by dazzzed78

Not my band......But a friend's band......


So the bass player went and bought a car. His then live in girlfriend started driving the car as if it was her's (first mistake)after about a month she decided to leave him and take the car.(second mistake) he let her. Once his dad found out she had the car he drives him to take his car back. after a verbal argument with the ex he leaves with his car. Two weeks later at there band practice the lead singer walks in to practice with his new old girlfriend. Guess Who? and after a 6 month courtship they are now married.

Is that about right?

[dazzzed78]

Originally Posted by MatticusMania

Is that about right?

That's It.