Best of Craigslist : BASS (humour)

Fetusyolk · #1 11-05-2008, 09:14 PM

Lookie what i found.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/11644109.html

this might be a good opportunity to post your personal finds as well.

undeadbass · #2 11-05-2008, 10:23 PM

Quite possibly the best thing I've ever seen!

Obe · #3 11-05-2008, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fetusyolk

Lookie what i found.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/11644109.html

this might be a good opportunity to post your personal finds as well.

I'll have to use some of those, take credit and hope nobody has read them, although I am guilty of a few...

We are looking for a drummer, so one of my "friends" sent this to me. Her name is off the guest list now.

http://westernmass.craigslist.org/muc/897717524.html
.
.

ErebusBass · #4 11-08-2008, 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Obe

I'll have to use some of those, take credit and hope nobody has read them, although I am guilty of a few...

We are looking for a drummer, so one of my "friends" sent this to me. Her name is off the guest list now.

http://westernmass.craigslist.org/muc/897717524.html
.
.

Wow... that guy sounds like a real winner.

fryBASS · #5 11-08-2008, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Obe

I'll have to use some of those, take credit and hope nobody has read them, although I am guilty of a few...

We are looking for a drummer, so one of my "friends" sent this to me. Her name is off the guest list now.

http://westernmass.craigslist.org/muc/897717524.html
.
.

AHAHAHAHA the best part is Andre the Giant

Honk'n_down-low · #6 11-08-2008, 10:07 PM

Funny!

Crazy Ivan · #7 11-08-2008, 10:27 PM

Playing loudly during warm up — $10
Sound-checking amp with funk slapping — $25
Writing note names over ledger-line notes — $50
Playing eighth notes — $5 each
Playing sixteenth notes — $10 each
Playing above 1st octave-immediate dismissal
Dragging fast tempo — $75
Dragging ballad tempo — $100
Blacking out during ballad — $200
Following drummer's tempo — $250

Checking hair between tunes — $15
Experimenting with odd meters — $25
Attempting last word on final chord — $50
Achieving last word on final chord — $100
Long gliss down to final note — $200

Forgetting strap — $10
Using electric tuner — $15
Bringing amp larger than 1 person can carry in 1 trip — $50
Bringing fretless bass — $500

Sitting behind drums on break — $10
Practicing scales during break — $25
Practicing — $150
Beginning a sentence with "When I was a guitar player" — $50

Continually shouting "Yeah!" — $25
Asking bone player where "1" is — $50

Guilty of all of these.

Bass_Bear · #8 11-09-2008, 10:33 AM

Now this is what I call shooting for the stars!

http://ottawa.en.craigslist.ca/muc/896133353.html

Looking for volunteers
Do you play any of these subsequently mentioned instruments? : Piano(honky tonk + classical), melotron, harpsichord, harmonica, sax(baritone+tenor), shaker {yes like a tin can with rice in it), spacey 70's synthesizer, guitar (including slide), foghorn, bass, tea kettle , tambourine, violin, cello.
Oh and can you sing , have a good sense of melody and rhythm.
And do you like Bowie? Cuz we're going to try playing Pin Ups in it's entirety.(I know, it's impossible)
You are probably thinking ...“ Those aren't even Bowie's own songs”..... So!
If you are male or female between 20 and 60 and are an idiot, cause this is doomed to fail, come along for the ride. We will eventually be playing this live in front of 17 indifferent hipsters we don't even know. (in Switzerland)

Obe · #9 11-09-2008, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fryBASS

AHAHAHAHA the best part is Andre the Giant

Hey Fry, I could give him a call and try him out, and if he doesn't want to be in a band dressed as old skool wrestlers (yes, skool with a "K"), I could send him down your way...I'm sure he would travel to Wethersfield, unless he got a DWI on the drive there!!

Mcfunkinstein · #10 11-09-2008, 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Obe

I'll have to use some of those, take credit and hope nobody has read them, although I am guilty of a few...

We are looking for a drummer, so one of my "friends" sent this to me. Her name is off the guest list now.

http://westernmass.craigslist.org/muc/897717524.html
.
.

when i saw the pic i wet my self slightly

he is scary

fryBASS · #11 11-09-2008, 04:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Obe

Hey Fry, I could give him a call and try him out, and if he doesn't want to be in a band dressed as old skool wrestlers (yes, skool with a "K"), I could send him down your way...I'm sure he would travel to Wethersfield, unless he got a DWI on the drive there!!

No thanks, My Chemical Romance really isn't my thing.

If he said he plays King Crimson or Primus, then maybe I'd be interested

Mcfunkinstein · #12 11-09-2008, 04:29 PM

http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/msg/906283178.html the bass in the top pics looks diff then the last pic im confused

Fetusyolk · #13 11-09-2008, 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mcfunkinstein

http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/msg/906283178.html the bass in the top pics looks diff then the last pic im confused

waaat

Mcfunkinstein · #14 11-09-2008, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fetusyolk

waaat

the fretboard is different too

tomvelsor · #15 11-09-2008, 04:48 PM

im guilty of about half of the fine list.

and i know that guy must be a great drummer, cause instead of posting MP3's, he posted his (quite nice) picture.

Ampeg SVT · #16 11-09-2008, 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mcfunkinstein

http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/msg/906283178.html the bass in the top pics looks diff then the last pic im confused

Its the same bass, one picture has flash and the rest dont, also the grain is the same.

Mcfunkinstein · #17 11-09-2008, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ampeg SVT

Its the same bass, one picture has flash and the rest dont, also the grain is the same.

hmmm how does the flash change it from red to yellow?

aurian4parker · #18 11-09-2008, 05:07 PM

My two favorites:

Practicing — $150
Beginning a sentence with "When I was a guitar player" — $50

Ampeg SVT · #19 11-09-2008, 05:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mcfunkinstein

hmmm how does the flash change it from red to yellow?

Its not yellow, its brown, the color of the wood, I owned one of those things.

One picture is darker than the other.

corrynthia · #20 11-09-2008, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fetusyolk

Lookie what i found.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/11644109.html

this might be a good opportunity to post your personal finds as well.

hilarious! not telling how many I’m actually guilty of, but one could be added for me – no fresh battery for tuner.

gonna change it to “guitar player offenses” and hand it out next rehearsal. i play with a guy who is guilty of every single one of these that applies to guitarists! most annoying: he plays while the md is trying to give direction.

thx for the laffs!