Broke up a band, accidentally.

MonkeyBass · #1 06-24-2011, 10:48 AM

A guy who I've known for ten years or so called me a few months ago to see if I'd be interested in playing in a 60's-era-only cover band. That kind of music if fun to listen to but I haven't played it much so I thought it might be fun.

The guy that was putting the band together is a good guy. I've heard him play and he's a decent musician so I figure it should be fun.

I went over to his house and played a few songs with him and the drummer. It seemed ok, not real tight, but it was the first day.

The next time I went over, there was a keyboard player there too. He had just sold his nice keyboard so he had this Casio keyboard that you'd give to a kid. Like, it was bright blue and sounded really bad. We played through a few tunes and the guitarist and keyboardist couldn't agree on the words, the chords, the form... It was a mess.

But I figured, it's the second day, it'll get better. It can't get worse.

Next thing I know, they book a gig. We have 6 weeks to learn 30 tunes so we can cover a few sets.

Flash forward to two weeks before the gig and nothing is better. Nobody but me is practicing. The chords haven't been worked out, the drummer can't land a fill on the beat, the words aren't learned... etc.

Just an aside: These guys were all born in the 50's, I was born in the 70's. They grew up with this music. Some of these tunes I'd just heard for the first time. I knew the songs better than they did.

So, I'm getting really frustrated and angry. As I'm packing up my car to leave my old friend that started the band said, "so what do you think?"

So, I told him, calmly, but frankly, "this is awful. Nobody's learning the songs, we can't get through a single tune without train-wrecking the whole thing. I can't do the gig. I'd be embarrassed to be on a stage with you guys."

He said that he was grateful for the honest answer and appreciated the feedback.

Two days later, the band broke up. It wasn't my intention to break up the band. I told them it just needed some more work and maybe some new personnel.

I guess I've learned sometimes it just isn't worth it.

Just thought I'd share this with my TB brothers and sisters.

Bassamatic · #2 06-24-2011, 10:51 AM

Kudos to you for being honest. It seems that the others also felt that way but couldn't bring themselves to confront their buddies.

Hope you find another gig soon.

rtslinger · #3 06-24-2011, 10:55 AM

You did the right thing for yourself and them

MonkeyBass · #4 06-24-2011, 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gio S

Kudos to you for being honest. It seems that the others also felt that way but couldn't bring themselves to confront their buddies.

Hope you find another gig soon.

I think you're right. I actually have other gigs which is maybe why I didn't really care if I said something. I didn't have anything to lose.

pbasswil · #5 06-24-2011, 11:00 AM

You didn't break up a band, you just broke up a fantasy. These guys sound like hobbyists at best; you sound like a pro. It was a bad match from the get-go. Don't feel bad, they'll still diddle around enjoyably in their spare time.

And you learned some new repertoire!

KenHR · #6 06-24-2011, 11:33 AM

Wow, this sounds eerily similar to the folkie band I left a month or so ago. Same deal: the other guys weren't practicing on their own, no discipline at rehearsals (we went over 2 months without adding a single song to our set!), etc. I did play a few gigs with them and they were always slapdash affairs. Toward the end I was pretty much soloing thru every song to keep myself interested, not that the other guys ever really noticed.

You did the right thing.

Munjibunga · #7 06-24-2011, 11:40 AM

You done good.

bassmonkeee · #8 06-24-2011, 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pbasswil

You didn't break up a band, you just broke up a fantasy. These guys sound like hobbyists at best; you sound like a pro. It was a bad match from the get-go. Don't feel bad, they'll still diddle around enjoyably in their spare time.

And you learned some new repertoire!

Yeah, this wasn't a band that you were breaking up. If they aren't learning the tunes, and can't play them, or even have proper gear, it's a bunch of dudes who are wanting to spend some time away from their wives--not a band.

Maybe you and the guitar player can try again in the future with a different drummer, and keyboard player. Maybe it'll go differently.

Why do the crappy "bands" always seem to get gigs so easily?

midijab · #9 06-24-2011, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bassmonkeee

Why do the crappy "bands" always seem to get gigs so easily?

Ain't that the truth!

ashtray · #10 06-24-2011, 01:28 PM

I have a bit of a history of breaking up bands. I'm not that great of a player or anything, but I think what I add is "glue". I've left a band that was good, and then they couldn't replace me and dissolved shortly afterwards. I left another band b/c I moved, and that band never had another practice. Now the current band I'm in, I'm "fading out" - as in I left the band, but I still talk with all the guys, and I come to the gigs, and I play a few songs on stage with them. It's been a gradual thing over the past 12 months. If I had just left "cold turkey", I'm afraid they would have folded - though just like the other bands, they all were very capable of going on without me!

MonkeyBass · #11 06-24-2011, 01:46 PM

Yeah it was pretty clear these guys were weekend warriors.

I'm glad to hear this isn't rare. I'm usually the one putting the band together so I've never walked into a situation like that before.

tdub0199 · #12 06-24-2011, 01:51 PM

You did the right thing bro...

plankspanker13 · #13 06-24-2011, 02:23 PM

You saved an unfortunate audience from a bad gig. So what, if you killed a fantasy. The pleasure of gigging should only be for those who put in the work to get good enough to do it well. Enough said.

AwkwardLoudness · #14 06-25-2011, 03:47 PM

It was prudent to give the band a chance, but you can only be patient for so long. I know the feeling.

duff beer · #15 06-25-2011, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MonkeyBass

Yeah it was pretty clear these guys were weekend warriors.

That's an insult to weekend warriors everywhere!!

I'm in a band of "weekend warriors"...every single member shows up to rehearsals already knowing their parts. The band members the OP mentioned aren't good enough to have reached weekend warrior status.

totallyfrozen · #16 06-25-2011, 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bassmonkeee

Why do the crappy "bands" always seem to get gigs so easily?

Lowest bidder?

MonkeyBass · #17 06-26-2011, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duff beer

That's an insult to weekend warriors everywhere!!

I'm in a band of "weekend warriors"...every single member shows up to rehearsals already knowing their parts. The band members the OP mentioned aren't good enough to have reached weekend warrior status.

This is true... I should have said "weekend-kids-at-the-local-strip-mall-taking-a-beginning-karate-class" because these guys were clearly not warriors. My apologies.

Jim Nazium · #18 06-27-2011, 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rtslinger

You did the right thing for yourself and them

+1
Looking back, I wish I had done this more often. I usually like being the reliable guy, the one that doesn't cause friction, etc. but I've stuck with some projects long after they should have been put out of their misery.

powderfinger · #19 06-27-2011, 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MonkeyBass

Yeah it was pretty clear these guys were weekend warriors.

I'm glad to hear this isn't rare. I'm usually the one putting the band together so I've never walked into a situation like that before.

Um, there IS a difference between a weekend warrior, and a group of grown men who sound like they just decided to pick up an instrument last week and start playing together, ya know?!

MonkeyBass · #20 06-27-2011, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Um, there IS a difference between a weekend warrior, and a group of grown men who sound like they just decided to pick up an instrument last week and start playing together, ya know?!

As I stated above:

"This is true... I should have said "weekend-kids-at-the-local-strip-mall-taking-a-beginning-karate-class" because these guys were clearly not warriors. My apologies."