Drummers Fiancé flipped out

[john turner]

Originally Posted by JimmyM

No you're not. Nobody who drinks triple soy lattes is badass.

it's true.

[Jeff K]

Originally Posted by john turner

i would tell the nob that you quitting had nothing to do with him, it had to do with the singer a) getting involved and b) siding with a nonband member over you, or even considering it.

she made her bed, now she can cry in it.

This is the bottom line in a nutshell. When talking to the dude, I would have probably accepted his apology rather than refuse to do so. But either way, the main reasons you will not be returning to the band are those cited by John in the above post. You don't need that kind of aggravation...

[The_D]

I have been accused of checking out my singers puppies on several occasions but then again... they are massive. She is banging the lead guitarist though and I have known her for years so wouldnt go there anyway. Nothing wrong with checking them out though.

[overdrivethree]

Originally Posted by JimmyM

So if any of you are with a yappy gal or guy who feels the need to interject themselves into band business, I strongly suggest you tell them to shut up before they say a word, and explain that nobody wants to hear from them. If they ask, that's one thing, but even then I wouldn't volunteer total honesty.

years ago, i drummed for a hardcore/metal kind of band. we played a show in a noisy gymnasium or someplace (one of those places where sound is simply an uphill battle, and you deal with it as best as you can). the singer's girlfriend was along. the whole time after the show, she complained how bad the sound was, you couldn't make out his vocals (all screaming, anyway), that nothing was "mixed" right, etc.

i distinctly remember this carrying over to the late after-show meal at Denny's. i leaned across the table and said "hey Yoko, when you learn to do sound, you can talk about it. we did the best we could, all right?"

singer was mad at me for a day. she actually got all Spinal Tap with me ("i'm saying it because i care!"). the guys in the band told me it was a d--k move, but still hilarious.

[JimmyM]

Originally Posted by overdrivethree

years ago, i drummed for a hardcore/metal kind of band. we played a show in a noisy gymnasium or someplace (one of those places where sound is simply an uphill battle, and you deal with it as best as you can). the singer's girlfriend was along. the whole time after the show, she complained how bad the sound was, you couldn't make out his vocals (all screaming, anyway), that nothing was "mixed" right, etc.

i distinctly remember this carrying over to the late after-show meal at Denny's. i leaned across the table and said "hey Yoko, when you learn to do sound, you can talk about it. we did the best we could, all right?"

singer was mad at me for a day. she actually got all Spinal Tap with me ("i'm saying it because i care!"). the guys in the band told me it was a d--k move, but still hilarious.

HAHAHA! The Y Word! Even 40 years later, nothing hits in the gut quite like calling her Yoko I don't blame you, dude. It was the right response.

[makanudo]

as someone said here, Sometimes people suck

[Fito Moreno]

Originally Posted by baalroo

Our drummer is female and sometimes I figure I probably look creepy when I realize I'm staring at her right leg (kick drum). To an outsider it surely looks like I'm staring at something else.

I actually have caught myself doing this. I think all drummers know that we look to them for directin when sound is not present.

I want to thank everyone for everything they've said as well as advice on how to handle the situation. Thank god for Bass players.