Go Back   TalkBass Forums > Bass Guitar Forums > Bass Guitar Forums > Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]
Register Rules/FAQ/CUP Members List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG] Bass jokes, musician jokes, gigs gone wrong...


Supporting Membership
Thank You

Latest Supporting Member
Donate to Upgrade Today

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #261  
Old 04-22-2012, 08:09 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Visalia CA
I'd love to hear what it sounds like, at least.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSUsousaphone View Post
It's not pedalphilia if the pedal wants to be touched.
Quote:
Originally Posted by behndy View Post
Pre-Emptive Woot Engaged.
Fuzzrocious #34 Mediocre Bassist #193
Schecter #60 (admin) Trace Elliot #167
  #262  
Old 04-24-2012, 10:04 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: alabama
Quote:
Originally Posted by g4string View Post
Dont know what he's compensating for though. His ad specifically states "Must be a guy, sorry ladies! thanks...." People be weird.
I think he`s looking for more than a music partner
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by *insertcoolname View Post
1nce at a gig i roxed the crowd so hArd that all teh gurlz were liek "i want u" an all teh bands were liek "u roxed evry1 2 hard" and i waz liek "yea i no cuz i am teh mastr uv base"
  #263  
Old 04-24-2012, 02:41 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Visalia CA
That's what I think also...he's being obtuse about it.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSUsousaphone View Post
It's not pedalphilia if the pedal wants to be touched.
Quote:
Originally Posted by behndy View Post
Pre-Emptive Woot Engaged.
Fuzzrocious #34 Mediocre Bassist #193
Schecter #60 (admin) Trace Elliot #167
  #264  
Old 04-24-2012, 02:47 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: East Oakland, California
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zoa View Post
fledgling hip-hop industry.
Sorry, I saw Grandmaster Flash, Whodini and Run DMC when I was in high school. I am 43.
Hip hop is over 25 years old, hardly fledgling. And at least since "The Chronic" it has been pretty much the dominant musical idiom.
Do you feel me?
__________________
Stingray club #90, Sterling club #90, EBMM club #102. Ovation Magnum club #1, Mesa Bass 400,400+ Club #14, Big Cabs Club #179, Mesa Boogie club #1317, Synth Pedals club #41
  #265  
Old 04-25-2012, 05:27 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: East Iowa
Ehhh... made me laugh here at work at around 5:30 am lol.

-----
Guitar and drummer looking for bass and vocaallllssss


Guitar and drummer looking for bass and vocaallllssss (hillsdale, il)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2012-04-16, 7:03PM CDT
Reply to: timesenemy1@yahoo.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


We got a guitarist and a drummer annnd no one else. huge huge large big enormous problem. we want to be an alternative indie whatever band. no country, its icky, no screamo, its ear shattering. maybe metal. we're cool with that. we are both the age of 17. we dont care how old you are, as long as youre not any age above yea. no rapists please. its happened before. we dont want that again. if interested, hit us up on the email or text 309-428-5336 oooorrrrrr 309-798-6668, yea, thats right, three 6's.

•Location: hillsdale, il
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 2962266154
  #266  
Old 04-25-2012, 08:24 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: New Jersey
Found this ad this morning

bass player needed

bass player wanted for meloncholly rock trio..must NOT be lactose intolerant. Must have extensive knowledge of the universe and all of its meaning. Must understand and appreciate under achieving as well. if this sounds cool email bob.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by ggoat!!! View Post
This thread smells fishier than the Lesbian Band Name thread...
  #267  
Old 04-26-2012, 12:25 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixpack324 View Post
Found this ad this morning

bass player needed

bass player wanted for meloncholly rock trio..must NOT be lactose intolerant. Must have extensive knowledge of the universe and all of its meaning. Must understand and appreciate under achieving as well. if this sounds cool email bob.
milk sniveling galacto-douche-nozzles need only apply
__________________
http://soundcloud.com/john-austin-mclaughlin/spynic
"A rolling Coprolite gathers no Sphagnum." Gazman
  #268  
Old 04-26-2012, 09:05 PM
g4string's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: McKinney, TX
Supporting Member
Bass player w/good stage presence personality premium bass gear FUNK - All I can say is watch the OP's youtube videos.
  #269  
Old 04-27-2012, 09:07 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
reposted for whatshisface


I'm starting a very specific-genre band. It involves a lot of screaming and/or showing off and/or the word "core" in the name, so you know I'm a serious musician. INfluences include the Doom-death-doomies, Nat King Cole, and the music from Yo Gabba Gabba. I have lots of experience with music as I just picked up the guitar yesterday. I'm looking for people between the age of 25 and 25.76 years old. NO OLDIES OR YOUG KIDS OUTISD ETHIS REANGE WILL BE CONSIDERED!!

I am in need of a bassist, a drummer, a tambourineist, a flugel horn player, a robot, and a slice of pizza. YOU WILL BE EXPECTED TO BEING YOU'RE OWN EQUIPMENT AND IT MUST BE OF PROFESSIONAL QUALITY! ANYONE WHO BRINGS A COMBO AMP OR AN INSTRUMENT THAT COSTS UNDER $600 WILL BE IMMEDIATELY ASKED TO LEAVE, AND I WILL CHARGE YOU MONEY FOR MY TIME!

You must be fully devoted to this band. Even though you don't know me and I don't know you, I will not consider people who are going to half-ass this. You will be expected to give me custody of your children as collateral and proof of your commitment to the band. NO DRAMA OR DRUGS OR EGOS OR PEOPLE BETTER THAN OR WORSE THAN ME!

You will be expected to be under my complete supervision and jurisdiction at all times at a band practice. You must only play what I tell you you can play, exactly when I tell you you can play it or YOUR WASTING MY TIME!

I look forward to reading your 10 page essay, detailing exactly why you deserve to be in my band. NO EGOS OR DRUGS OR CATS OR RAINBOWS OR GOLFERS OR CAB DRIVERS, PLEASE!

Peace
__________________
http://soundcloud.com/john-austin-mclaughlin/spynic
"A rolling Coprolite gathers no Sphagnum." Gazman
  #270  
Old 04-27-2012, 09:26 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Dallas, TX
Quote:
Originally Posted by g4string View Post
Bass player w/good stage presence personality premium bass gear FUNK - All I can say is watch the OP's youtube videos.
The CL ad is gone, but the videos are still available:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4iJP4sSuv0U
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uc4jJKPJSGk
__________________
Pedulla Club #136, VM Jaguar Club
  #271  
Old 04-27-2012, 09:46 AM
Marley's Ghost's Avatar
Registered Voter
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Delawhere
Supporting Member
^^^ LOL that covers about 95% of the douche ads in CL.
__________________
EBMM SR5 -> L6 G30 -> MB F500 -> MB NY604x2
  #272  
Old 04-27-2012, 10:06 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Visalia CA
Three things I got from those vids...

- I never knew Scott Bakula was a bassist...
- ...and has HORRIBLE taste in straps
- However, his sample in the 1st vid was/is one I'd like to have myself, tbh
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSUsousaphone View Post
It's not pedalphilia if the pedal wants to be touched.
Quote:
Originally Posted by behndy View Post
Pre-Emptive Woot Engaged.
Fuzzrocious #34 Mediocre Bassist #193
Schecter #60 (admin) Trace Elliot #167
  #273  
Old 04-27-2012, 12:51 PM
g4string's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: McKinney, TX
Supporting Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by INTP View Post
D-bag in the above videos just recently bought the bass he is playing (in those two videos), in what is quite possibly the two worst bass playing youtube video in planet earth. The guitar in question......$4000 See links below for the original for sale ad, followed by the original sale's ad youtube video demo. You can see the new owner, DoubleOfunk1, chime in with a comment about how he is new owner of the bass. DoubleOfunk1 is the d-bag in the two videos above. How does a guy with absolutely ZERO talent spend $4000 on a bass. Confusing.

Custom Watson 6 string headless fanned fret bass FS FT
WATSON GUITARS 6 String, Headless, Fanned Fret (Serial #08B024) - YouTube
  #274  
Old 04-27-2012, 01:02 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Charlotte
I'd say that guy is a TB member. Who else would have headless 6 string fan-fret, Bag End cabs, and a pedal board that looks like that.
__________________
Peavey Cirrus 5 (MIA), G&L L2500 (MIA), 1978 USA Fender Precision, Ampeg, GK
  #275  
Old 04-27-2012, 01:31 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Visalia CA
That name isn't coming up in a member search here.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSUsousaphone View Post
It's not pedalphilia if the pedal wants to be touched.
Quote:
Originally Posted by behndy View Post
Pre-Emptive Woot Engaged.
Fuzzrocious #34 Mediocre Bassist #193
Schecter #60 (admin) Trace Elliot #167
  #276  
Old 04-27-2012, 02:15 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Ft. Worth, Texas
Quote:
Originally Posted by viper4000 View Post
I'd say that guy is a TB member. Who else would have headless 6 string fan-fret, Bag End cabs, and a pedal board that looks like that.
Someone who lives with his mom and has no financial responsibilities.

That guy is also famous around here for putting all of his gear up for sale on Craigslist every couple of months.
__________________
Schroeder Club #58
5+ Basses Club #25
  #277  
Old 04-27-2012, 02:23 PM
g4string's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: McKinney, TX
Supporting Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by busmandan View Post
Someone who lives with his mom and has no financial responsibilities.

That guy is also famous around here for putting all of his gear up for sale on Craigslist every couple of months.
Not trying to sound too naive here.....but does this guy really live with his mother? From the outward appearance of your comment, it seems like you have personally ran into this guy. His youtube video def seemed kinda bedroomish...or studio apartmentish. The mom thing makes perfect sense.

Tell you what, if I had a 50 something year old sibling still living at home and they came home with a $4000 bass......OH MAN, I don't know what I would do. I can't fathom a response because I would be sooo pissed off. Hey maybe the guy is taking care of his elderly mother or something like that. If so, kudos. Maybe it's one of those weird mamma's boy relationships. Who knows. Either way, 50 something and still living at home is weird. I am sure given his current living situation (and awesome funk bass ability) he HAS to be a chic magnet.

Last edited by g4string : 04-27-2012 at 04:42 PM.
  #278  
Old 04-27-2012, 02:32 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Cork City, Ireland
Quote:
Originally Posted by LothrtheTerribl View Post
Hello, I am Uber Mensch. Read Nietzsche and you'll know what it means.

My experience has taught me that people who quote Nietzsche either:

A. Have never actually read Nietzsche but know that he was a "rebel" and have Googled a few of his quotes.

or

B. Have read some of his works, absolutely don't get them, but pick out a couple of bits and pieces that they think sound cool.

Kevin Kline's character in "A Fish Called Wanda" is the perfect personification of this special brand of douche nozzle.

Either this ad is indeed sharp satire, or it is the equivalent of a drunk girl standing on a chair in the middle of the room flashing her cans essentially screaming, "Hey, everybody, look at me!!!"
Agree I studied philosophy and I know Nietzsche fairly well...He is one of my favourites....But I don`t feel like running around quoting him haha
  #279  
Old 04-27-2012, 04:23 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: SF Bay Area
Quote:
Originally Posted by busmandan View Post
Someone who lives with his mom and has no financial responsibilities.

That guy is also famous around here for putting all of his gear up for sale on Craigslist every couple of months.
I was wondering how many thousands of dollars of gear I was looking at in those vids!
__________________
I woke up this morning and I got myself a.....BASS! Epif#30, G&L#407, Mediocre#113, Buddhist#21, OFBPOAC#81, OldBasstard#74, CalBass#90
  #280  
Old 04-27-2012, 04:38 PM
g4string's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: McKinney, TX
Supporting Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by rosanne View Post
I was wondering how many thousands of dollars of gear I was looking at in those vids!
At least $7500, if not more
Closed Thread


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Visit TalkBass on Facebook   Download our iOS app   Download our Android app

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:47 PM.




© 2012 Talk Music Group Inc. All rights reserved.
Play guitar too? Visit TalkGuitar.com
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.12
Copyright ©2000 - 2013, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.