Dumb Craig's List Ads pt.4: Dumber and Dumbest

[ErebusBass]

Whoops

[My name is Mudd]

Found another one (multiple pics)...same guy too (surprise!), and he wants how much for it? Maybe the street name is appropriate...

- http://losangeles.craigslist.org/wst...587609438.html -


Custom Wood Carved Electric Bass Guitar - $1200 (1541 Stoner Avenue)
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1541 Stoner Avenue

My Snake, Rattle, & Roll Bass. This solid body electric bass guitar has been custom carved with a Snake theme. I'm not sure what company originally manufactured this bass.

1541 Stoner Avenue

Location: 1541 Stoner Avenue
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Posting ID: 3587609438

Posted: 2013-02-01, 4:07PM PST

[catcauphonic]

Originally Posted by My name is Mudd

Found another one (multiple pics)...same guy too (surprise!), and he wants how much for it? Maybe the street name is appropriate...

- http://losangeles.craigslist.org/wst...587609438.html -


Custom Wood Carved Electric Bass Guitar - $1200 (1541 Stoner Avenue)
Powered by Leaflet — Terms

1541 Stoner Avenue

My Snake, Rattle, & Roll Bass. This solid body electric bass guitar has been custom carved with a Snake theme. I'm not sure what company originally manufactured this bass.

1541 Stoner Avenue

Location: 1541 Stoner Avenue
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Posting ID: 3587609438

Posted: 2013-02-01, 4:07PM PST

That's a really neat carving. I wonder how many of these customs he has, & how the h*ll you even go about doing something like that/those

LOVE this thread

[plankspanker13]

Riiiiiiiiiiiight:

http://phoenix.craigslist.org/nph/muc/3585968215.html

[Vince Klortho]

That's too funny. The electric tuba for punk rock music, you have to drive him around, and he brings a nasty little dog with him. Good luck with that !

[ErebusBass]

Originally Posted by catcauphonic

That's a really neat carving. I wonder how many of these customs he has, & how the h*ll you even go about doing something like that/those

LOVE this thread

From afar that snake looks VERY phallic.

[My name is Mudd]

Originally Posted by catcauphonic

...how the h*ll you even go about doing something like that/those...

A Dremel and a lot of cheap beer...?...

[DeadGoonz]

http://albany.craigslist.org/msg/3590429627.html

This is kinda funny.

[Stewie26]

Originally Posted by plankspanker13

Riiiiiiiiiiiight:

http://phoenix.craigslist.org/nph/muc/3585968215.html

That little dog looks scarier than the guy.

[Grateful]

Originally Posted by plankspanker13

Riiiiiiiiiiiight:

http://phoenix.craigslist.org/nph/muc/3585968215.html

I would think one wouldn't have to go looking for Punk Rock Tuba gigs, right?

[Joebarnes]

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/va...590641373.html

PUNK-AS-F**-MYSANTHROPIC-BLACK-NARCOTIC-EAT-THE-CHILDREN-METAL (The Drive)
Powered by Leaflet — TermsCommercial Drive at Broadway
...Imagine if Stza Crack joined Hypothermia but instead became a new version of Lifelover and wrote music after mandatory-forced-daily-doses of Hunter S. Thompson, Kurt Vonnegut Jr. & William Burroughs.... (...except, SOMETIMES -just to F*** with THEM- t.p.t.b would throw in a bit of William Cooper & David Icke too... s****'n'giggles y'kno...) ...HEAVILY esoteric....(under-the-)influenced by class-3 narcotics & left-hand-path help from-beyond-the-grave cultivated through daily human-sacrifice-rituals upon an unapologetic-alter fashioned from late-term-abortions and adorned with images of The Clash, NIRVANA, & MayheM....AND Claudio Sanchez, OF COURSE... (....do we have a f***ing problem???...thought so...)

...absolutely NO NOODLE-VIOLATIONS....EVER!!!...NO exceptions...EVER!!! ...technical-SHREDDER-douchebag-types probably shouldn't bother wasting their time, or MORE IMPORTANTLY MINE... ANY FEMALE who passionately gives-a-f***-about/influenced by: Stza-Sturgeon/ AND (...that's: *A-N-D* ) Lifelover/dsbm IS STRONGLY ENCOURAGED TO REPLY (...even if you don't play an instrument: I CAN TEACH YOU) ...that is, UNLESS YOU ARE A F***ING FATTY...I know...hold-on, hear me out: I have 100's of hours of professional studio experience including MAJOR-LABEL (**sell-out/no-integrity**) projects and the fact is that there is NO FUTURE FOR A FAT CHICK IN MUSIC.... get over it DAMMIT.... as a consolation prize, I've got a buddy who's number you might want... all better??? ...ok, good... If you ABSOLUTELY f***ing HATE HUMANS (...especially COPS...) AND (...that's: *A-N-D* ) think you have even a REMOTE chance at matching-wits-with-me: WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU WAITING FOR???

...JUNKIES ARE STRONGLY ENCOURAGED TO REPLY... but, if I EVER (...that's: *E-V-E-R* ) find out that you've been HOLDING-OUT on me: you're f***ing DONE, you junkie PIECE OF S***... NO EXCEPTIONS...EVER... (and it BETTER be good s*** TOO)

[My name is Mudd]

Nominated for 'Hardest Ad To Read' award up there ^. And why do I get the idea that it's not a joke ad?

[4001]

Long hair and tattoos....really important.
http://chicago.craigslist.org/chc/muc/3585810952.html

I am looking for a worthwhile band/project/studio sessions with a pro band. Preferably one that already is together and has gigs and just needs a bassist. All genres and styles welcome. I can play pickstyle or fingers. Ok at slap as well.

No part-timers or weekend warriors. I've got pro gear and a resume that would make most bassists extremely jealous.

I've work with everyone from Dethklok, Testament, Iced Earth, King Diamond, Anthrax, Dream Theater and many more.

I have a great attitude, no drugs, and will always show up on time and prepared. I'm also available for touring.

You can go here to view my recorded material. I have an entire albums worth for you to listen to at this location...

Let's rock!!!

Mod edit: quoted as the ads go away...

[60bass]

Originally Posted by Joebarnes

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/va...590641373.html

PUNK-AS-F**-MYSANTHROPIC-BLACK-NARCOTIC-EAT-THE-CHILDREN-METAL (The Drive)

<<< snip cause it's too painful to read the whole thing >>>

This ^ is your mind on drugs!

[neuralsnafu]

[quote=nomeX;13764034]In my quest for basses I stumbled upon this:


BEFORE YOU CLICK ***NSFW*** PICS

Using pretty nice-bodied lady to sell bass -


there was a bass in there???

right click, save as...

[catcauphonic]

Originally Posted by Joebarnes

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/va...590641373.html

PUNK-AS-F**-MYSANTHROPIC-BLACK-NARCOTIC-EAT-THE-CHILDREN-METAL (The Drive)
Powered by Leaflet — TermsCommercial Drive at Broadway
...Imagine if Stza Crack joined Hypothermia but instead became a new version of Lifelover and wrote music after mandatory-forced-daily-doses of Hunter S. Thompson, Kurt Vonnegut Jr. & William Burroughs.... (...except, SOMETIMES -just to F*** with THEM- t.p.t.b would throw in a bit of William Cooper & David Icke too... s****'n'giggles y'kno...) ...HEAVILY esoteric....(under-the-)influenced by class-3 narcotics & left-hand-path help from-beyond-the-grave cultivated through daily human-sacrifice-rituals upon an unapologetic-alter fashioned from late-term-abortions and adorned with images of The Clash, NIRVANA, & MayheM....AND Claudio Sanchez, OF COURSE... (....do we have a f***ing problem???...thought so...)

...absolutely NO NOODLE-VIOLATIONS....EVER!!!...NO exceptions...EVER!!! ...technical-SHREDDER-douchebag-types probably shouldn't bother wasting their time, or MORE IMPORTANTLY MINE... ANY FEMALE who passionately gives-a-f***-about/influenced by: Stza-Sturgeon/ AND (...that's: *A-N-D* ) Lifelover/dsbm IS STRONGLY ENCOURAGED TO REPLY (...even if you don't play an instrument: I CAN TEACH YOU) ...that is, UNLESS YOU ARE A F***ING FATTY...I know...hold-on, hear me out: I have 100's of hours of professional studio experience including MAJOR-LABEL (**sell-out/no-integrity**) projects and the fact is that there is NO FUTURE FOR A FAT CHICK IN MUSIC.... get over it DAMMIT.... as a consolation prize, I've got a buddy who's number you might want... all better??? ...ok, good... If you ABSOLUTELY f***ing HATE HUMANS (...especially COPS...) AND (...that's: *A-N-D* ) think you have even a REMOTE chance at matching-wits-with-me: WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU WAITING FOR???

...JUNKIES ARE STRONGLY ENCOURAGED TO REPLY... but, if I EVER (...that's: *E-V-E-R* ) find out that you've been HOLDING-OUT on me: you're f***ing DONE, you junkie PIECE OF S***... NO EXCEPTIONS...EVER... (and it BETTER be good s*** TOO)

Awesome that you copy & pasted this when you did cuz it's already been 'flagged for removal' He sounds totally serious, too!

[Joebarnes]

Originally Posted by catcauphonic

Awesome that you copy & pasted this when you did cuz it's already been 'flagged for removal' He sounds totally serious, too!

His email address is equally offensive, I'll just choose not to post it. But just wait... its back up, and there's more:

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/va...591832290.html

(aaaaw....dont take it personal baby-booo.... YES YOU!!!)
***ALL (INHERENTLY-EVIL)HUMANS PLEASE (*P-L-E-A-S-E*...see, I'm not ALL bad...) PAY ATTENTION***

...HERE'S THE MOST IMPORTANT PART:

...if you have the mental-fortitude to decipher the hidden message contained amongst the preceding body of text then PLEASE REPLY IMMEDIATELY,
----->and if not: just f*** off and die so I can eat your filthy, sobbing, bastard-children....



.........WOULD YOU LIKE FRIES WITH THAT, SIR???
..... HAVE A NICE DAY

[My name is Mudd]

...wow...someone who apparently actually takes GWAR seriously...

[TolerancEJ]

Wow, that nasty a$$ CL ad sort of makes me want to remove my city from my profile. Haha! What if one of those band members PM'd you to come & play with the band? What if you said "no" and perhaps there was retaliation on their part?

Originally Posted by My name is Mudd

...wow...someone who apparently actually takes GWAR seriously...

Except GWAR discloses the fact that they're just portraying characters. GWAR is legit... No idea what 'those guys' are thinking.

[My name is Mudd]

I wonder if this is an example of...


Wants to be...




...but actually is...