Favorite Quotes from 7 years of touring and recording:

pablomigraine · #1 05-13-2009, 09:05 AM

[Jeanne Sagan - ALL THAT REMAINS]:
"Youre the best bassist Ive ever seen....."

[Engineer at a Big Name Studio]:
"Youre the bass player? Great! Let me find an XLR cable and I'll just run a DI... you use a pick right?"

[Every engineer Ive ever worked with]:
"I'll just run a DI"

[Mike Schmidt - my old drummer]:
"You can just play ROOT NOTES over this part"

[Every drummer Ive ever worked with]:
"Whats with all that fast high note stuff? Just play some nice root notes over this..."

[Mike Lejeune - guitarist]:
"I dont care if its in the same scale, it takes attention away from the leads....."

[Every guitar player Ive ever worked with]:
"maybe you could turn down some....."

[My entire band, after a master went to press]:
"we asked the engineer to bring the volume down on your bass track without you present .......because we felt you might object..."

[Fan]: "there's something different about this new album... it sounds all thin and twangy... like there's no bottom end...did you guys mean for it to sound that way?

[Mike the drummer]
"We dont have enough lines to mic your cabinet tonight, we only have enough for the guitars, vocals, my kick, snare, toms and my crashes and overheads."

[Fans]:
"You sound amazing man! Is that an AMPEG!?!?!"

[FOH Engineer]:
"Whats all that stuff in your rack? Why not just use an AMPEG?

[Every audtion Ive ever been on]:
"hey man you're pretty good...can you play that CLIFF BURTON thing!?!?!"

[Fans]:
"you guys are the best band on this tour, you sound the most like METALLICA!"

[The band]:
"We'd rather dissolve the band permanently that have the press release describe us as 'Screamo'..."

[The Band]:
"Paul, we think it would be better to let US handle the bookings and tour arrangements from now on..."

[The band, 9 months later]:
"Paul, we need you to take over the bookings and tour arrangements ASAP"

THE BEST ONE EVER:

[Manager]:
"Okay guys, I thinks its time we all had a discussion about your WARDROBE.... now, the studio has given us these gift cards to HOT TOPIC, and I think you'd better use use them. Also, there's the issue of EYELINER......."

geeza · #2 05-13-2009, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pablomigraine

[My entire band, after a master went to press]:
"we asked the engineer to bring the volume down on your bass track without you present .......because we felt you might object..."

Wow. Deja Vu.

modbass · #3 05-13-2009, 10:03 AM

haha,

I just got the phone call from management last night about wardrobe. If you see a guy wearing a plaid blazer that'll be me.

Illbay · #4 05-13-2009, 10:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pablomigraine

[B[Manager]:
"Okay guys, I thinks its time we all had a discussion about your WARDROBE.... now, the studio has given us these gift cards to HOT TOPIC, and I think you'd better use use them. Also, there's the issue of EYELINER......."

Doesn't the drummer always get to wear sunglasses?

bassbully · #5 05-13-2009, 10:17 AM

LMAO Great post!

Mr. Pickles · #6 05-13-2009, 10:28 AM

LOL

I'll probably sig one of those...just not sure which one!

You have a tattoo of Tay Zonday?!?

MonkeyBass · #7 05-13-2009, 10:48 AM

How about these.

Monitor Mixer: "When you're done with your set move your sh*t off the stage and into the alley"

Stage Manager: "You can't have a beer on stage!" Then, after I got done pointing out all the other beers on stage, "You bring that on stage again, I'll kick your ass!" I managed to get the guy fired for that comment!

Me: "I have a looper pedal that needs a DI"
Stage flunky: "..."
Me: "That box that I can plug a 1/4" input into and you take an XLR on the other end."
Stage flunky: "..."
Me: "Just... move aside, I'll do it"

Singer/songwriter chick I played with for too long: "Can you turn it down? Your bass is louder than my piano"

Recording engineer at a studio in Boston: "I can never get a good recording from a bass with active pickups man."
Me: "Try some EQ"
Engineer: "It's all boomy and stuff... ugh"
So I EQ'd the board for him.

That's all I can think of right now.

pablomigraine · #8 05-13-2009, 10:59 AM

here's one I didnt include because it was more of a conversation than a quote, but some of you might find it lulzy:

Mike the Guitarist: "I like the new stuff youve added, but we really need you to turn down some, or just play a more basic line.."

Me: "okay fine I'll give it a shot" ..as I walk over and adjust my amp.

(after the song)

Me: "so was that any better?"

Drummer and both guitarists: "MUCH better!" ".... Thats the best Ive heard you sound yet!" " Whatever you did different that time, I liked it..."

Me: "Great!! Okay everybody... pay close attention to me now..." ( as I walk over to my rig and TURN MY AMP BACK ON after it being turned completely off for the whole song)

Greg the Singer: (laughs hysterically to the point of nearly choking...., drummer gets up and leaves in a fit of rage...)

Jimbob Jones · #9 05-13-2009, 11:07 AM

Awesome.

The favourite quote I've had is when my ex guitarist said "to be honest, I don't care about playing those very important stabs in time on that song, I'm too busy rocking out, so I just strum."

TheHegemon · #10 05-13-2009, 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pablomigraine

THE BEST ONE EVER:

[Manager]:
"Okay guys, I thinks its time we all had a discussion about your WARDROBE.... now, the studio has given us these gift cards to HOT TOPIC, and I think you'd better use use them. Also, there's the issue of EYELINER......."

BWahahahaha

TheVoiceless · #11 05-13-2009, 11:28 AM

Dude, The first one is a great one. Kudos on that one.

Why is it that people who are active musicians still have no clue about bass? For some reason if you play guitar you automatically must come with and ego and hate bass. The engineer quotes are good also.

I feel your pain.

MatticusMania · #12 05-13-2009, 03:38 PM

O' reality, what cruel beast you are!

Disappear · #13 05-13-2009, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pablomigraine

[Engineer at a Big Name Studio]:
"Youre the bass player? Great! Let me find an XLR cable and I'll just run a DI... you use a pick right?"

[Mike Schmidt - my old drummer]:
"You can just play ROOT NOTES over this part"

[Every drummer Ive ever worked with]:
"Whats with all that fast high note stuff? Just play some nice root notes over this..."

[Every guitar player Ive ever worked with]:
"maybe you could turn down some....."

[Mike the drummer]
"We dont have enough lines to mic your cabinet tonight, we only have enough for the guitars, vocals, my kick, snare, toms and my crashes and overheads."

[Fans]:
"you guys are the best band on this tour, you sound the most like METALLICA!"

[The band]:
"We'd rather dissolve the band permanently that have the press release describe us as 'Screamo'..."

*Headdesk*

two fingers · #14 05-13-2009, 04:46 PM

Ha! Great post. HOWEVER...it sounds like a LOT of people around you are saying that your bass lines are too busy. Never having heard you play, do you think there may be even a LITTLE truth to it? Again...I'm only going by the number of people YOU listed in your quotes. There seems to be a lot of people who think you should play (oh...I don't know) BASS NOTES? I'm NOT trolling! Just making an observation.

Implosion · #15 05-14-2009, 05:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by two fingers

Ha! Great post. HOWEVER...it sounds like a LOT of people around you are saying that your bass lines are too busy. Never having heard you play, do you think there may be even a LITTLE truth to it? Again...I'm only going by the number of people YOU listed in your quotes. There seems to be a lot of people who think you should play (oh...I don't know) BASS NOTES? I'm NOT trolling! Just making an observation.

It's metal, not classic rock.

EddiePlaysBass · #16 05-14-2009, 05:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by two fingers

Ha! Great post. HOWEVER...it sounds like a LOT of people around you are saying that your bass lines are too busy. Never having heard you play, do you think there may be even a LITTLE truth to it? Again...I'm only going by the number of people YOU listed in your quotes. There seems to be a lot of people who think you should play (oh...I don't know) BASS NOTES? I'm NOT trolling! Just making an observation.

Your mileage may vary, but I have noticed that as soon as a bassist does more than play the root, he's marked as a "busy player." For some reason everyone wants bass to go dum-dum-da-dum. Same people who claim bass is boring

pablomigraine · #17 05-14-2009, 06:18 AM

My Favorite Talkbass quote of 2009:

Quote:

Originally Posted by two fingers

Ha! Great post. HOWEVER...it sounds like a LOT of people around you are saying that your bass lines are too busy. Never having heard you play, do you think there may be even a LITTLE truth to it? Again...I'm only going by the number of people YOU listed in your quotes. There seems to be a lot of people who think you should play (oh...I don't know) BASS NOTES? I'm NOT trolling! Just making an observation.

Disappear · #18 05-14-2009, 07:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by two fingers

Ha! Great post. HOWEVER...it sounds like a LOT of people around you are saying that your bass lines are too busy. Never having heard you play, do you think there may be even a LITTLE truth to it? Again...I'm only going by the number of people YOU listed in your quotes. There seems to be a lot of people who think you should play (oh...I don't know) BASS NOTES? I'm NOT trolling! Just making an observation.

He's not asking for your observations. Just shut up, read the thread over again and laugh at what they said.

The Owl · #19 05-14-2009, 09:10 AM

Classic stuff!!!

Of course, there's the inevitable: "Man, why don't you play a Fender?"

MonkeyBass · #20 05-14-2009, 11:06 AM

Thought of a few more.

I was on tour in LA a few years ago and a very famous drummer from a very famous band was at our gig. He came up to me after the show and was looking at my Warwick 5-String Thumb bass and said "I didn't even know they made a 5-string bass." Innocent comment but I was amazed that in all the years in the business, all the places he's played, all the musicians he's met... he never saw a 5-string bass.

I'm sure this one is all over the upright bass player's threads... but, every time I play upright bass someone, somewhere, calls it a cello.

I was playing in a high-paying, professional pit orchestra once. It was the 2nd rehearsal and I was still learning the book. So, during one of the scenes on stage, I was scribbling notes to myself in the book. The theatre director, who was hovering over the top of the pit, stops the scene and tells me to quit writing because it's distracting her. I ignored her.