Guitar player surfaces, gets gear back, I get in trouble

Axtman · #1 02-15-2011, 10:13 PM

Long story short our guitar player at church completely disappeared for 8 months. Read all about it here: Guitar player vanishes, rig for sale cheap

Anyhow our worship leader got sick of trying to contact him and finally decided to sell the gear that he left behind. At practice she was frustrated about how she was going to give away or sell his gear. Since I buy and sell equipment I volunteered to help her sell it (big mistake). (Note to self: Never let other people's problems become your problem.)

So I take the equipment home after practice. I start looking up prices on the internet. The whole time I have this gut feeling that I am doing something wrong. As much as I would like to dump his gear in the ocean, it is not my gear to sell. Also I have his gear at my house without his permission which looks like I stole his stuff.

I email the worship leader and tell her that I estimate the gear is worth conservatively $1500. I also tell her that I am feeling guilty about this and ask her if I should try to contact the guitar player one last time. She responds that I should NOT contact the guitar player and if I am feeling nervous that I should just bring the gear back to her.

I search the internet for him with no luck. How can you return something to someone that can't be found. I remember that he has a facebook page so I check it. He has not updated anything in a while but there is a phone number and e-mail. I call the phone and find it disconnected. So I send him a FB message and e-mail. I expected to not hear from him but wanted a clear conscience that I tried to get a hold of him.

The next morning I get a response to the FB message I sent. He wants his gear back anytime today and left a phone number. I also get a message on my phone from the worship leader saying how disappointed she is in me and how I betrayed her trust. I call the guitar player and he comes by and picks up his equipment. At practice before church the worship leader balls me out in front of the band.

Am I missing something here? Didn't I take the "higher road" and do the right thing?

Bulltrout · #2 02-15-2011, 10:20 PM

I fail to see how returning someones personal property can, in any way, be seen as doing the wrong thing. I am sure that if the roles we're reversed that you would appreciate someone doing a little extra to get your gear back to you rather than selling it and that alone should tell you that you did the better thing.

Hawaii Islander · #3 02-15-2011, 10:22 PM

You did the right thing. Seems like your band leader could have done the same thing. I think she was in the wrong on this one.

OneMoreRobot · #4 02-15-2011, 10:25 PM

I'd say you did the right thing. That doesn't seem to get noticed much, but at least you have a clear conscience.

fusoid · #5 02-15-2011, 10:33 PM

Sounds like your worship leader should perhaps refresh herself on some of the basic tenets of her faith.

Axtman · #6 02-15-2011, 10:34 PM

I have been rolling this over in my mind and suspect that she wanted to give him a tongue lashing and/or teach him a lesson. Neither of which support Christian values. The other thought is that she has "already spent the money". I know that she had planned to buy a better drum set for the church. So I basically foiled her plans.

I was extremely relieved when the guitar player picked up his stuff. Though I still think he is a jerk. He probably did not want to deal with her and was relieved when I took his stuff.

I just knew that if I tried to sell his stuff that I would be asked questions I could not answer and it would draw suspicion on me. I would be the one who could get into serious trouble for trying to hock "stolen" goods.

Had I not heard from the guitar player the next day, I would have returned the equipment to the church and washed my hands of it.

trowaclown · #7 02-15-2011, 10:38 PM

Shame on you for your self doubt! You did the right thing by going the extra mile for someone who probably doesn't deserve it, when you didn't have to, and that's something to be proud of.

Mjury02 · #8 02-15-2011, 10:39 PM

Does anyone else find it hilarious/sad that it was a worship leader that was so gung ho about sellin the equipment?

Axtman · #9 02-15-2011, 10:41 PM

I am going to take a break from playing at church for a while and re-evaluate whether I should continue being involved in this charade of Christianity.

If it weren't that I would let down the band I would have packed up and left on the spot right before service. But I am a professional and that is not the right thing to do.

It is too bad that I get paid for playing at church, otherwise I would walk. I am now wondering if I am whoring myself.

Axtman · #10 02-15-2011, 10:42 PM

Okay here is something else that is sad and depressing. She teaches classes on anger management and conflict resolution.

salcott · #11 02-15-2011, 10:47 PM

Take the money and profit from the lesson learned. Morals and ethics exist independently from religious belief. You obviously have good morals and solid ethics; what do you need the religion for?

UncleFluffy · #12 02-15-2011, 10:47 PM

#8 and #10, isn't it?

FWIW I think you did the right thing, too.

C.Linton · #13 02-15-2011, 10:48 PM

Legally speaking, I believe after eight months with no contact from the guitar player, his equipment would be considered abandoned and the church leader would have every legal right to get rid of it however she would see fit. BUT, I agree with this %100 -

Quote:

Originally Posted by trowaclown

Shame on you for your self doubt! You did the right thing by going the extra mile for someone who probably doesn't deserve it, when you didn't have to, and that's something to be proud of.

Your church leader should just shut up and learn how to be a better christian from you, it sounds like you have a better grasp on it than she does.

fusoid · #14 02-15-2011, 10:49 PM

"I am going to take a break from playing at church for a while and re-evaluate whether I should continue being involved in this charade of Christianity. "

As a Buddhist, I would say that any faith is only as good as the person who is practicing it. Just follow your own heart, and be mindful of how you can be helpful to others. Christianity is fine, it's the people with the problems....

**Rune Bivrin** · #15 02-15-2011, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Axtman

I am going to take a break from playing at church for a while and re-evaluate whether I should continue being involved in this charade of Christianity.

If it weren't that I would let down the band I would have packed up and left on the spot right before service. But I am a professional and that is not the right thing to do.

It is too bad that I get paid for playing at church, otherwise I would walk. I am now wondering if I am whoring myself.

I would say it's your worship leader that's doing the whoring.
Things like this just confirm to me that faith and religion have very little naturally in common.
What you did was the right thing. You followed your conscience. Kudos for that!

bmason81 · #16 02-15-2011, 10:54 PM

Religious people are often intolerant.

Dave in LB · #17 02-15-2011, 10:59 PM

Axtman- I'm not sure how your church government works but here's what needs to happen now, and it sucks. You need to have a conversation with an elder or two and or the head of the Christian ed/music commitee and let them know this is what happened. they need to be aware that this leader potential caused an issue for you and the church. If Flakey the guitarist decided to press charges or take someone to small claims I think the church would want to know in advance what transpired. Also they need to be aware of the poor choice(s) the "worship leader" made/makes. In my church we would go straight to the session (ruling elders), and they would deal with it...hopefully.

I recently found myself in a similar situation at work with my boss and my choices needed to be better, namely I needed to go to his boss.

Now for her personally. Try to forgive her for the failings of her flesh and move on. This is another reason though I no longer attend a church with worship bands. Too much distraction from the real reason to be in God's house on sabboth.

GBY!

turbo2256b · #18 02-15-2011, 11:03 PM

I would dump the church. If she dosent teach / read verse for verse from the Bible and proper referances I would have been long gone. You did right in my book.

Musicmaster75 · #19 02-15-2011, 11:03 PM

Gratz on doing the right thing ! For your effort ya got a slot saved for ya in heven and well, for the leader...

Smell that BBQ

phatbass · #20 02-15-2011, 11:07 PM

You did the right thing. As an outsider (agnostic) the worship leader's attitude and actions seem to be the antithesis of what I know of the teachings of Christianity.