How we gained and lost our number #1 fan in one night!!

jonas_24112 · #1 12-05-2011, 10:10 AM

I booked my cover band at a local private club of which I happen to be a member (think Moose Club, only more biker friendly!!) last Friday night. Anywhoo.....

We get through our first set and go to see the wives during the set break when this "lady" starts screaming a the top of her lungs....HUUUURRRYYYYYY UUUUUPPPPPPPP.....over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, etc., etc., etc...So, we make jokes that she's our new #1 fan and wants us to play NOW!!

Well, her and her boyfriend are totally plastered and out of their minds. He's holding her up in the chair and doing quite a bit of groping of her at the same time (did I mention they both look to be in their 60's?) They managed to get to the dance floor and dance to a few of the break songs and she starts hollering and crowing like a rooster. We point out their shenanigans to a couple of the trustees and then let them be.

Now the second set starts, and she and her beau stagger around the dance floor. I noticed her boyfriend dragged our rhythm guitarists girlfriend onto the floor. That poor girl is way too nice!! Then the woman starts dancing with another guy and her beau gets jealous, so they start yelling at each other. So, the bouncers pull them to the side and give them a talking to.

We take our second break. Lead guitarists wife is livid. She says if the old SOB comes onto her again, she's gonna beat the crap out of him. The "lady" asks my wife, "didn't you used to date my son." The couple get in another argument about "I'll dance with anybody I want to." The "lady" tries to grab me to dance when I'm heading back to the stage for round 3.

Final set....our drummer has a schtick where he gets a bunch of female "backup singers" out of the crowd up on stage for Mustang Sally. So, we load the stage up with our wives & gf's and tear into ole Sally. The "lady" proceeds to stand in front of the stage and start calling all the backup singers a whole string of profanities I can't write on here. Anyways, it's at that time I've had enough. I walked to the side of the stage and motioned for security to throw her out and she was removed.

So that's how we gained and lost our #1 fan in the same night.

Luv2Pla4U · #2 12-05-2011, 10:17 AM

That's the price you pay for being as good as you are...lol

MatticusMania · #3 12-05-2011, 10:19 AM

Ridiculous drunk women dont a number one fan make.

NKUSigEp · #4 12-05-2011, 10:24 AM

You can't underestimate the power of "Mustang Sally". Consider it a lesson learned and be more cautious next time you play it!

Lee H · #5 12-05-2011, 10:33 AM

I have too many years experience at being a bar bouncer...it is always the drunk women that cause the most problems

SBassman · #6 12-05-2011, 11:27 AM

I continue to be amazed at behavior in bars - by older women.
I have many stories to tell, but I'll spare you all.

Yup - the drunkards Did need the boot.

Steve · #7 12-05-2011, 11:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jonas_24112

. I walked to the side of the stage and motioned for security to throw her out and she was removed.

It seems as though we've been over run with wanna be Snookies as well lately.

SBassman · #8 12-05-2011, 12:03 PM

I have teenage daughters who wanted to go see Snookie when she was appearing at a local mall. I absolutely refused. I became the enemy that day - a very old fart to my daughters.

I didn't even think they knew who she was. Turns out they were watching that crap.

Made me very, very sad.

Yes - out at the bars, we now have an army of Snookies. There are an awful lot of older women feeling very comfortable these days with acting like total a**es out in public after having 10 drinks too many. And then the way women dance these days - with each other - don't get me started. It will eventually chase me from gigging.

My future musical life is probably going to take the form of - playing to play-along tracks.

Freaky Fender · #9 12-05-2011, 12:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SBassman

I have teenage daughters who wanted to go see Snookie when she was appearing at a local mall. I absolutely refused. I became the enemy that day - a very old fart to my daughters.

I didn't even think they knew who she was. Turns out they were watching that crap.

PARENTING: You're doing it right.

SBassman · #10 12-05-2011, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NKUSigEp

You can't underestimate the power of "Mustang Sally".

Yes - the magic continues. It still never fails. And we don't even offer it up. We play it when it is requested. And - it's always Big. Pretty amazing.

We have about 5 tunes that still cause these Big responses - cheering, dancing. While I'm playing them, I'm wondering if these people just climbed out from under a rock.

How do these tunes generate such enthusiasm?

SBassman · #11 12-05-2011, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Freaky Fender

PARENTING: You're doing it right.

Thank you. It usually doesn't feel that way, and, it's never easy.

As time passes, I don't feel wiser about parenting. I actually feel more clueless. A tough job, for sure.

**bassman314** · #12 12-05-2011, 12:19 PM

Fan of the Year: 2010 | DEER PARK AVENUE

That was our "FAN OF THE YEAR" winner...

The guy was INSANE. We were booked for a 2-night stint at a bar/Grill that had a postage stamp for a stage. we did 3 45-50 minute sets. Lots of fun. A good mix of covers and originals.

It was a cold and dreary night, and it was dumping like crazy. So we were playing a cover of some kind, when this guy walks by, walking his dog. IN THE RAIN. He looks through the glass and starts to rock out.. IN THE RAIN.

He ties his dog to a bench (at least the poor pup was out of the rain now), takes his jacket off and stows it next to the dog and proceeds to enter.

At this point, we realize that he is either drunk, stoned, high on Meth, or some combination of all three. He is going crazy!!! He's dancing, and literally screaming along with the music. We were playing some 80's and 90's covers, but he was screaming and dancing like we were doing hardcore covers of said songs. At one point, he licked the guitar of or frontlady... I was a bit concerned that I was going to have to stick a boot in his, well.. Anyway...

At some point, he goes to the bar, and I think they kicked him out, because he started to leave. The bar was up a coupleof steps from the area we were playing at, and it had a guard rail and a wheel chair ramp. Instead of either walking down the ram, or the stairs, he climbs OVER the guard rail, and falls onto a chair below. He stands up, and shakes himself off, and is about to leave.

Well... Earlier, he put his lighter on stage, and had left it there when he went to the bar. Our guitarist/vocalist (who is a quite attractive female) yells out to him "YOU FORGOT YOUR LIGHTER!!!"

His response? "NO THANKS, I'm GAY!!!"

dmusic148 · #13 12-05-2011, 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bassman314

...... Our guitarist/vocalist (who is a quite attractive female) yells out to him "YOU FORGOT YOUR LIGHTER!!!"

His response? "NO THANKS, I'm GAY!!!"

THAT is absolutely classic.

Lee H · #14 12-05-2011, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SBassman

I continue to be amazed at behavior in bars - by older women.
I have many stories to tell, but I'll spare you all.

Yup - the drunkards Did need the boot.

just try being the guy who has to put those drunk women out of the bar. You cannot just wad them up, and throw them out, so you have to try to talk them out the door. We know that drunks do not handle reason well, so it can often be difficult

Vakmere · #15 12-07-2011, 10:47 AM

So glad I'm out of the business. Nothing over the years changes other than the faces.

bassman1185 · #16 12-07-2011, 11:08 AM

Kind of reminds me of a gig that my old hardcore/metal band did.

We were on first, I believe, and Des Moines has an all-ages curfew at bars of 9pm, which means shows usually start around 5:30 or 6, so this was taking place at maybe 6:30pm. We play a couple of songs, and then we notice a pocket beginning to form in the crowd.

About 12 feet out from the stage, a woman who looks like she had spent too much time on the business end of a crack pipe (Or maybe meth; Iowa has a pretty significant issue with methamphetamine) is wiggling around in some sort of misguided attempt to be sexy. Saying she was writhing would be giving her too much credit. She wasn't graceful enough to writhe. Did I mention that she had some pretty significant signs of heavy drug use?

We finish the song, and she starts screaming enthusiastically. We play our next song. The screaming and "dancing" continued. Our lead singer commented on our new #1 fan and how hot she was. We play our next song. She starts taking off her shirt.

I had to turn my back to keep from laughing/puking. When I turned around, I saw a bouncer "escorting" her to the door.

jimc · #17 12-07-2011, 11:25 AM

I just started subbing for a classic rock covers band.

Seems that Don't Stop Believing has become the rock equivalent of Mustang Sally!

punkinfantry · #18 12-07-2011, 11:29 AM

drunk chicks are a species all their own, man.

SBassman · #19 12-07-2011, 05:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimc

I just started subbing for a classic rock covers band.

Seems that Don't Stop Believing has become the rock equivalent of Mustang Sally!

That's a big tune for us too.

robbotbass · #20 12-07-2011, 05:39 PM

We played a biker rally at the lake one year. I know your story all to well. I bet there where 40 "ladies" there and maybe 15 bra between them.