My sister in law took my basses!

NickInMesa · #1 12-07-2010, 09:50 PM

So where have I been for more than a month?

Well, things went South at home over the last few months and soon to be ex wife and I decided to get the big D.

Except that she changed her mind, for different reasons (won't get into details, I know she reads this forum, hey, honey!)

So I served her, instead of filing jointly, which means of course having to hire an expensive attorney, having to borrow money from relatives, etc... And getting ready for a wiiiild ride.

But the fun part is that one night coming home (we had agreed I would live in what was my dedicated practice pad at the time -it was not that bad, included TV and mini-fridge, plus of course my computer, amps and basses) I found that all my musical instruments, pedal boards and practice amp had disappeared.

The funnier part: I had hidden a spycam to look after my belongings when I was gone. And it filmed everything. I am not sure I will ever share this with other people than relatives and close friends.

But, believe me, you'd laugh at the video, because it shows my sister in law taking away my instruments. I'd love to go into details, but my lawyer would kill me. I'd laugh at the video if I was not appalled and of course understandably pissed off.

And yes, it was against court order, and yes the purpose was indeed to upset me. Uh, yes, it worked, but I kept my calm. It's not worth a restraining order.

So I am basically bassless for the moment.

I've not played in a bit more than a month, but that's fine, I spent the time rearranging things, moving to a new place, and fighting crazy allegations that were thrown at me as a response to my filing.

Seems that I am going to get the parenting time I was asking for, and that I will be able to see my kids and spend time with them, and that's more important than music.

At one time I will get back into playing music again and maybe find a band that's ok with my bizarre divorced dad schedule.

I would love to show the video. But I'm not sure I can. You have to take my word for it. It makes for great entertainment.

So, I'm back. How have you guys been?

kesslari · #2 12-07-2010, 09:56 PM

Have you filed charges?

**jmattbassplaya** · #3 12-07-2010, 09:59 PM

I'd delete this thread. No reason to give her a heads up.

NickInMesa · #4 12-07-2010, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kesslari

Have you filed charges?

No. I could. But I don't think we will.

Yes, I could file charges. But you need to remember: you have a defined set of goals in a case, and adding to it does not make it simpler to achieve these goals.

So, yes, what was done was in violation with a court order. I could include some details that would bother you even more, but seriously, as long as I get the basses back eventually, and reach the goals I want to reach in the divorce, I'll be fine.

If the basses are in bad shape, yeah, there's going to be some retribution. But if they come back in one piece, no damage, that's all I want.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmattbassplaya

I'd delete this thread. No reason to give her a heads up.

No need, the evidence has been disclosed to the other party. I wanted to write about this when it happened but did not due to the fact I did not want to give a heads up.

lunarpollen · #5 12-07-2010, 10:00 PM

Holy crap! I hope you get your gear back ASAP in perfect shape!!

Indiana Mike · #6 12-07-2010, 10:02 PM

Divorce sucks ... but you'll get through it ... keep your head on straight and move forward.... I did it two years ago and have few regrets . I'm 42 , have a wonderful GF and three kids that i have more than my ex ( but I still pay support???) I plan to never marry again ... Its a contract to give someone half your sh*t

I hope you get all your gear back . I assume she broke a law or two?
I really hope you get it back in the same condition.

Tell me she knows you busted her? She must feel like a dum*ss about now.

NickInMesa · #7 12-07-2010, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Indiana Mike

Divorce sucks ... but you'll get through it ... keep your head on straight and move forward.... I did it two years ago and have few regrets . I'm 42 , have a wonderful GF and three kids that i have more than my ex ( but I still pay support???) I plan to never marry again ... Its a contract to give someone half your sh*t

I hope you get all your gear back . I assume she broke a law or two?
I really hope you get it back in the same condition.

Tell me she knows you busted her? She must feel like a dum*ss about now.

Yes, I made a CD and a DVD of it and gave copies to my lawyer. We have a copy ready for the judge.

Want... so... bad.... to press charges, but it may not be necessary.

And yes, I know what you mean, whatever support I have to pay, but eventually it was better for everyone.

I take it lightly, overall. Which is why I wanted to put this in humor. The more humorous about it, the better I take it.

M0ses · #8 12-07-2010, 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NickInMesa

So, yes, what was done was in violation with a court order. I could include some details that would bother you even more, but seriously, as long as I get the basses back eventually, and reach the goals I want to reach in the divorce, I'll be fine.

"Eventually" would not be acceptable to me. I'd get a lawyer on her ass, and if that didn't work I'd have police knocking on her door. If you let someone **** you over once, you let them do it forever.

Joe_K · #9 12-07-2010, 10:07 PM

Sorry to hear that. I hope you are watching eBay for your equipment to make sure that it isn't being converted into quick cash to help fund legal costs.

**jmattbassplaya** · #10 12-07-2010, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe_K

Sorry to hear that. I hope you are watching eBay for your equipment to make sure that it isn't being converted into quick cash to help fund legal costs.

Didn't even think of this... and I doubt it would happen... but even so, I'd do everything to get your gear back ASAP.

NickInMesa · #11 12-07-2010, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe_K

Sorry to hear that. I hope you are watching eBay for your equipment to make sure that it isn't being converted into quick cash to help fund legal costs.

Yeah I have ebay and CL on watch. As for the pawn shops, stuff takes 2 months to clear here.

Hey, it's ok, guys, my kids are my #1 priority, the basses have a higher number.

Joe.shaffer · #12 12-07-2010, 10:14 PM

No good man. Hope everything works out in your favor.

Starrchild · #13 12-07-2010, 10:18 PM

Go get what's yours.

plankspanker13 · #14 12-07-2010, 10:43 PM

Two words come to mind:
Leverage, and ultimatum.

kesslari · #15 12-07-2010, 11:22 PM

If you're working with a lawyer, presumably you're getting better advice than I could give, so I'll just wish you good luck with the whole thing.

Jonny B · #16 12-07-2010, 11:30 PM

Good luck Nick, I hope it all works out for you. Divorce can be a good thing, it's just the going through it part that sucks.

agreatheight · #17 12-07-2010, 11:37 PM

High road! Kudos to you.

spaz21387 · #18 12-07-2010, 11:55 PM

So if it was me Id be kicking in that sister in laws door and getting my basses back. She had no right to go into your practice space and steal your basses.

behndy · #19 12-07-2010, 11:56 PM

you're a more calm man than me.

good luck and i hope it all turns out okay. sounds like you're handling it the right way.

best wishes man.

Chris K · #20 12-07-2010, 11:57 PM

1. Phone your SIL
2. Tell her to return the stuff today
3. ... or else the video will be on YT overnight.

3. is my personal favorite.

Welcome back!