Trials of a Mid-life Crisis Bass Player... - Page 7

jzangari · #**121** 02-05-2013, 05:00 PM

Great thread! I'm 46 and very lucky to be in a great band that plays really loud. I'm fortunate to have a wife that knows fashion and her best friend is in show business. This has put in the not too old not too young category pretty easily.

My problem is stage presence. I can't bop around like a jumping bean and I can't just stand there because the music is too lively for that. I don't even know how to stand now. When I was young and playing a lot I had the swagger. Now not so much. Anyone else?

boristhespider9 · #**122** 02-05-2013, 05:21 PM

Once you get that hip or knee replacement, your swagger will return.

qervo · #**123** 02-05-2013, 05:25 PM

You don't have to jump around to rock. Look at Black Sabbath. Just do what you feel.

Johnny StingRay · #**124** 02-05-2013, 05:46 PM

My midlife crisis was taking a teaching position as a teacher of the emotionally impaired in Traverse City, Michigan. I left Detroit Public Schools, hauled my family and our mobile home up to Interlochen, Michigan. We lived in the middle of nowhere. My sons had no friends to hang out with. My wife was away from her family in Detroit. It was miserable.......even though I had dreamed of living in northwest Michigan my entire life.....well, after one year I got back into Detroit Public Schools, sold the trailer, and moved back to Detroit.

My wife let me live my dream, but she knew I had to live it and find out that the grass ain't always greener in northern Michigan.......once I figured that out and we came back home to Detroit............all was good........she knew I had to figure it out for myself.....how great a wife is that!!!???

Oh, I just retired last Thursday as a teacher..........2 years in Los Angeles, 1 year in Traverse City, Michigan, and 30 years in Detroit.......

Flyingfrets · #**125** 02-05-2013, 06:18 PM

52 here. Had spinal neurosurgery September 2011 and just had a radical prostatectomy (including the lymph nodes due to prostate cancer) last Wednesday.

Mid-life crises lately seem to involve health issues, but otherwise it's all good. Great band I enjoy playing with, own pretty much most of the gear I've ever dreamed of owning. I'll be back playing as soon as the drains come out & I can hold a bass again.

The health worries probably aren't going away soon, but thankfully I have decent insurance & the music keeps me from dwelling on it.

I just try to do what I can, when I can and things seem to work out. Yes, the issues interfere with the band to a degree, but we've waited out several members' surgeries already and we've stuck together this far so not sweating being replaced on top of the medical problems.

Bassmanbob · #**126** 02-05-2013, 07:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jzangari

My problem is stage presence. I can't bop around like a jumping bean and I can't just stand there because the music is too lively for that. I don't even know how to stand now. When I was young and playing a lot I had the swagger. Now not so much. Anyone else?

You are over thinking this. If you feel like moving, move. If you feel like standing stil, stand still.

I'm almost 48. One of my band members calls me the dancing bear. I'm short, hairy and overweight, but I just do it. I get comments all the time how people like how I move around. Just make sure what you are doing is genuine and not interfering with how well you play.

brotherbassj · #**127** 02-05-2013, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Count Bassie

Family involvement- great advice. Don't let music make you a stranger to those you love/who love you... it's good to share your happy place once in a while.

This is critical.........i missed alot of time with my youngest before i wised up!

Quote:

Originally Posted by boristhespider9

Once you get that hip or knee replacement, your swagger will return.

Too funny.......

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bassmanbob

You are over thinking this. If you feel like moving, move. If you feel like standing stil, stand still.

I'm almost 48. One of my band members calls me the dancing bear. I'm short, hairy and overweight, but I just do it. I get comments all the time how people like how I move around. Just make sure what you are doing is genuine and not interfering with how well you play.

Yeah...I have an alter ego on Stage.....Jaboo.......kind like a stupid caveman at times.......lol

Count Bassie · #**128** 02-05-2013, 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qervo

But nothing beats the time I got into a head on collision on the way to play for a wedding...

...I sat half cocked on a bar stool and was still bleeding through the bandages when the first song kicked off...

THAT is some funny stuff right there man!! Not to mention commitment...

boristhespider9 · #**129** 02-05-2013, 09:18 PM

Photos?

qervo · #**130** 02-05-2013, 09:24 PM

Sorry I don't have photos of that gig. I know how TBers love photos but I wasn't thinking photos at the time . It happened when I was about 19 . I guess the only proof I had was the tiny specks of glass that stayed in my forehead for years afterwards . Besides I have no reason to make this stuff up.

Count Bassie · #**131** 02-05-2013, 09:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qervo

Sorry I don't have photos of that gig. ...I have no reason to make this stuff up.

Lousy you had the accident- indeed sorry about it! That isn't what was funny of course... just the story, you know; bleeding through your bandages while playing a wedding. No, you don't make that stuff up- unless you happen to be writing for television!

Ah, youth.

two fingers · #**132** 02-05-2013, 10:06 PM

(Sigh) Just finished my homework. Got an email from a friend. He was wanting to know if I could do a fill-in gig with a band he knows next weekend. Included in the email was a set list. I recognized about 5 songs. And I don't think the stuff they play is all that heavy, In fact my friend said it's pretty much "main-stream radio rock". What does THAT say about my age? Oh, I'm playing the stinking show. And when I get there, I'm going to act as though THEY don't know what's hip..... or cool........ or fly........ or the bomb.......or whatever. Shut up.

Maybe I'll check with my nephew. I DROVE to the hospital the day he was born, and now he plays drums in clubs. Oy. Maybe he'll know some of this stuff.

Holdsg · #**133** 02-05-2013, 10:19 PM

Good skills, fingers, you sound like you're gonna need it!

Count Bassie · #**134** 02-05-2013, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by two fingers

(Sigh) Just finished my homework. Got an email from a friend. He was wanting to know if I could do a fill-in gig with a band he knows next weekend. Included in the email was a set list. I recognized about 5 songs. And I don't think the stuff they play is all that heavy, In fact my friend said it's pretty much "main-stream radio rock". What does THAT say about my age? Oh, I'm playing the stinking show. And when I get there, I'm going to act as though THEY don't know what's hip..... or cool........ or fly........ or the bomb.......or whatever. Shut up.

Maybe I'll check with my nephew. I DROVE to the hospital the day he was born, and now he plays drums in clubs. Oy. Maybe he'll know some of this stuff.

I'm educating kids about Led Zeppelin. Curiously they already know how to tie their shoes...

two fingers · #**135** 02-05-2013, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Holdsg

Good skills, fingers, you sound like you're gonna need it!

Thanks. I'm not too worried about it. I do fill-in stuff all the time. Don't tell the kids, but just about everything new on bass was copped form the guys we grew up playing anyway. So it shouldn't be a stretch.

It just shook me a little bit that I didn't even recognize the names of bands that are supposed to be "main-stream radio rock". THAT made me fell a bit....... um........ "mature".

qervo · #**136** 02-05-2013, 10:54 PM

That's sort of how I feel when I watch the Grammys or , Video Award Shows. Who the heck are these people ??

Russell L · #**137** 02-05-2013, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qervo

That's sort of how I feel when I watch the Grammys or , Video Award Shows. Who the heck are these people ??

Mercy me, I've been like that for a long time.

agent77 · #**138** 02-05-2013, 11:19 PM

OK guys, 40 years old, never been married, no kids, friends are too busy for me, no car, one bedroom apartment, and the company I work for is broke.

But......I have two nephews, ages 4 and 6. Last week they spent the night at their aunt's house where they could play with their cousin. Before they left I heard them both say, "I wanna sleep over at Uncle Kenny's house instead."

And.....I play in a crappy band with 2 twentysomethings. Guitarist thinks my lyrics are genius, and the drummer thinks I'm some kind of bassist god because I can play arpeggios.

**RaginRog** · #**139** 02-06-2013, 03:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brotherbassj

This is critical.........i missed alot of time with my youngest before i wised up!

Too funny.......

Yeah...I have an alter ego on Stage.....Jaboo.......kind like a stupid caveman at times.......lol

Jaboo likes hats with bats...

**RaginRog** · #**140** 02-06-2013, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Johnny StingRay

My midlife crisis was taking a teaching position as a teacher of the emotionally impaired in Traverse City, Michigan. I left Detroit Public Schools, hauled my family and our mobile home up to Interlochen, Michigan. We lived in the middle of nowhere. My sons had no friends to hang out with. My wife was away from her family in Detroit. It was miserable.......even though I had dreamed of living in northwest Michigan my entire life.....well, after one year I got back into Detroit Public Schools, sold the trailer, and moved back to Detroit.

My wife let me live my dream, but she knew I had to live it and find out that the grass ain't always greener in northern Michigan.......once I figured that out and we came back home to Detroit............all was good........she knew I had to figure it out for myself.....how great a wife is that!!!???

Oh, I just retired last Thursday as a teacher..........2 years in Los Angeles, 1 year in Traverse City, Michigan, and 30 years in Detroit.......

Congrats on Retirement...I will likely have to work until I'm 70....what's another 29 years anyway?