What's the dumbest thing a non-musician has ever said to you?

NickInMesa · #1 05-21-2009, 11:19 PM

This is a little bit like this other thread:

whats the dummest thing a guitarist has ever said to you?

But this time what is the dumbest thing a non-musician has ever said to you about your instrument or your playing?

My mom had that annoying boyfriend who would often crash at my home. After listening to me practice scales: "What you play is boring! You call yourself a musician?"

That retarded kid at school kept yelling at me each time he saw me with my gig bag: "basses are retarded! play guitar instead! nobody needs basses!" And then would proceed to listen to metal on his Walkman, mainly Maiden (of all bands).

And of course thousands of "why does it have 4 strings only?", "why is the neck longer?"

My dad (my parents were divorced) thought I was making it up and that such an instrument did not exist. One of my weekends at his place I brought the instrument to prove I did not make it up, that there was such an instrument. No kidding. Yes, he is very educated, not musically (it shows).

And repeated 1000 times: "why didn't pick guitar? too complicaaaaated?" (snirfl!)

rhythmsection · #2 05-21-2009, 11:25 PM

In a perfect world, people would gawk at the over-wanking guitarist and say, "Why didn't you play Bass?"

southernrocker · #3 05-21-2009, 11:34 PM

I get a "Nice guitar" all the time. IT IS A BASS, A FRIGGEN ELECTRIC BASS!

Sartori · #4 05-22-2009, 12:13 AM

I've gotten the "You play guitar?" a lot. It's annoying, but it's not that remarkably dumb. I don't expect everyone to be an expert about music.

WalterBush · #5 05-22-2009, 12:18 AM

I think the single dumbest thing I've ever heard is, "Can you play song x? No? What kind of band doesn't know song x? You're not a real band if you can't play song x, it's like the best song ever. It's easy, can't you just play it once?"

I can't replicate the drunken slur this type of question usually gets asked in, and the song is always different, but I always thought a drunk non-musician telling me what makes a band or which songs were easy was absurd.

**jmattbassplaya** · #6 05-22-2009, 03:02 AM

This comment wasn`t dumb, but it was... interesting... for lack of a better word.

I had just finished jamming with my two friends(one a guitarist, the other a guitard) and a drummer who was a new kid at school. After the jam I took my stuff downstairs and he proceeded to tell the guitarists, "Hey, great bassist. He isn`t loud at all!" When the guys told me this I just looked at them and was like, "....okay.... that`s nice to know...". Weird, huh?

I have gotten a lot of people who`ve seen me on upright say, "Hey, you play cello?" That one does bother me.

PBass101 · #7 05-22-2009, 03:18 AM

"He doesn't have any melody or rhythm at all" - former roommate I overheard discussing my having spent ten minutes before a class messing around on a few scales. Gee, thanks pal...

Shawman · #8 05-22-2009, 03:44 AM

this guitarist i was in a band with was a bit retarded (shocker!)

"yeah, i liked it in that tuning but i dropped it a little bit so if you come to next practice tuned to C flat it will sound awesome"

best thing is, i didn't bother correcting him, he probably still wonders why i laughed so much whenever he said it

drteeth · #9 05-22-2009, 03:48 AM

"..but you can't hear the bass in music, right?" Right after that, he went on about how much he likes 'another one bites the dust' -.-

Shaun_Bass0 · #10 05-22-2009, 04:04 AM

Random girl in pub:-

"Why would you need to practise? You're in a band, playing gigs, that must mean your good enough"!!!

Cuz I would never want to do something stupid like improving

...that one really got to me!

woffle · #11 05-22-2009, 04:15 AM

Played an open air last weekend in Berlin,
turned up with a Preci & a Jazz.
Went to the dude at mixer and asked what he preferred(from his exp).
Turns out dos'nt know the difference so I try to explain,looks at me kinda strange
and then says your the bass man you choose and I'll mix.
when I mentioned DI box saw strait up dude was running on overload.
And so was the sound for all 3 bands.
Woffle
Bass player for circle-of-hands

Stealth · #12 05-22-2009, 05:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NickInMesa

That retarded kid at school kept yelling at me each time he saw me with my gig bag: "basses are retarded! play guitar instead! nobody needs basses!" And then would proceed to listen to metal on his Walkman, mainly Maiden (of all bands).

Steve Harris disapproves of your sentence.

Granted, the guy you mentioned seems like a total idiot, but on a more global scale than just music.

NickInMesa · #13 05-22-2009, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stealth

Steve Harris disapproves of your sentence.

Granted, the guy you mentioned seems like a total idiot, but on a more global scale than just music.

Because Maiden's bassist is the founding member, on top of being a leader and being a great contributor of their sound, I found it stupid, that's all.

NickInMesa · #14 05-22-2009, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawman

this guitarist i was in a band with was a bit retarded (shocker!)

"yeah, i liked it in that tuning but i dropped it a little bit so if you come to next practice tuned to C flat it will sound awesome"

best thing is, i didn't bother correcting him, he probably still wonders why i laughed so much whenever he said it

For the guitard-related thread follow the link in my OP

Sartori · #15 05-22-2009, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NickInMesa

Because Maiden's bassist is the founding member, on top of being a leader and being a great contributor of their sound, I found it stupid, that's all.

I like Steve Harris. He's in a metal band, with three guitarists, but always makes sure he can be heard.

pasta4lnch · #16 05-22-2009, 12:27 PM

"wow! your really good at that, you should be a magician!"

FunkMetalBass · #17 05-22-2009, 12:41 PM

I actually thrive off of the weird comments that I get. I like to play them off too with strange remarks.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Question

"Why do you play bass? Guitar is much cooler."

"I'm actually a guitarist, and I'm much better than the guitarist in the band, but he went on an ego trip so I agreed to play bass to try to make him look better."
or
"Why do you wear shoes? Sandals are much cooler." **walks away**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Question

"Why does it only have 4 strings?"

"There was a defect in the factory and they accidentally produced 5 of these things. They are very rare and worth a lot of money."
or
"I couldn't afford the other two. By the way, here's our tip jar."

Quote:

Originally Posted by Question

"Can you play **insert song title here**"

"No, but can you teach me?" **hands bass over**

I figure that the people asking these questions don't know the answer and probably don't honestly care about the answer - no need for me to get frustrated by it. I'd rather just have fun thinking about a conversation that person will have later on when he makes a fool of himself talking about the "super rare 4-string guitar" that I play. Lol.

ErebusBass · #18 05-22-2009, 12:54 PM

I play five strings, so the two I'm used to are:

That can't be a bass! Basses have four strings!

and

Why is your guitar so much bigger than the other ones?

El Beardo · #19 05-22-2009, 12:59 PM

"Bass??....Why didn't you get a guitar? They got all the solos."

This question came from my own father......

FunkMetalBass · #20 05-22-2009, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ErebusBass

I play five strings, so the two I'm used to are:

That can't be a bass! Basses have four strings!

and

Why is your guitar so much bigger than the other ones?

"Are you sure? A guitar has 6 strings and a kazoo has none, so I'd be willing to bet it's a bass because it falls somewhere in the middle. Otherwise I got ripped off by that salesman."