Go Back   TalkBass Forums > Bass Guitar Forums > Bass Guitar Forums > Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]
Register Rules/FAQ/CUP Members List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG] Bass jokes, musician jokes, gigs gone wrong...


Supporting Membership
Thank You

Latest Supporting Member
Donate to Upgrade Today

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #1  
Old 07-08-2002, 12:48 PM
Registered User

Wouldn't you like to know?!
 
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Atlanta
Send a message via Yahoo to Woodchuck
What's the worst wedding gig you've ever played?

Sign in to disble this ad
I have two. At the first one, the bride had an uncle who never quite made it as a singer, so he figured this was his chance. He hijacked the mic during "Ain't No Stopping Us Now", and decided that the crowd wanted to hear his 1 hour version, and apparently the vodka he was loaded on agreed. After about 30 minutes or so, I stopped playing. If you've ever played that song before, you'd know why. It's a VERY busy bassline. When I stopped, he turned to the crowd (his family) and said, "Boo the bassplayer!", and his family was like, "No! YOU sit down and shut up!" He spent the rest of the night trying to get his "revenge", whatever that would've entailed. He did mention something to the effect of "You're lucky that I'm not a physical man."

At the second one, EVERYONE at the reception wanted to do a verse of "Sweet Home Alabama"!The same verse! The second one that mentions Watergate. The bandleader apologized for hours after that one.
__________________
There's a reason why women love us bass players.The tone is like Barry White's voice, and the strings are thick like Ron Jeremy's...well, you get the point.
  #2  
Old 07-09-2002, 03:11 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Ireland
Oh God! I have thousands of these

The standard father of the bride who gets up to do "a few bars" of invariably Delilah, 'sweet caroline' or 'the candy store on the corner' in his own unique rhythm and pitch (I swear to god one guy went from 5/4 to 3/4 up to 7/4 one night and the song changed key about 20 times in the first verse alone).

The guy who asks to get up to sing 'Elvis' who disappears for a few minutes only to re-appear in full 'Fat Elvis the vegas years' regalia..wig, sideburns, shiny belt and all...I swear I nearly puked I was laughing so much.

Riot between the two families In THE MIDDLE OF THE FIRST SONG .

The electricity grid going down in the area just as we were about to start....by the time it came back on (3 hours later) we could only play one song before the premises were shut (in fairness they still paid us though...easiest money I ever made)

Drunken singer who in fairness hid it brilliantly...never missed a cue or a line and sang in pitch all night UNTIL he announced the next song was by 'Simon and Carabunkle', sang 'Teddy bear' as 'Pubic hair' and started Chris De Burghs lonely skies as 'My underpants they call Labeeze are swirling down around my knees......'.

And the best.....The gang of 'hard cases' who decided to gatecrash a wedding not realising it was a 'special forces' bash....needless to say they got a good lesson in manners....most entertaining wedding I was ever at.
__________________
"A great bass player MAKES a great vocal happen while a mediocre one limits the singer. The bass player is like a pilot keeping the ship away from the rocks. It doesn't draw attention to its self but it's a great big pain when there's nothing wrong with a bass but nothing right about it either".

Bob Ohlsson, former Motown 'super' engineer.....the man responsible for THAT sound.
  #3  
Old 07-09-2002, 04:29 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: South East Cans Ass
Wedding Gigs

Crap We've got a wedding to do in Nevada Missouri on the 27th LOL

weddings are just like biker gigs theres always somebody who wants to take over the mic, and theve had way too much to drink. Or DUDE I can play guitar I promise!!!
__________________
Rickenmodder Club #3
I just want to drink till Im not thirsty and I just want to sleep till Im not tired.
  #4  
Old 07-09-2002, 06:27 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2000
Sadly, I've never played a wedding gig, and don't really expect to, since everybody wants to throw their money away on a DJ for weddings/parties.

Hey Woodchuck, if that dude decided to get "physical" you could have hit him with your bass, then threw your cab at him.
__________________
"One man's 'pig thief' is another man's 'swine liberator.' It's all in the marketing." - Unrepresented.
  #5  
Old 07-19-2002, 12:10 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Send a message via AIM to hyperlitem
im envious, i bet if i played in a wedding band id have better stories. As it stands not alot of people want to hire indie bands to play weddings, but theres alot of hot punk girls to be had usually. I bet all the single girls seeing their friends get married makes them depressed and want the band guys, so mabye you guys do have me beat in that catagory.
  #6  
Old 07-21-2002, 10:48 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Cottage Grove, MN
Talking

I think it is a tie score. Every wedding gig is tied with all the others for worst wedding gig ever. Each one has the drunken uncle, aunt, father of the bride, etc., etc. who is a wannabe musician and they always make their presence known. I always get a special laugh when (this always happens) a woman comes up during a break and asks if her husband/boyfriend can play a song because he used to play in a band. Evidently there is a massive collection of horrible ex-musicians who frequent weddings because that's the only place where they have even half a chance of getting up on stage. We always charge boucoup money to play weddings because of the high coefficient of foolishness that always seems to be present!
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Follow TalkBass on Twitter   Visit TalkBass on Facebook  

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:55 AM.




Copyright 2011 Talk Music Group Inc. All rights reserved.
Play guitar? Visit our new sister site TalkGuitar.com [beta]
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.12
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.