So, a couple of weeks back I did a thread about how to let go and not get caught up in thoughts so much, since my drummer is a bit shaky on his timing still, and that used to get me worried so much it would throw my own playing off.
We had this concert coming up, and I practiced my lines extensively, so I'd be able to be confident and relax.
At this point, I would like to give a general thank you to all who gave me tips and to everyone on this forum generally for sharing all their wisdom.
The concert worked really well

I got to a point where I could just be cool and enjoy the music, I was dancing and having a good time, smiling at the audience, felt really good, I was able to put the emotion into the songs that I felt strong about.
One or two small glitches, but they didn't throw me (or anyone else) off. The drummer rushed a little sometimes, but instead of worrying, I just adapted and kept cool.
The best thing that happened was after our 2 sets, when we started jamming - it was a rather casual bbq/garden party.
I started jamming with my drummer, and I got into an incedible state - my playing just magically happened - I was so much into it, nothing went wrong - I just enjoyed the music. I made up cool grooves and lines on the spot, watching myself do them, without any nervousness or fear - and it worked out great.
People started dancing to just my basslines.

One guy started dancing like mad, and I felt as if I could control his dance with changing the groove - it was awesome - my drummer felt like that too, and we tried to whip the guy into a frenzy as much as we could.
Wow, that was a great feeling. I wasn't bothered with the audience at all. The music just dripped from my fingers, and I was not really struggling to play at all - I just listened to the music as it happened, surprised of what came out of me.
It was a rather casual settings, so people walked around on stage, and sometimes I would look at them and talk to them - with my bass
Uhm yep - so a long rant short - I had a great time, and I felt like I was really making some music for the first time. I think I understand a little better now.