As a redneck who lives in the deep south, I'm fixin' to learn ya with some of the more common musical terms we use down here.
A440 - The Highway that runs around Nashville
Arpeggio - That storybook kid who's nose grew every time he told a lie.
Bassoon - Typical response when asked what you hope to catch and when.
Big Band - When the bar pays enough to bring two banjo players.
Bossa Nova - The car your foreman drives.
Cadenza - That ugly thing that your wife vacuums dog hair off of before company arrives.
Cello - The proper way to answer the phone.
Clarinet - The name used for your second daughter if you've already used Betty Jo.
Conductor - The man who punches your ticket on the train to Birmingham.
Cut time - Parole
Cymbal - What they use on Deer Crossing signs so you know when to get out your rifle.
Diminished 5th - An empty bottle of Jack Daniels
Perfect 5th - A full bottle of Jack Daniels
Melodic Minor - Loretta Lynns' singing father
Minor 3rd - Your age and grade when you've finished school.
Order of Sharps - What a metrosexual asks for at a bar.
Passing Tone - The sound heard near the baked beans at a family reunion.
Relative Major - Your uncle in the Marine Corps
Relative Minor - Your fiancee
Tempo - Type of car found rusting in your backyard
Time Signature - What you need from your boss if you forget to clock in
Transpositions - Men who wear dresses.
Treble - Women taint nothin' but
