*Le Sigh*

GeneralElectric · #1 12-22-2008, 12:20 AM

So its 2am EST and my mother is on PST. She's calling me screaming about my school work (even though she doesn't pay any of it)

Now me and my mother have never gotten along well, and things right now are at an all time low.

When I lived under their roof I was given a credit card under her name. When I found out I could not build credit under my own name because of it (not to mention scrutiny on my purchases) I got my own accounts and a card.

My parents set up a college fund for me as well, which I have never seen. It was locked up as a minor account (meaning that the account is in my name and should've been mine when I turned 18) and she refused to relinquish it.

Now my father died recently and he had a video will. Which was never shown to anyone as my mother is the only one in contact with the attorney. She also never scheduled anything
Though he made it known on several occasions that all his musical equipment would be mine as I'm the only child to play music. My mother got the house, etc.

Now I'm the youngest of three, and my dad was survived by me and my siblings as well as my mother. I had figured that his money would be split three ways, however much it is. I wasn't too concerned, but it would help me pay off my bills. I'm not in any rush to get his money as while I could really use it, I'm not dire need of it. His money was split, how I understand it, three ways, with most of his material assets going to my mother. My half brother isn't getting anything, but thats another story.

Part of this phone conversation, aside from telling me how worthless I am, was saying that she was going to spend my inheritance because I'm "not worth it."

What I'm trying to see is there anything legal I can do, with my very limited finances, to turn this around and get my inheritance. Getting the accounts in my name relinquished to me would be nice too as there is a few thousand dollars in there I could use for rent, school books, and to fix up my truck. However those accounts aren't my main concern.

Is there a deadline as to when she has to show the will as she has power of attorney over the estate?

Araillac · #2 12-22-2008, 12:29 AM

Do you need a decent answer now or can you wait till Dec. 26 - 31 when I'll have a real keyboard?

GeneralElectric · #3 12-22-2008, 12:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Araillac

Do you need a decent answer now or can you wait till Dec. 26 - 31 when I'll have a real keyboard?

I could wait though the sooner the better.

I've had to use the windows onscreen keyboard before when I smashed my keyboard. Nowadays I use an old IBM mechanical keyboard which can sure take a beating.

hbarcat · #4 12-22-2008, 12:36 AM

Talk to an attorney. This is NOT the kind of subject where you can get good, reliable advice from a bunch of bass players on the internet.

TBird1958 · #5 12-22-2008, 12:40 AM

Most lawyers will discuss your case for 1/2 hour for free, before you do that you might ask what their retainer fee for an inheritance case would be. Not easy to do because you're on the opposite coast, but at least you'll have some control over what goes on, hopefully just mentioning this will slow down her plans for your money.

GeneralElectric · #6 12-22-2008, 12:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hbarcat

Talk to an attorney. This is NOT the kind of subject where you can get good, reliable advice from a bunch of bass players on the internet.

From what I've been hearing lawyers cost about $400 an hour (or so I've been hearing over and over again in the wake of my dad's death. Thats how much his attorney cost.) I was hoping maybe someone on TB has maybe a little legal experience or maybe was in a situation.

If my current bank statement says anything, I could see a lawyer for about 45 seconds.

GeneralElectric · #7 12-22-2008, 12:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TBird1958

Most lawyers will discuss your case for 1/2 hour for free, before you do that you might ask what their retainer fee for an inheritance case would be. Not easy to do because you're on the opposite coast, but at least you'll have some control over what goes on, hopefully just mentioning this will slow down her plans for your money.

That half hour bit is good to know. I guess I should start flipping through the Yellow Pages.

I'm not so much concerned about the fact that its money, but the fact that its something legally mine, and she's trying to use it as leverage and when it doesn't work, she's going to keep it.

EDIT: I don't even know how much my inheritance is unfortunately. I don't come from a particularly rich family, just a slightly upper middle class family that wasn't so good with money. For all I know it could be $500, or it could be $5,000, or more.

selfblessed · #8 12-22-2008, 12:57 AM

Whatever you do keep it classy.

Hollow Man · #9 12-22-2008, 10:22 AM

I think there are attorneys who offer free or relatively inexpensive consultation. I wouldn't give up on that angle just yet.

Either way, short of changing your mother's mind, you're going to have to go the legal route, which means attorney's, which means money. It's worth a small investment on your part to know what your options are. Don't be afraid to call legal offices, give them the 30-second synopsis, and ask what options they offer as far as consultations.

L-A · #10 12-22-2008, 10:29 AM

Can you call HER attorney? If you're mentioned in your father's will, "He's not worth it" is no reason for her to have your inheritance. She has to have made a falsified authorisation from you, or something of the like.

Maybe I'm wrong, too.

Mark Latimour · #11 12-22-2008, 10:36 AM

IIRC, and I am not an expert in this, the executor of the estate acts on behalf of all the beneficiaries of the estate and not in any particualr party. The costs of adminsitering the estate come out of the estate. What does this mean? It means that the solicitor / attorney who is doign the will acts for YOU are well if you are a beneficiary. You can call them up and instruct them with what to do with your share of the estate. My first port of call would be to make a call to them and let them know what your wishes are with your share and that it is not to be paid via your mother under any circumstances etc.

sarcastro83 · #12 12-22-2008, 11:21 AM

Jesus, dude... I've got no advice, but I hope things work out for you. This sounds awful...

Alcyon · #13 12-22-2008, 12:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sarcastro83

Jesus, dude... I've got no advice, but I hope things work out for you. This sounds awful...

Mhm... Best of luck, my friend.

Georynn · #14 12-22-2008, 12:21 PM

I hate to say this, but for some reason death seems to bring out the worst in people when money is concerned... I am deeply saddened by this fact.

I wish you much luck GE, I'd hate to be going through what you are experiencing... best of luck

EricF · #15 12-22-2008, 12:29 PM

This is a bummer, man. I hope things work out easily and quickly.

**Eric Perry** · #16 12-22-2008, 12:31 PM

Good luck dude. Your mom sounds.... Not real nice!

It is 12/22 though. Why don't you chill out and enjoy the holiday? This mess will still be here on 12/26, or even better.. 1/02/09!

In any event, good luck!

Ericman197 · #17 12-22-2008, 12:57 PM

There isn't much we/I can say without seeing the will.

Most of the time, a husband wills everything to his wife, and vice versa. You only come in if both parents die. It is possible that he wanted to will a small amount of money/possessions to you and your siblings, but unless this is explicitly stated in the will, you will receive nothing.

And in my experience with wills, no matter how black and white things may seem, it can be tricky. A judge can still rule against what the will states, based on testimony, previous wills, etc. For example, my grandmother (who is a bit senile) promised me everything (in contradiction to previous wills). But this would never hold up in court - my mom could easily sue me for it, and win.

It sounds like your mom has a lot more leverage on this matter than you do. Unless there is something in the will that states you are to receive $X and X number of guitars and basses, you will almost certainly get nothing. And you still might lose. Talk to a lawyer, for sure, but it will be an uphill battle.

WickedPissah · #18 12-22-2008, 01:17 PM

Hope it all works out for ya.

spade2you · #19 12-22-2008, 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hbarcat

Talk to an attorney. This is NOT the kind of subject where you can get good, reliable advice from a bunch of bass players on the internet.

Especially since most of us are at least half sauced on Christmas brews.

Although....aren't there a few lawyers on TB?

Ericman197 · #20 12-22-2008, 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spade2you

Especially since most of us are at least half sauced on Christmas brews.

Although....aren't there a few lawyers on TB?

A real lawyer would be ill advised to give internet advice. I have a friend who absolutely refuses to. Not only does would he put himself at risk, but there's no lawyer/client relationship, and no support structure. An 'internet lawyer' cannot go to trial for you, or really do anything particularly helpful. It's not unlike medical advice on the internet: it can be helpful, but it is very difficult to make a 100% confident diagnosis.