|  | 
01-24-2011, 07:57 AM
| | | | 8 Years Ago Today...
Sign in to disble this ad
8 years ago today, I married my daughter's mother.
5 years and some months ago, we separated.
A little less than 5 years ago, the divorce was finalized.
About 9 months ago, my ex-wife, my daughter's mother, made the unfortunate choice to take her own life.
So far, today has been a day filled with uneasy recollection of a great many searing regrets. I hope your collective day is better than mine, TB.
I'm not sure why I felt the need to post this here, but there it is.
__________________
Fretless.
|
01-24-2011, 08:00 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Western Massachusetts, USA | | | im sorry to hear that. i dont really know what to say but i hope things start picking up for you
__________________
The official overdriven, fuzzed out and distorted club #6
Mediocre Bass Player Club- #525
|
01-24-2011, 08:31 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Elk Neck,Maryland | | | It WILL improve and I know first hand with suicide situations. Love that girl to pieces, she has a lot of loss. -Luke
__________________
U.S. Peavey Cirrus Six String Club #1 Join us Here!
U.S. Peavey Cirrus Club #82
U.S. Peavey Club #44
Team Trace Elliot #172
Official Off-Road Club #1 Join us Here! "Catharses" |
01-24-2011, 08:32 AM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Eh? | | | You have all the rights to be sad about it. Stay strong, man.
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by tom once dead  Also to prove my Australianism, I've been stung by an irukandji jellyfish before, while snorkelling at an island looking at stingrays. | |
01-24-2011, 08:49 AM
|  | Registered User | | | | | I'm sorry to hear that. Some aspects of life are out of our hands, each has their own perspective in what they see in the world, as much as anyone may try, sometimes it's not possible to bring clarity to that.
Take your time, take it easy. Grieving is a natural thing, it has to come out.
Last edited by Skitch it! : 01-24-2011 at 10:04 AM.
|
01-24-2011, 09:14 AM
|  | that video LIES | | Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Northern California | | | That's hard to fathom- keep talking, that can't hurt in the long run.
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Fat Albert He who throws mud only loses ground. | |
01-24-2011, 09:30 AM
| | | | Thanks folks.
She had custody of our daughter when she died, but she was at my house for that weekend. I got the call at about 1am and went to the ER. She was basically alive on life support, but her brain had been deprived of oxygen for about 25 minutes, and her heart would not keep beating without assistance.
They ran something they described as a "deep scan" MRI, and there was only about 5% stem activity, and 0% cortex activity. We talked briefly, signed the order to discontinue life support, and had the funeral 2 days later. The funeral home was packed beyond capacity, and people were standing in the aisles and in the waiting room.
Perhaps the most awful conversation I've ever had in my life was telling my 6 year old daughter that her mother would never be coming home again. I had harbored a lot of resentment of my ex-wife, regarding the particularly underhanded way in which she essentially stole custody of the child from me. But I never wanted to regain custody under such circumstances.
__________________
Fretless.
|
01-24-2011, 09:37 AM
|  | That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it.. | | Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Robbinsville, NJ | | | That's a very very hard thing to deal with as a dad.
My ex was suicidal at one point, and made at least two attempts. Though she was not successful and eventually got help, it still left me in a horrible position to having to explain to our kids what she had done. I was left questioning over and over again.."is this my fault.." even though I knew better. It just sucked.
I can't even imagine what I would have done if she was successful... just hang in there and be strong, man.
You're a dad - you're a little girl's hero for life. Be strong for her!
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by 6jase5 Cleavage heals. | Quote:
Originally Posted by machine gewehr I happened to have a better experience, a peegasm. | |
01-24-2011, 01:48 PM
|  | Holy Ghost filled Bass Player Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2000 Location: Heber Springs, Arkansas | | Quote:
Originally Posted by VS It WILL improve and I know first hand with suicide situations. Love that girl to pieces, she has a lot of loss. -Luke | +1
The pain will ease with time, for you. For your daughter, this will leave a deep scar. Be there for her. Show her how much you love her and care about her.
__________________
Experience is what you get, when you don't get what you want.
45 year old freshman
|
01-24-2011, 03:48 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Istanbul | | | Sorry to hear that man,I can't even imagina how you must be feeling.
but as Relic said,be strong as you are the hero for life for your daughter.
Hope it'll be all better for you,best wishes from Istanbul...
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Relic Yes, you look like the pizza, dammit. Now get back to work!:D | Quote:
Originally Posted by macaroni tony You're a very handsome man :D | |
01-24-2011, 03:52 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Arkansas | | Ill be praying for you 
__________________
"O, Ye people of the land! Turn up the bass!"
- II Opinions 7:3
Christian Praise and Worship Bassist #884
Spector Club #204
|
01-24-2011, 06:13 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Sartell, MN | | | That is terrible man, I wish I could say more to help, but I have never been in a place like that. Hang in there, remember everyone here is thinking of you. I do know time makes things easier, but it will be hard to wait.
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by stepswork4me isspell is wut a volcano does with llama. | Find Chaostrophe on Reverbnation and Facebook!
|
01-24-2011, 06:22 PM
| | Registered User
Beta Tester: Source Audio. Hacker: Heavy Drone FX | | Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Spokane, WA. | | | Man,...post like these always bring a lot of perspective into mind.
Good vibes headed your way man. Keep your stick on the ice. |
01-25-2011, 10:41 AM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Lake Charles, La. | | | I've been thriugh most of it but with no child involved. It gets easier with time. Sometimes it takes a lot of time, though. Focus on what is important and accept the moral support of all of us here.
__________________
Bacon gives me a lard on.
|
01-25-2011, 11:18 AM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Saint Clair, MI | | | I'll be praying for you and your daughter. You've been through a lot.
__________________
P-bass Club member #377 - Traben Club #57 - Ampeg Club #575 - Fretless #728
Worship Bassist Club member #201 - Michigan Bassists #16 - 50+ Club #36 - Old Basstards #156
|
01-25-2011, 11:18 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: May 2010 Location: Los Angeles, CA | | | Man, that gave me chills. I hope you have a better day. Make a conscious decision to do something good for yourself today.
(hug) |
01-25-2011, 02:09 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Carol Stream, IL | | | How is your daughter? |
01-25-2011, 03:41 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Virginia | | | I'm sorry to hear that man. I've been thru suicide situations before and it takes awhile to get over it. I will keep you in my prayers. | | Thread Tools | Search this Thread | | | | 
Posting Rules
| You may not post new threads You may not post replies You may not post attachments You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off | | | |
