Advice on how to "move out"

[Thunderscreech]

After a year of college, in which I discovered that dorm living and college life wasn't for me, I've come back home to discover that living with the Parental Units isn't very fun, either. My mom and I have an argument at least once a month, most always on the "you-need-to-get-a-job-or-do-meaning-ful(and less)-volunteer-work-or-else-I'll-make-your-life-unlivable-by-nagging-you-to death" subject. My dad and I get along fine, but my hours of wakefulness (between 10AM and 2AM) don't coincide with my parents'.

Plus, the fact that I'm taking classes at a community college approx. 50 miles away makes it even more inconvenient to live at home. In other words, it's in my best interest to move out. And how I'm going to do that, i'm not sure, so I figured i'd ask a bunch of complete strangers on the Internet for advice.

[bongomania]

Well, you need money. No way around that. No money = no move out. So that means get a job. Once you've got a job, you need to save every goddam penny -no gear buying, no movies, no soda pop with lunch, etc.- because many rentals require first and last months' rent plus a month's rent as a deposit, meaning three months of rent money up front before you get to walk in the front door.

Once you've got that money together, and a job (looks good credit-wise to potential landlords or roommates), you get all your crap packed into boxes aquired from the produce section of the grocery store. Apple, pear, and orange boxes are best.

[MJ5150]

Get a job, and move out. The fighting won't magically stop if you get a job.

-Mike

[Trevorus]

Originally Posted by MJ5150

Get a job, and move out. The fighting won't magically stop if you get a job.

-Mike

If he keeps himself busy enough, it might help reduce the hours of interaction.

[GeneralElectric]

The easier way to move our of your house is through the front door.

Having an argument once a month isn't bad. I fought with my sister and mother every day when I was living at home. I moved 2,000 miles away and I still fight with them. Sometimes family members are jerks.

Though I fail to see how a real job would be detrimental to your daily life. Get at least 5-6 thousand together, and a job, and start looking through CL to find a room mate, or get a bunch of your friends together.

[cheezewiz]

So get a job and start paying your own way instead of sponging off your parents then complaining about it.

[Tsal]

Dorm life and studying something meaningful does sound like it's the easiest option. Getting a degree in anything even remotely commercially usable expands your options - in fact, pretty much degree of any field does. What was the problem with the college/dorm living, originally?

[OtterOnBass]

Don't move out. Start volunteering somewhere. Problem solved, and people are helped. Like kids? How about homeless people? It seems like your mom wants you to take some initiative in forming who you are and what you are going to do. Moving out won't help that, it will just cost a ton of money.

[gtxtom]

Originally Posted by bongomania

Well, you need money. No way around that. No money = no move out. So that means get a job. Once you've got a job, you need to save every goddam penny -no gear buying, no movies, no soda pop with lunch, etc.- because many rentals require first and last months' rent plus a month's rent as a deposit, meaning three months of rent money up front before you get to walk in the front door.

Once you've got that money together, and a job (looks good credit-wise to potential landlords or roommates), you get all your crap packed into boxes aquired from the produce section of the grocery store. Apple, pear, and orange boxes are best.

Or you could do what I just did. Ask places if they have any current specials. I got January for free and move in on the 2nd! All I payed to move in was security deposit, application fee, and pet fee. If you don't have pets, even better

[Thunderscreech]

Originally Posted by Tsal

Dorm life and studying something meaningful does sound like it's the easiest option. Getting a degree in anything even remotely commercially usable expands your options - in fact, pretty much degree of any field does. What was the problem with the college/dorm living, originally?

It wasn't my thing. The roommate I liked failed out. The one I grew to hate with every fiber of my being moved in. I was already tired of the whole school buisness, and then I had the epitome of douchebaggery move in with me.

Plus, Liberal Arts has too many boring rules. At least with what I'm going into (Architectural Drafting & CAD Tech Certificate programs) I can make cool stuff and not have to know how to analyze some writing to draw out whatever kind of meaning I want.

I would have stayed if they'd had degrees in Arson, Pre-Dictator, Pre-Mad Scientist and World Takeover. Since they didn't, I had to settle for my secondary career choice...

Originally Posted by OtterOnBass

Don't move out. Start volunteering somewhere. Problem solved, and people are helped. Like kids? How about homeless people? It seems like your mom wants you to take some initiative in forming who you are and what you are going to do. Moving out won't help that, it will just cost a ton of money.

Not to sound cold-hearted, but I want to have some sort of Income. Warm fuzzy feelings make a damn poor substitute for food. If I had a job, I'd be more apt to volunteer my time to people who need help.

Originally Posted by cheezewiz

So get a job and start paying your own way instead of sponging off your parents then complaining about it.

I'm working on the job part. It'd be REALY ****ING NICE if someone would call me back after I drop off my applications.

Originally Posted by Trevorus

If he keeps himself busy enough, it might help reduce the hours of interaction.

It's not that it's that horrible, it's just being nagged constantly about everything makes you wish that one of you were dead.

[mkrtu9]

More applications I see in your future then

[mkrtu9]

they need a little Yoda smilie for times like these

[sandmangeck]

alright....in times like these, or any times for that matter. you call the job back and ask politely if they have reviewed your resume or application. find a friend and move out

[Araillac]

If I wasn't getting kicked out of the house I'm in now to move back in with my parents I'd offer to let you live here. Unfortunately for you, that won't be able to happen now. Sorry to give false hope but man anything to post right now. This new keyboard is awesome. Ooooh man, it's not even quiet key cause it was so cheap but I gotta say I love the sound of a loud keyboard when someone like me can type so damn fast. Ooooh this is nice.

[Thunderscreech]

Originally Posted by Araillac

If I wasn't getting kicked out of the house I'm in now to move back in with my parents I'd offer to let you live here. Unfortunately for you, that won't be able to happen now. Sorry to give false hope but man anything to post right now. This new keyboard is awesome. Ooooh man, it's not even quiet key cause it was so cheap but I gotta say I love the sound of a loud keyboard when someone like me can type so damn fast. Ooooh this is nice.

I need to be closer to Richmond than that.

[coreyfyfe]

step one:
http://richmond.craigslist.org/jjj/

step two:
http://richmond.craigslist.org/hhh/

They tend to work best when taken in combination.

Best of luck.

[Jiggybass]

Originally Posted by Thunderscreech

I'm working on the job part. It'd be REALY ****ING NICE if someone would call me back after I drop off my applications.

You gotta start calling THEM, and asking if they have reviewed your application and ask if an interview would be possible. This works ALOT better than waiting around complaining.

Ask me how I know

[TheWalrus]

All I can say is when you move out, don't do it like my oldest son did. His girlfriend decided they should live together and rather than discuss it with us, he moved his stuff out when nobody was home. They moved 75 miles from here into a crappy apartment with her cousin and his pregnant girlfriend. He quit his job working in the emergency room at a local hospital and now has no money, and no prospects. And did I mention that he only had one more semester before graduating from nursing school?

If/when you move out, be an adult about it.

[cassanova]

Originally Posted by Thunderscreech

Plus, Liberal Arts has too many boring rules. At least with what I'm going into (Architectural Drafting & CAD Tech Certificate programs) I can make cool stuff and not have to know how to analyze some writing to draw out whatever kind of meaning I want.

You're in for a huge surprise and wake up call because everything in life has many boring rules.

Not to sound cold-hearted, but I want to have some sort of Income. Warm fuzzy feelings make a damn poor substitute for food. If I had a job, I'd be more apt to volunteer my time to people who need help.

You're contradicting yourself here. Volunteering does not put food on the table because it does not provide the income you need but they do give that warm fuzzy feeling. Wanna help people? Then get a career in social services, human services, or psychology, even medicine. Then you can have that warm fuzzy feeling you get by helping others and it'll pay the rent.

I'm working on the job part. It'd be REALY ****ING NICE if someone would call me back after I drop off my applications.

The way it usually works is you submit job application, wait a few days, then you call them back and try to set up an interview. A lot of employers like persistence and it helps show them that you really want to work for them by taking a little initiative by picking up the phone and calling them back.

It's not that it's that horrible, it's just being nagged constantly about everything makes you wish that one of you were dead.

Well thats what parents do to their children that are of age to live on their own. My dad and I would fight on a daily basis until I found my own place.

To sum it all up, if you're that fed up like you're making it out to be then just get out there and do what you need to do to better your current situation.

As for moving out, it really is an easy process.

Find/keep job
Save money
Find apartment
Have phone and any utilities needed turned on
Pack boxes/rent uhaul or find friend with a truck
Move into new place and enjoy

[ThunderLizard]

Thunderscreech-
ThunderLizard's Job hunting rules of thumb:
If you're looking for work, make it your full time job and devote 8 hours a day to it.
Expect an application / contact ration of 10 to 1.
Apply for a wide range of jobs, even if they don't pay enough.
Accept all interviews and call backs so you're comfortable with the process.
When you get an interview, show up on time, be presentable, blah, blah, blah.....
Plan on spending one month of job hunting for every $10K of annual salary.
You might need a starter job to get the one you really want.
Once you're working, your job hunting might not be over.

But first off, you need to determine if you really want to accept the responsiblity of moving out, working and being on your own.