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02-25-2011, 12:04 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | | As a black guy who's "not a real black guy," my top 10 laments
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1. Why did I have to be one of the only two kids at the park (My brother being the other one) who can't jump high? And just because I can't jump high doesn't mean I can't play any basketball. I mean, I'm not very good, but that's beside the point. Kevin Love can't jump, either, and he be ballin'
2. Why do I have to be the only black guy at the park who the white guys and Asians feel comfortable talking to? And just because I'm black, doesn't mean I should be picked first for basketball. I mean I can pull down some rebounds, but I'm not all that good. I can't even jump high
3. "The Brothers Brothers" was a funny skit on In Living Color. Being called "The Brothers Brothers" isn't funny. 
4. You know why I don't have any Cross Colours/Jordans/Enyce? Cuz that crap's expensive. And I know your mom; she's broker than mine. Leave me and my tucked in polo alone and quit frontin
5. I don't wanna be a rapper. And no, I don't wanna sing the hooks on your song. Cuz I just don't want to. Leave me alone 
6. No, I'm not growing a flat top. I had one when I was 6. I'm not going back. And you look silly.
7. Stop laughing at the guy selling incense on the train. He doesn't want to work for "the man" no more than you do, but at least he's not robbin fools or standing on the corner.
8. When I cross paths with you and say "What's up," it's not a confrontation. Stop trying to look so hard all the time. Learn how to be nice and say "Hi" to people once in a while.
9. Tupac wasn't that good. Sorry...he wasn't that good.
10. Kwesi, how can you be a black guy who likes rock and doesn't like Bad Brains? You're not a real "not a real" black guy 
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex  I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! |
Last edited by macaroni tony : 02-25-2011 at 12:41 PM.
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02-25-2011, 12:08 PM
|  | Supporting Member | | Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Ohio | | | BWAAHAAAAAAA!!!!! Great post. |
02-25-2011, 12:11 PM
|  | That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it.. | | Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Robbinsville, NJ | | | Bestest lament yet!
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by 6jase5 Cleavage heals. | Quote:
Originally Posted by machine gewehr I happened to have a better experience, a peegasm. | |
02-25-2011, 12:12 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Relic Bestest lament yet! | Nah, yours was epic. I have been wanting to do this for a while, though. About a month of pent up oreo rage 
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! |
Last edited by macaroni tony : 02-25-2011 at 12:27 PM.
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02-25-2011, 12:26 PM
|  | that video LIES | | Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Northern California | | | You're not a real black guy? Are you inflateable? Imaginary?
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Fat Albert He who throws mud only loses ground. | |
02-25-2011, 12:32 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bassteban You're not a real black guy? Are you inflateable? Imaginary? | Beats me, man. I'm not the one that says it. I'm still trying to figure it out. Maybe CGI????? 
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! |
Last edited by macaroni tony : 02-25-2011 at 12:40 PM.
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02-25-2011, 12:41 PM
|  | Yeah, I've got the moves like Jagger. | | Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: G.R. MI | | | I think the Kid & Play stovepipe would be pretty dope on you.
Don't go dissin Kwesi, he's got a whole lot more of a "Real Black Guy" name than you do!
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by BassChalice Everybody pay attention to Phalex now! | Quote:
Originally Posted by champbassist My cat breath smelling a cat's odor is eating. | Quote:
Originally Posted by hover He's got the Moo OO OO OO OO OO OO OObs like Jagger.... | |
02-25-2011, 12:41 PM
|  | The Lowdown Diggler | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Huntington Beach, CA | | I'm calling you out on number 1. 
You're obviously jumping higher than any white guy right here. Although you might be in some trouble for your landing. |
02-25-2011, 12:44 PM
| | That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it.. | | Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Robbinsville, NJ | | Quote:
Originally Posted by MakiSupaStar I'm calling you out on number 1.
You're obviously jumping higher than any white guy right here. Although you might be in some trouble for your landing. |
LOL!!!!1one one lol11lulz!
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by 6jase5 Cleavage heals. | Quote:
Originally Posted by machine gewehr I happened to have a better experience, a peegasm. | |
02-25-2011, 12:45 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I think the Kid & Play stovepipe would be pretty dope on you.
Don't go dissin Kwesi, he's got a whole lot more of a "Real Black Guy" name than you do! | Haha, it did....in the 1st grade 
And no fair on Kwesi's name; he's African, so he gets a cool name by default Quote:
Originally Posted by MakiSupaStar I'm calling you out on number 1.
You're obviously jumping higher than any white guy right here. Although you might be in some trouble for your landing. | Eh, I had all the time in the world to power up and get my thighs ready. Plus there's no other dudes in the pic to compare me to
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! | |
02-25-2011, 12:48 PM
| | That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it.. | | Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Robbinsville, NJ | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I think the Kid & Play stovepipe would be pretty dope on you.
Don't go dissin Kwesi, he's got a whole lot more of a "Real Black Guy" name than you do! | See now Kwesi will also let you touch his hair if you ask nicely. He said so, that there is a big plus.
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by 6jase5 Cleavage heals. | Quote:
Originally Posted by machine gewehr I happened to have a better experience, a peegasm. | |
02-25-2011, 12:56 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: So Cal, USA | | Quote:
Originally Posted by macaroni tony 1. Why did I have to be one of the only two kids at the park (My brother being the other one) who can't jump high? And just because I can't jump high doesn't mean I can't play any basketball. I mean, I'm not very good, but that's beside the point. Kevin Love can't jump, either, and he be ballin'
2. Why do I have to be the only black guy at the park who the white guys and Asians feel comfortable talking to? And just because I'm black, doesn't mean I should be picked first for basketball. I mean I can pull down some rebounds, but I'm not all that good. I can't even jump high
3. "The Brothers Brothers" was a funny skit on In Living Color. Being called "The Brothers Brothers" isn't funny.
4. You know why I don't have any Cross Colours/Jordans/Enyce? Cuz that crap's expensive. And I know your mom; she's broker than mine. Leave me and my tucked in polo alone and quit frontin
5. I don't wanna be a rapper. And no, I don't wanna sing the hooks on your song. Cuz I just don't want to. Leave me alone
6. No, I'm not growing a flat top. I had one when I was 6. I'm not going back. And you look silly.
7. Stop laughing at the guy selling incense on the train. He doesn't want to work for "the man" no more than you do, but at least he's not robbin fools or standing on the corner.
8. When I cross paths with you and say "What's up," it's not a confrontation. Stop trying to look so hard all the time. Learn how to be nice and say "Hi" to people once in a while.
9. Tupac wasn't that good. Sorry...he wasn't that good.
10. Kwesi, how can you be a black guy who likes rock and doesn't like Bad Brains? You're not a real "not a real" black guy | Hey, without even looking first, I KNEW you were from SoCal, great post bud.
__________________
U.S Peavey Club Member #65 l Acoustic Club #89 l "I believe in spirits, I drink them all the time."
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02-25-2011, 12:57 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | Thanks 
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! | |
02-25-2011, 01:07 PM
| | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I think the Kid & Play stovepipe would be pretty dope on you.
Don't go dissin Kwesi, he's got a whole lot more of a "Real Black Guy" name than you do! | Right--he's "not a real 'not a real black guy'", so obviously he is a real black guy .
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark Latimour So you're saying that erroenous Trojans may ruin Kardashian's Bush?
This sounds like a serious situation to me. | |
02-25-2011, 01:08 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | ^ Right, disraeli. You're catchin my drift
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! | |
02-25-2011, 01:13 PM
| | Registered User
Endorsing Artist;Essential sound products,Dunlop, Ergo Instruments | | Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: chicago IL | | | Hilarious!
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02-25-2011, 01:18 PM
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Originally Posted by macaroni tony ^ Right, disraeli. You're catchin my drift | That said, not a real black guy or not, you've gotta like some Bad Brains. Then again, I'm about as "not a real black guy" as they come, so my perspective may be skewed .
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark Latimour So you're saying that erroenous Trojans may ruin Kardashian's Bush?
This sounds like a serious situation to me. | |
02-25-2011, 01:19 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Tustin, CA | | You're right, Disraeli. Long story short, Kwesi sucks. Imma make him change his sig 
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalex I'm happy for you, and Imma let you finish, but Princess Leia was the best hologram of ALL TIME!!!! | |
02-25-2011, 01:22 PM
|  | Bare Bones Bass Builder | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Denver, CO | | | I've got a buddy who's going to love this rant! Thanks!
__________________ "If any man says he hates war more than I do, he better have a knife, that's all I have to say." --Jack Handey www.inactivists.com |
02-25-2011, 01:24 PM
| | Registered User
Beta Tester: Source Audio. Hacker: Heavy Drone FX | | Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Spokane, WA. | | | That's more of a dive than a jump. | | Thread Tools | Search this Thread | | | | 
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