Can you be a parent and not a Hypocrite?

capnjim · #1 08-02-2011, 08:55 PM

Man, its killing me. My 11yr old son is a Gatorade addict. I buy him one a day and he wants more and will chug them down faster than I can buy them. We don't give him soda or lots of treats.
Just today, I was telling him how one a day is plenty, not to ask for more, meanwhile....I'm on my third beer!
What must he think? I do enjoy my brews and will drink a sixer pretty fast when I am working around the house.
Ouch, boy did I feel bad.
Is it OK to be a total hypocrite? Its really hard to lead by example!

Kwesi · #2 08-02-2011, 09:05 PM

Everyone is a hypocrite at some point or another.

carl h. · #3 08-02-2011, 09:06 PM

Shape up for the kid, and yourself. Think of the money you'll save, not to mention weight you'll drop.

Lesfunk · #4 08-02-2011, 09:09 PM

I don't really think your a hypocrite. When he pays for your beer he can tell you how many you can drink.
Besides you're his parent. You're allowed to have authority

**jmattbassplaya** · #5 08-02-2011, 09:11 PM

I'm not a parent myself, but I have helped raise my nephew at various points in time so take my opinion for what it's worth.

I don't think it's possible to be a parent and not be a hypocrite at times. It's in our nature as adults to steer our kids down better paths than we have taken. Sometimes that means we have to tell them to not do things that we do on a daily basis because we know it's bad (despite our choices to continue doing whatever it is we're doing). It might by hypocritical, but that doesn't mean we're wrong to give advice based off of our experiences and knowledge on various things.

fdeck · #6 08-02-2011, 09:13 PM

I would call it a double standard, rather than "hypocrisy." And it's OK to have double standards between adults and kids.

Chances are, Gatorade has the same caloric content as "soda or lots of treats."

Schlyder · #7 08-02-2011, 09:26 PM

Gatorade has tons of sodium... you should only be drinking it if you are replenishing salts and electrolites after exercise. Not for sitting around and drinking 3 -4 a day.

jallenbass · #8 08-02-2011, 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fdeck

I would call it a double standard, rather than "hypocrisy." And it's OK to have double standards between adults and kids

Absolutely.

Kwesi · #9 08-02-2011, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fdeck

I would call it a double standard, rather than "hypocrisy." And it's OK to have double standards between adults and kids.

A double standard is just a nicer way of calling something hypocrisy. Not that you're wrong to do so in this case but they are essentially the same thing when it's something that you instate yourself and not something completely out of your hands.

Kids learn A LOT from a parents actions, as I'm sure you know, so maybe it's time to cut back on the beer?

I don't honestly know if three a day is too much but I'd bet money that your kid has at some point thought "If he can do it, why can't I?"

Kwesi · #10 08-02-2011, 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Schlyder

Gatorade has tons of sodium... you should only be drinking it if you are replenishing salts and electrolites after exercise. Not for sitting around and drinking 3 -4 a day.

Big +1 to this. Gatorade is intended for athletes and people engaged in high-energy exercise, not as a regular drink. That said, one a day doesn't sound to bad so long as he is properly hydrated otherwise. However, if you are looking for an alternative drink that your kid might like check this out:

Tastes good, barely has anything in it and you just mix it with water.

anyonefortennis · #11 08-02-2011, 10:09 PM

Whoa folks - Anyone actually read the OPs question? OP did not ask "Should I cut back on my drinking?" or "Is gatorade bad for your kids?"

I'm pretty sure he is aware of what a lot of beer does to adults and he can certainly read the label on a gatorade bottle.

I think the point of discussion here is the infamous "Do as I say, not as I do". I think we all heard and hated that phrase as kids and started using it as soon as our kids were able to understand what we do.

sandmangeck · #12 08-02-2011, 10:15 PM

As a parent; the two go hand in hand.

Kwesi · #13 08-02-2011, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anyonefortennis

Whoa folks - Anyone actually read the OPs question? OP did not ask "Should I cut back on my drinking?" or "Is gatorade bad for your kids?"

Pretty much everyone in the thread so far has replied to the OPs question... and then added an extra 2¢ on top. Sounds about the same as any other TB thread

.

Munjibunga · #14 08-02-2011, 11:08 PM

My daughter and I both drink Propel.

MJ5150 · #15 08-02-2011, 11:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capnjim

Is it OK to be a total hypocrite? Its really hard to lead by example!

No. Yes, it sure is. For me, it's how you handle that teaching moment that makes you a hypocrite or not. No parent is perfect so there will be times when we teach our children not to do things we might have done.

In my opinion, it was hypocritical trying to teach your child when enough is enough as you showed no self control or restraint yourself in the same thing. But don't give up, do better next time. Your son is relying on you.

-Mike

Journey55 · #16 08-02-2011, 11:55 PM

You could always put something gross tasting in the gatorade a few times so he doesn't like it anymore, then you won't have to lead by example because he won't need one

LiquidMidnight · #17 08-03-2011, 12:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kwesi

Everyone is a hypocrite at some point or another.

+1

The key is to recognize when you're being a hypocrite and then take steps to become congruent with your actions and beliefs. (Hopefully that doesn't simply mean changing your beliefs

)

tastybasslines · #18 08-03-2011, 12:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carl h.

Shape up for the kid, and yourself. Think of the money you'll save, not to mention weight you'll drop.

I don't think 3 beers is out of hand, and how do you know he is fat?

Tituscrow · #19 08-03-2011, 03:14 AM

Would you feel bad if he wanted to watch some 18 rated zombie fest and you said 'no way', then settled down to watch it yourself? Of course you wouldn't...this is not much different, in that you are dad, and what you say goes.

We make judgements and decisions based on what we think is best for our kids. Sometimes this can be perceived as hypocrisy or double standards, but I dont think it is. Finding out/catching your kid smoking, going ballistic, then lighting up yourself in front of them IS hypocritical.

The skill is being able to have a proper conversation with your kid about why some things are ok for adults to do, and not children, without resorting to a "because I said so".

XtheDeadPawn · #20 08-03-2011, 03:55 AM

Hypocrisy? I was raised on it. When my dad went to college he was at the bar more than class he even had his mail sent there for crying out loud.

Me I was raised told that all drugs are bad (Including alchohol and skoal) and even the slightest amount could kill me (Obvioiusly BS) and even though I know that's BS and it's perfectly alright for me to do it now since I'm 21 I refuse. I'm straight edge (No drugs or tobacoo or alchohol).

I do indulge in Slurpees alot though. Like one every 3 days 40 oz's alot. MMMMmmmm Coke.

Anyways sorry had a Slurpee blackout where was I oh yeah. As far as being a hypocrite again it's your kid raise him how you want. All we ask is that you don't raise the next Charles Manson.