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09-06-2011, 09:00 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Fort Wayne, Indiana | | | Dealing with Borderline Personality Disorder
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My wife and I are fostering a 17 year old mother of an 18 month child. She has been diagnosed with BPD and while fairly early for that diagnosis, we feel it is accurate, based on our 2 year relationship with her. Obviously, she's in therapy and we're getting lots of insight from her therapist, but I'm seeking any insight any of you with experience in this area can offer as well.
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09-06-2011, 09:13 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana | | | I dont have any advice. But you are a saint! |
09-06-2011, 09:18 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: northeast Ohio | | | medication.
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I'm a weapon of mass distortion.
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09-06-2011, 09:19 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Fort Wayne, Indiana | | Quote: |
Originally Posted by sandmangeck I dont have any advice. But you are a saint! | Hardly... She's a sweet kid who's been handed a pretty lousy hand so far. We're just trying to give her some stability and love.
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Church Bassists Club #62, Extended Range Bass Club #137
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09-06-2011, 09:19 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Central Alberta | | | I'm afraid I don't have any information, but kudos to you for doing something like this. |
09-06-2011, 09:20 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Fort Wayne, Indiana | | Quote: |
Originally Posted by runmikeyrun medication. | There isn't really any for that disorder. It's all about therapy and behavior modification...
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Church Bassists Club #62, Extended Range Bass Club #137
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09-06-2011, 09:22 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Fort Wayne, Indiana | | | We've been in her life for 10 years, "parenting" her for 2, and the diagnosis was just last week. We are planning on adopting her ASAP as well.
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Church Bassists Club #62, Extended Range Bass Club #137
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09-06-2011, 09:27 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: northeast Ohio | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bradjonesbass  There isn't really any for that disorder. It's all about therapy and behavior modification... | Then make sure she sticks with the therapy and doesn't start drinking or doing drugs. That'll put anyone with a mental illness back to square one real quick.
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I'm a weapon of mass distortion.
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09-06-2011, 09:29 PM
| | | There are internet support groups for parents of children and teenagers with BPD and bipolar - my mother is a member of one. I'll see if I can get the name of it, just for reference's sake.
Edit: It's the Child and Adolescent Bipolar Foundation (they also have a lot of parents of children with BPD): http://www.bpkids.org/
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Originally Posted by Ed Friedland People say a lot of stupid ****. |
Last edited by Muaguana : 09-06-2011 at 09:36 PM.
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09-06-2011, 11:11 PM
|  | Supporting Member | | Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Ohio | | | Most mental health professionals will tell you BPD is one of the most difficult conditions to deal with. Best of luck to you. |
09-07-2011, 12:22 AM
| | | | Be more of a friend to her. Bipolar just means she has different personalities. Try to understand her, that's the most anyone asks for. |
09-07-2011, 12:25 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Dayton, Ohio | | | Westone bass
I got this bass for $100 .
It helped my personality.
She just needs a bass player for a friend...
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09-07-2011, 12:33 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Los Angeles | | | |
09-07-2011, 02:54 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Fort Wayne, Indiana | | Quote: |
Originally Posted by Byron92 Be more of a friend to her. Bipolar just means she has different personalities. Try to understand her, that's the most anyone asks for. | She's not bipolar, she's borderline. Severe childhood trauma, abandonment, and sexual, physical, and emotional abuse. She's disociative, and has a history of intense, short relationships that end abruptly and badly. She also fits almost all of the other criteria. She does, however display genuine compassion and empathy for other people and animals, and they've caught it very early, so there is a lot of hope for her.
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Church Bassists Club #62, Extended Range Bass Club #137
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09-07-2011, 06:33 AM
| | Supporting Member | | Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Ohio | | | Clearly Byron92 means well but has no idea what Bipolar is. Anyway, best of luck. It sounds like your daughter is going to have a wonderful, supportive family that will help her to deal with her BPD. She's very lucky to have you guys. |
09-07-2011, 06:41 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Alexandria Virginia | | Exercise and St John's Wort
Best of luck, you're a saint. 
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09-07-2011, 06:49 AM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Charlotte, NC | | | a good book to read is I Hate You, Dont Leave Me- my daughter has BPD and that equals alot of drama. Be careful that you and your wife dont get completely worn out or burnt out. |
09-07-2011, 08:14 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Fort Wayne, Indiana | | Quote: |
Originally Posted by searchfunction a good book to read is I Hate You, Dont Leave Me- my daughter has BPD and that equals alot of drama. Be careful that you and your wife dont get completely worn out or burnt out. | Also recommended by her therapist... Going out to get it today.
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Church Bassists Club #62, Extended Range Bass Club #137
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09-07-2011, 09:39 AM
|  | Sick and tired of being sick and tired. | | Join Date: May 2005 Location: Belfair, WA | | | One of the things my wife and I did for our foster/adopting kids mom was show her how parents are supposed to act, what a loving relationship is supposed to be like, not just with her kids but with each other - if you act like normal people around her and expect her to act the same it may help. Peer pressure does work...
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09-07-2011, 11:03 AM
|  | That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it.. | | Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Robbinsville, NJ | | | I think that the absolutely biggest part of the battle, is getting her to realize that she has this disorder. If she already recognizes this, then behavior modification and lifestyle changes are possible.
Many folks with related disorders externalize and never see or accept that they are the root cause of their issues.. then the viscous circle persists
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