Embarrassing Moments

[heroincredible]

We've all had them. Post any embarrassing moments you've had!

Back when I was 16, my parents and I went on a vacation to the Dominican Republic. The resort we stayed at had shows going on every night, often with audience participation. One night I get randomly pulled out of my seat (by a beautiful local girl ), along with several other guys. We go back stage until they call us out. It was a 'game show' of sorts, with the guys being paired with a girl and having to do tasks on stage. The audience then votes for the best one.

First task? Give the girl a lap dance. Lucky me, I get paired with a lady well into her 40s, who liked to grab I was the first one to go, and my parents were sitting in the front row cheering me on. That four minutes was the most fail I've ever had packed into four minutes in my life

[RWP]

Could have been worse.

[Mon Rominee]

Damn!

One of my "best moments" involved taking an impressive BM and then subsequently breaking the flush mechanism at the office toilet. The water kept running, but not "entirely" flushing. Didn't spill onto the floor mind you, but left my battle cruiser circling the bowl, over and over at 30 knots. It was surreal, and almost by sheer will on the toilet's behalf that the repair person must witness my "gift".

Heck, I wasn't going in to get it.

[scottice]

Originally Posted by Mon Rominee

One of my "best moments" involved taking an impressive BM and then subsequently breaking the flush mechanism at the office toilet. The water kept running, but not "entirely" flushing. Didn't spill onto the floor mind you, but left my battle cruiser circling the bowl, over and over at 30 knots. It was surreal, and almost by sheer will on the toilet's behalf that the repair person must witness my "gift".

That's why I know JUST ENOUGH plumbing to get by!

[heroincredible]

Originally Posted by Mon Rominee

Damn!

One of my "best moments" involved taking an impressive BM and then subsequently breaking the flush mechanism at the office toilet. The water kept running, but not "entirely" flushing. Didn't spill onto the floor mind you, but left my battle cruiser circling the bowl, over and over at 30 knots. It was surreal, and almost by sheer will on the toilet's behalf that the repair person must witness my "gift".

Heck, I wasn't going in to get it.

Incredible.

[WickedPissah]

One time after a dance in grade 8 (where my former band played, we ripped by the way), I went out for Chinese food with my date and a few friends, on the way up, we were in one of the kids' mom's car and some song, I think it was "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye comes on the radio, and im sitting next to my date in the car, and I STARTED TO ----ING SING THE SONG and i didn't know I was doing it. Oh, how akward. My 2 friends were in the back of the van, so I went like i was going to tie my shoe, but I looked back and said, "you're doin' great lads, don't stop talking until I say."

[jady]

Originally Posted by heroincredible

We've all had them. Post any embarrassing moments you've had!

Back when I was 16, my parents and I went on a vacation to the Dominican Republic. The resort we stayed at had shows going on every night, often with audience participation. One night I get randomly pulled out of my seat (by a beautiful local girl ), along with several other guys. We go back stage until they call us out. It was a 'game show' of sorts, with the guys being paired with a girl and having to do tasks on stage. The audience then votes for the best one.

First task? Give the girl a lap dance. Lucky me, I get paired with a lady well into her 40s, who liked to grab I was the first one to go, and my parents were sitting in the front row cheering me on. That four minutes was the most fail I've ever had packed into four minutes in my life

Embarrassing!?!?!?!?! That's a good weekend here!!!!!

[casualmadness]

I was in junior high. We were in the library for study hour (which in my school meant social hour). I had fallen head over heals for one girl in my class (can't remember her name anymore) but back then I was certain that she was the soul mate I had longed for. Anyway, she sat at a four person table with two other girls. I eyed the empty seat as I had eyed her for so long. I finally worked up the nerve to go over and sit down with them.

Now, everyone knew that I liked her. But I had never done anything asbout it. So when I approached the table, her friends began to giggle and snicker and point and generally do thier duties as friends of the object of my affection to make my moment as awkward as possible. Plus, I was a boy. So they were contractually obligated by the National Organization of Mean Little Girls to torture me to no end. But I digress...

I pulled the empty seat out and poured myself into it with a very suave and charming..."h-hey." I could see the stars in her eyes. Marveled at my obvious command of the English language and my mastery of greetign the opposite sex, she replied with a very matter of factly, "hey."

"What next?" I panicked..."The ice is supposed to be broken. We should be discussing children's names by now," I thought. But the silence was deafening.

So in standard casualmadness fashion, I began a series of whitty observations and antectdotes. I would win her with humor. Surely she would see how witty and clever I was and this would be my in.

My humor tactic worked mastrerfully. I had these girls laughing so hard that if they would have been drinking milk, it surely would have been pouring from thier noses. They were laughing, they were chortling, they were reduced to teary eyed blobs of comedic bliss. And since they were laughing (and since I was actaully pretty funny) I was also laughing.

And then it happened...somehow a sneeze snuck it's way into my laughing. I never felt it coming on, the way one usually feels a sneeze coming on. It was just as sudden as a deer in the middle of the street. I never had a chance to cover my mouth.

This sneeze was a particually violent one. From the bowels of my deepest parts I felt this one coming with the force of a tornado. And it seemed to split it's force between my mouth and my nose. The majority, sadly, went to my nose. And out it went carrying lots and lots of snot...all over the table, in front of three giggling girls, one of whom I was sure I would spend eternity with.

Their cries of "ewww" and "gross!" were heard throughout the entire school building. The only thing that I could do was put my head down and cover myself with my arms.

I'm talking about a lot of snot here folks. Much more than you are probably imagining...

She never spoke to me again. My friends and classmates didn't allow me to live that one down for quite some time. Thankfully I started high school the following year.

[Mon Rominee]

Originally Posted by casualmadness

This sneeze was a particually violent one. From the bowels of my deepest parts I felt this one coming with the force of a tornado. And it seemed to split it's force between my mouth and my nose. The majority, sadly, went to my nose. And out it went carrying lots and lots of snot...all over the table, in front of three giggling girls, one of whom I was sure I would spend eternity with.

Their cries of "ewww" and "gross!" were heard throughout the entire school building. The only thing that I could do was put my head down and cover myself with my arms.

I'm talking about a lot of snot here folks. Much more than you are probably imagining...

Oh MAN! I have one almost like that but involved a schoolbus....your account was amazing. I'm dying over here. I'm picturing a "rope" of snot from your nose to the table and midgets spelunking down it...am I close?

[jady]

Am I the only one who is eagerly awaiting Maki's contribution here?

[casualmadness]

Originally Posted by Mon Rominee

Oh MAN! I have one almost like that but involved a schoolbus....your account was amazing. I'm dying over here. I'm picturing a "rope" of snot from your nose to the table and midgets spelunking down it...am I close?

Very close. But more like...the midgets threw all of thier camping gear down first, on to the table (inflatable kayaks, tents, backpacks, cooking gear, bicycles, hiking sticks, repelling gear, rain gear, etc.) THEN they threw the rope down, got it anchored and began thier descent. It was more snot than I had ever seen come from one nose at one time. I'm still amazed.

[heroincredible]

Originally Posted by jady

Embarrassing!?!?!?!?! That's a good weekend here!!!!!

The worst part was being ridiculed by a girl I had met there










It was the good kind of ridicule though Totally foxy girl, I've got pics somewhere. I guess chicks dig guys who make fools of themselves.

[Mon Rominee]

Originally Posted by casualmadness

Very close. But more like...the midgets threw all of thier camping gear down first, on to the table (inflatable kayaks, tents, backpacks, cooking gear, bicycles, hiking sticks, repelling gear, rain gear, etc.) THEN they threw the rope down, got it anchored and began thier descent. It was more snot than I had ever seen come from one nose at one time. I'm still amazed.

Dude, I'd be lying if I said I didn't cry from laughter at that...

And in re:to the original post, I'd say that could be pretty embarrassing, especially in front of the 'rents, but what would have made it incredibly awkward is if you broke into a full-on perv-smile in front of yer Mum when the Cougar went digging...hahahaha. THAT would've sent me over the edge. But yer Mum cheering on the groping? You Sir have arrived. hahahaha

[jive1]

Originally Posted by casualmadness

funny @$$ story..........

Seems like a life changing moment for you.

I had a similar experience, but not as embarrasing for me. My freshman year of college, we were finished our dinners in the dining hall. Cooked green peppers was part of the menu for the day. I took one of the green peppers and mashed it in my hand, while discreetly telling my friends to "check this out". I look over at this girl named Jill, and said "Hey, I got something for you!" I took the mashed green pepper, and made like I was wiping my nose, and then smeared the green pepper onto her clean plate. Her and her friend walked away, while my friends and I were laughing hysterically.

We walk upstairs, back to our floor and we hear two girls throwing up in the bathroom. Yup, it was Jill and her friend. We began to laugh even harder, and I apologized profusely to Jill and let her know it was a green pepper, and not a snot.

[Vorago]

A recent one:

We were performing in a posh restaurant with ditto crowd on the xxth floor of a big building (totally unsuited for the venue, this happens more often than we'd like to), and before we were on there was a stand up comedian.

So, he starts his show and tells us he would like to play a game, for which he needed a volunteer. Someone hairy. This is were I started feeling unconfortable. I was sporting a beard at that time, shoulderlength hair...AND I made the mistake of sitting on the front row.

*You!*

Me: Noooooooooooo....

What did I have to do?

Imitate King Kong ffs. Big roar and thumping on the chest included...In front of 50 people, mostly snobs, who already looked at me like 'who let the hobo in?'.

Ugh, I hate these kind of situations.


At least the poshboys went home deaf and/or left early

[metallicafan18]

This wasn't really embarassing, but I felt stupid.



Last month, my band played at my school for the 8th grade celebration party. People were hitting beach balls around and one came up on the stage. So with the best brain I decided to kick it. Well, it hit the microphone, and knocked it over. The ball, once again was in front of me. So I kick it backwards with my heel. I hear the crowd go, "uhhhhhhhhh, haha!" I turned around to find that I had knocked over all of the bands water. I just laughed and told the singers Dad to wipe it up.

[KeithBMI]

I was at this water park when I was very young... Probably about 8 or 9.

There was this huge bucket... 100 feet in the air... That would fill up with water over a period of time and pour down on the kids. The sheer force of the water could knock you on your ass.

Well... The water came down and took my trunks off.

Pretty embarrassing.

[fourstringdrums]

Originally Posted by Mon Rominee

Damn!

One of my "best moments" involved taking an impressive BM and then subsequently breaking the flush mechanism at the office toilet. The water kept running, but not "entirely" flushing. Didn't spill onto the floor mind you, but left my battle cruiser circling the bowl, over and over at 30 knots. It was surreal, and almost by sheer will on the toilet's behalf that the repair person must witness my "gift".

Heck, I wasn't going in to get it.

That reminds of the time about 6 years ago when I was at my uncle's house. I hadn't been feeling well and needless to say I knew the bus was coming, but it just wouldn't start, if you get my drift. Finally after the driver walked 3 miles to the gas station, he was severely late and the bus came barreling toward the bus stop. So I use their bathroom off of the master bedroom. I do my business and flush when oh of course, my little gift from god, while not impressive enough to clog a toilet on its own, was enough to clog a toilet that had already been put 98% of the way there. Unfortunately in my case, water overflowed like Niagra Falls, sending it dripping through the floor into the basement below where the rest of my family was gathered (Their basement is finished but still just has an exposed ceiling so it made this easy).

Needless to say I didn't go back to their house until tomorrow when I have to revisit the scene of the crime.

[Mon Rominee]

Ok, here comes my coup-de-gras of embarrassing moments. Ok, not so embarrassing at the time, but looking back on it, it's pretty horrible.

I went to the beach with my sisters and Mom when I was 4 or 5-ish. At one point I had to go #2 (why do all my embarrassing moments involve BM's?) and went to the restroom building at the beach. Now, being probably the first time I've encountered this scenario (having to "go" away from home and not at someone else's house), I was not aware of what a urinal was (WHY is that toilet so high up on the wall?). So I dropped trou, climbed up and took a dump in a urinal.

What made it worse / embarrassing looking back was an older gentleman walking in and witnessing it and promptly walking back out. At the time it never occurred to me, tho I remember it plain as day. But in hindsight, I imagine I was the talk of the beach. Could explain why I'm so "pee shy" now.

Thanks Mom, for letting me fly solo. This is the FIRST time I've ever told ANYONE this. EVER.

Liberating.

[playinpearls]

before i married my wife, we decided to go to this conference at church. big conference, about 1000 people there. I had to work late, so i arrived at the conference late, and the guy was already preaching. I get in the conference room (set up like an auditorium) and my wife is sitting dead center, front row with an empty seat next to her, and then the two senior pastors of our church on the other side. So a couple of weeks earlier he was preaching about "there is a gift for everybody, and you need to just reach out and grab it" or whatever, so in the middle of the conference, for some reason, i walked right up the center isle to the front, walked past the two pastors and sat right next to them and my wife. So when I look over at them, they are both looking at me with this "what... the.. hell ...are you doing?" look on their faces. I turned beet red, and quickly scooted next to my wife, who was also doing the same thing almost...

as it turns out, one of the other pastors had gone to the bathroom right as I was entering the room, so i never saw him get up, and i just figured that my wife had saved me a seat. The other pastor came back, and was like "hey, where did you come from?" and we all just laughed...i think i was red for the rest of the night...

i was also wearing a pair of nasty, ripped up over-alls, cause i worked in a warehouse. so i probably looked like a serial killer.....and i had a mohawk.