funny ways you've got out of a ticket

D Rokk · #1 05-13-2009, 01:14 PM

when i was little i got my dad out of a ticket because i wound down my window and said "hi policeman why'd you pull my daddy over?"

apparently i was cute or something

a friend of mine was getting pulled over and he waved the cop around him and yelled out his window "go around, go around"

the cop was in tears laughing when he got to the window.. no ticket

and mine.. i accelerated thru a yellow light (illegal here in PA i'm assuming it is elsewhere as well) officer said the typical "do you know why i pulled you over" to which i answered the classic "no sir" he said "you accelerated thru a yellow light" i looked at him with my most serious face and said "officer i swear it was red when i went thru it" he laughed then told me not to do it again..

rap138 · #2 05-13-2009, 01:35 PM

Once my daughter was sleeping in the car and I was pulled over for changing lane with no indicators on, and the guy start giving me a lecture with quite a loud voice and I said "shhhhh please, my girl is sleeping" and stop the lecture and told me to go...sweet.

the best one when I was in Chile during the troubles (dictatorship) I took a wrong turn and went against traffic so I pulled off in front of a house really quick with screeching tyres trying to avoid oncoming traffic, the house happened to be a place were some judges lived so was heavily guarded by cops, one of them went in a jump to my window and put his machine gun against me and asked what the **** was I doing (in colorful spanish) so I said that I got it wrong and was trying to prevent major accidents by going there, I think the guy was so relieved that I wasn't going to bomb anything or kill him and his mates that just told me with quite a tremblimg voice "please go home" and let me go with nothing else said.

**cheezewiz** · #3 05-13-2009, 01:39 PM

The most often used one is, "Officer, I'm really sorry, but I have to go to the bathroom really bad". If it looks like the driver is in true distress, it usually works.

TrooperFarva · #4 05-13-2009, 01:40 PM

I studied NY state traffic law.

I'm not a laywer or anything, I just spent some time at the local law library reading up on state traffic law.

Not 'funny' really, but I did get my last 4 speeding tickets dismissed. Saved myself thousands in traffic fines and insurance costs.

Relic · #5 05-13-2009, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheezewiz

The most often used one is, "Officer, I'm really sorry, but I have to go to the bathroom really bad". If it looks like the driver is in true distress, it usually works.

LOL, I did use the "diarrhea" excuse one time. It worked incidentally, I think he was nearly ready to give me an escort home.
Then again it was also true.

D Rokk · #6 05-13-2009, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Relic

LOL, I did use the "diarrhea" excuse one time. It worked incidentally, I think he was nearly ready to give me an escort home.
Then again it was also true.

if they arent buying it ... just sh!t urself

Relic · #7 05-13-2009, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by D Rokk

if they arent buying it ... just sh!t urself

I actually told him something to that effect too. He asked if I was "sh***ng" him, I told him "no, I'm sh***ng myself!!" he laughed and told me get going but don't break any laws getting to the can.

Stanley Design · #8 05-13-2009, 01:48 PM

An alleyway punk party downtown behind a punk bar. About 30 punks drinking heavily and being rowdy. I had two quarts of captain morgans spiced rum and had just finished the first one and cracked the second one. One sip out of it and 10 cops come to raid the alley.

You know how they call empty beers dead soldiers? Well every single beer in the alley was opened and leaned up against the wall upside down. I had stashed my full quart behind a parked car as soon as I saw the cops, but one found it and went to pour it out.

I piped up, "Wait, that's mine, please please don't pour it out" and the guy looked at me, and my eyes started welling up with tears (That's $24 worth of booze and you can't buy any booze after 11pm.) He gave it back to me and said I'm lucky. I was the only one who didn't have their booze poured out. It was awesome. I got so drunk that night.

machine gewehr · #9 05-13-2009, 01:55 PM

My aunt used to be a FAST driver,she drove lot better then man,she liked showing off and she used to argue with man in the traffic.One time a man goes down to beat her,she yells (swore perhaps?) to the man and drives off.

I was aroun 5-6 when this happened.

She was pulled over due to an illegal U turn.We waited there for 15~mins,nothig happens,cops are stalling her for a piece o' bribe.She went berserk,she took the licence off the policeman and rushed to car yelling "you dirty +'%'!%!!s"she couldn't stand dishonesty like all our family.When she was about to start the car the policeman sticked his arm to reach the key.My aunt slapped him in the arm (or face?

) and burnt out.

Nothing happened,no charges or anything.

SteveC · #10 05-13-2009, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stanley Design

I was the only one who didn't have their booze poured out. It was awesome. I got so drunk that night.

That's sad.

**cheezewiz** · #11 05-13-2009, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveC

That's sad.

It's even sadder that a guy was drinking spiced rum.

**Mark Wilson** · #12 05-13-2009, 03:17 PM

Not to me. I've never been pulled over.

A friend was driving down a road going about 120km/h in about a 60 zone.
It was really late, and NO ONE was in miles.
So, a cop was sitting there. And my friend zoomed past him.
The cop pulled him over, and jokingly said "Well well. I've been waiting for you all night!"
To which my friend responded "Sorry Officer. I got here as fast as I could."

The officer laughed so hard he told him to slow down and get going.

**Mark Wilson** · #13 05-13-2009, 03:19 PM

Another story I've heard through a friend, was another friend was going about 120 in a 60 again. So the guy got pulled over, and his passenger was terrified.

The cop came to the window and trying to make a joke said "Alright boy, let me see your pilot's license"
So, the driver took out his Pilot's license, handed it to the cop, and the cops jaw dropped and told the guy to drive safer.

Jared Lash · #14 05-13-2009, 03:31 PM

My youngest brother just turned 21, so when I was 17 he was 7. I was picking him up from somewhere (soccer practice maybe) and was speeding when I saw the siren. I asked my brother if he could act sick.

When the officer strolled up I told him my brother wasn't feeling well and I wanted to get him home before he threw up. My brother was perfect - much better acting job than I expected from a 7 year old. He didn't oversell it or anything.

Officer let me go, saying I needed to keep it under the limit and I took my brother for ice cream as a reward.

MonetBass · #15 05-13-2009, 03:45 PM

I was speeding down the turnpike and got pulled over by the highway patrol. He asked "What's the hurry?" And I replied "I have all of the tuxedos for my sisters wedding and I'm running late." He glanced to the back of the van I was driving, saw that I was telling the truth, and said "Slow down a little. Carry on." Sweet.

Jared Lash · #16 05-13-2009, 04:52 PM

One of my former students was visiting from college and was told me this story. And knowing him I believe it completely.

He was driving back home for a weekend and was stopped for speeding on the freeway. It was a hot day so he was wearing a tank top and an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt. Turns out the officer pulling him over was a woman.

She walks up to the window to find he's pulling the strap of his tank top aside to expose his nipple. When she asked what he was doing he looked at her and calmly said, "I heard this gets women out of tickets."

The officer turned away from him but he said he could see she was trying unsuccessfully not to laugh because her shoulders were shaking. She apparently composed herself enough to turn around with a serious face only to see he was still flashing his nipple. She started openly laughing and just told him to go.

tplyons · #17 05-13-2009, 05:20 PM

Pulled over for going through a yellow light, I told the cop I was late on to the Chief's house for dinner. This chief was not exactly the laid back type who tolerated lateness. The cop told me I was lying, and just then the Chief called my cell phone, asking why I was late. I showed it to the cop who apologized and escorted me.

Other than that, I turned left through a yellow light, and the chief listening to the radio told him to get off my tail. It's easy when a black El Camino in my town is heard over the radio. Lights went on, went immediately back off, and the cop turned down the nearest side street.

I don't get pulled over often.

Gubna · #18 05-13-2009, 05:33 PM

apparently, I've avoided that never having had a driver's license

i_got_a_mohawk · #19 05-13-2009, 05:53 PM

My mum was going a bit over the speed limit once. She got waved to pull over by a policeman (with portable speed camera). She smiled and waved back, the first thought being that he was just being friendly. As we drove past all you could see was the guy shaking his head and laughing.

popinfresh · #20 05-13-2009, 06:01 PM

Threw up on them a bit.

Pulled over for going a little over the limit as I was feeling sick and either needed to get to a bit of bushes or home (close by).

When I told him I felt really sick he just turned back to get the breathalyser (it was middle of the day mind you) when I chucked guts out the window and got the side of his shoe/bottom of his leg a little.

Lucky he was a nice guy.