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08-27-2010, 04:19 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Florida | | | Hadron Collider would-be saboteur claims to be from the future.
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An interesting idea for a film, minus the Mountain Dew plot. http://crave.cnet.co.uk/gadgets/man-...ture-49305387/ Quote:
Man arrested at Large Hadron Collider claims he's from the future
A would-be saboteur arrested today at the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland made the bizarre claim that he was from the future. Eloi Cole, a strangely dressed young man, said that he had travelled back in time to prevent the LHC from destroying the world.
The LHC successfully collided particles at record force earlier this week, a milestone Mr Cole was attempting to disrupt by stopping supplies of Mountain Dew to the experiment's vending machines. He also claimed responsibility for the infamous baguette sabotage in November last year.
Mr Cole was seized by Swiss police after CERN security guards spotted him rooting around in bins. He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender.
Police said Mr Cole, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."
This isn't the first time time-travel has been blamed for mishaps at the LHC. Last year, the Japanese physicist Masao Ninomiya and Danish string-theory pioneer Holger Bech Nielsen put forward the hypothesis that the Higgs boson was so "abhorrent" that it somehow caused a ripple in time that prevented its own discovery.
Professor Brian Cox, a CERN physicist and full-time rock'n'roll TV scientist, was sympathetic to Mr Cole. "Bless him, he sounds harmless enough. At least he didn't mention bloody black holes."
Mr Cole was taken to a secure mental health facility in Geneva but later disappeared from his cell. Police are baffled, but not that bothered.
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Originally Posted by referring to the bassist from King Diamond He is 100 times the musician that Jerko was | |
08-27-2010, 04:22 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Iowa | | | "...baffled, but not that bothered."
i like that.
he sounds credible to me.
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08-27-2010, 04:23 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Joao Pessoa, Brazil | | | He disappeared from the cell using his wedding ring/time-space machine.
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Originally Posted by macaroni tony  ^ knows photoshopped cheeks chaff my willie | Quote:
Originally Posted by 5StringBlues Make way, or forsooth, thou shalt become my Shergold! | |
08-27-2010, 04:32 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: West Covina (LA), SoCal | | | Thats the best news article I ever read.
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08-27-2010, 04:35 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: May 2009 Location: kansas city, mo | | | look at the date...
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08-27-2010, 04:51 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Florida | | Quote:
Originally Posted by blendermassacre look at the date... | I'm posting from the past. 
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Originally Posted by referring to the bassist from King Diamond He is 100 times the musician that Jerko was | |
08-27-2010, 04:54 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Fredericksburg, Virginia | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bassrique I'm posting from the past. | I'll say...
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Returned in a limited capacity due to noise
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08-27-2010, 06:12 PM
| | Banned | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Maine/Vermont | | | 12 Monkeys, anyone? |
08-27-2010, 06:17 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: (M)a$$hole. | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Deluge Of Sound 12 Monkeys, anyone? | and if you forget one thing, I will have you shaved, sterilized, and destroyed!
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Don't tell me the sky is the limit, when there are footprints on the Moon.
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08-27-2010, 06:20 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Florida | | Quote:
Originally Posted by hover and if you forget one thing, I will have you shaved, sterilized, and destroyed! | I'll take the first two.
__________________ Quote: |
Originally Posted by referring to the bassist from King Diamond He is 100 times the musician that Jerko was | |
08-27-2010, 06:22 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: (M)a$$hole. | | | There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
<3 Dr. Evil.
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Don't tell me the sky is the limit, when there are footprints on the Moon.
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08-27-2010, 07:28 PM
| | | | I say we listen to this dude. If what he says actually happens, we're doomed. I mean, no poverty and kit kats for everyone? What kind of hell will our planet become?
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08-27-2010, 07:53 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Florida | | Quote:
Originally Posted by SMILEYSIXX I say we listen to this dude. If what he says actually happens, we're doomed. I mean, no poverty and kit kats for everyone? What kind of hell will our planet become? | Obviously a a communist chocolate hellhole.
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Originally Posted by referring to the bassist from King Diamond He is 100 times the musician that Jerko was | |
08-27-2010, 08:08 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: berkeley, ca | | | |
08-27-2010, 08:10 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: London, UK | | | the future sounds horrible. Not the one from the article - i mean in, general.
it's a well-recorded fact that the past sucked too, and the present is definitely below average. Time is basically a bad idea, conceived by idiots and executed by perverts. |
08-27-2010, 10:12 PM
|  | is, against all odds, still a scuba viking. | | Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Alta Loma, California | | Quote: |
The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening.
| I do believe that this will come to be known as the greatest sentence uttered in its decade.
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Originally Posted by Dr. Cheese It is never the duty of the oppressed to make a bigot feel comfortable. | |
08-27-2010, 11:44 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Finland (Northern Europe) | | Hi.
Tweed??? Now if he had been dressed as princess Leia, now that'd been something
Regards
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08-28-2010, 12:08 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Plano, Tx | | | "I'm hungry, I haven't eaten anything since later this afternoon." |
08-28-2010, 02:02 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Switzerland | | | I live four miles from the collider.
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Sadowsky - Markbass - SWR
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08-28-2010, 04:27 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Norway | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bmc I live four miles from the collider. | wow!! I must admit that that would be too close for comfort for me, I would have to do some serious research in quantum physics and particle accelerators before I could relax there. Did the property value go up or down in that district?
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