How do you escape "small town" USA?

powderfinger · #1 07-20-2011, 02:47 PM

I spent many of my formative years in and around Charlotte NC. However, I am living in a very small town, probably 2-3 hours from there now, in SC. This is where my family is from.

I have a college degree (BBA), but a very modest job, and honestly not enough to do more than pay for rent, gas, food, and lights. I live in a small to fair sized town. There isn't much opportunity here honestly. I have barely enough money in my bank account to pay bills. I wish I had up and left here when I was younger (before my mid 30s) like many of my old hs classmates did. But I was too busy focusing on music and travelling to other cities to play.

I have no "real world" connections, and prob. not even many musical connections anymore as I am not active in the scene any longer. There is a good ol' boys network here, as in other towns, and guess what.... I ain't one of the "good ol boys".

My question is how do you just up and leave somewhere? How do you find a job in a better location? I don't really know where to look. Almost everyone I still know lives in hicktown USA still. I have no connections in the "big city". Most of my classmates who left for the "big city" left 20 years ago and I have no connection to them any longer. I probably cant even picture some of their faces in my mind any longer.

Yep, most of my real friends were just "band bums" like me. So yeah... any suggestions? I dont have the money to move. I barely have the money to stay. Ive no connections. No resources, nothing....

MatticusMania · #2 07-20-2011, 02:54 PM

Why leave? Smalltown, USA is where its at! Just do your best to avoid the good ole boys. There are a lot of people in Largeburg, USA who would love to get away from it all and set themselves up in Tinyville, USA. Make the most oif your surroundings man! Enjoy the peace that one can't find Bigcity, USA.

powderfinger · #3 07-20-2011, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MatticusMania

Why leave? Smalltown, USA is where its at! Just do your best to avoid the good ole boys. There are a lot of people in Largeburg, USA who would love to get away from it all and set themselves up in Tinyville, USA. Make the most oif your surroundings man! Enjoy the peace that one can't find Bigcity, USA.

You missed something..... there is no opportunity here, dude. It's very poor here. In my town, almost 65% of the population is on some form of welfare. I am not here to judge them, but there simply isn't much here. Major plants have closed down on the outskirts of town (these plants employed thousands of peple, combined). Due to the high crime rate here, many of the decent folk have moved away. We just had new "projects" built here. My neighborhood is turning to section 8.

In other words... IM READY TO GET THE HELL OUT/

powderfinger · #4 07-20-2011, 03:02 PM

Also, there is no art, music, or real culture here either. Just meth houses, abandoned factories, projects, homeless people drunk in the streets....

I feel like one of the only college grads in town as well.. Id love to meet more people who are into art and music. Maybe it would help me fulfill my musical desires too. Just aint no culture down here in Mayberry.

MatticusMania · #5 07-20-2011, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

You missed something..... there is no opportunity here, dude. It's very poor here. In my town, almost 65% of the population is on some form of welfare. I am not here to judge them, but there simply isn't much here. Major plants have closed down on the outskirts of town (these plants employed thousands of peple, combined). Due to the high crime rate here, many of the decent folk have moved away. We just had new "projects" built here. My neighborhood is turning to section 8.

In other words... IM READY TO GET THE HELL OUT/

It really isnt any different in the big cities.

A lot of those people working the plants, they drove in from cities. The crime rate is often higher in big cities, mostly because there are more people living in a concentrated area. Project in the small towns probably trump anything you'll find in South Central LA.

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Also, there is no art, music, or real culture here either. Just meth houses, abandoned factories, projects, homeless people drunk in the streets....

Have you ever been to the city? Meth houses, abandoned factories, projects, homeless drunks in the streets... these things are ALL OVER the city. There might be some art and music interspersed in between, though.

MJ5150 · #6 07-20-2011, 03:09 PM

Pick your new town, go there, then suck it up and live in your car while you attempt to make it in your new town. Otherwise, stay where you're at. All I know is if you keep doing what you've been doing, you'll keep getting what you've been getting.

Sounds like your financially broke and unhappy anyway, so go be that way in some other town.

-Mike

powderfinger · #7 07-20-2011, 03:09 PM

Dude, I appreciate you trying to help me, but YOU ARENT helping me, dude. I want to move to a city with more opportunity, more music, and more culture. Does ANYONE have any suggestions on leaving? And maybe not even to a big city, but a smaller city like mine, but WITH more opporunity.

HOW DO YOU CONDUCT A MOVE WITH NO CONNECTIONS OR RESOURCES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

powderfinger · #8 07-20-2011, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MJ5150

Pick your new town, go there, then suck it up and live in your car while you attempt to make it in your new town. Otherwise, stay where you're at. All I know is if you keep doing what you've been doing, you'll keep getting what you've been getting.

Sounds like your financially broke and unhappy anyway, so go do it in some other town.

-Mike

Go live in my car? You sound like my baby boomer know it all, up by the boot straps father.

Anyone have any real advice?

macaroni tony · #9 07-20-2011, 03:13 PM

Good question....I'm assuming it's just you, right? No whiny women, or dependent children to worry about?

If so the only thing I could possibly think of is to get enough money for a Greyhound ticket out to LA or the big city of your choice and a couple months stay at a hotel , and spend your days at Home Depot with the day laborers and your nights at the local musician hubs. Assuming you want to get back into the scene...

Find a job somewhere buffing tables, or as a barback or valet guy or something...At least this is what I would do

macaroni tony · #10 07-20-2011, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Go live in my car? You sound like my baby boomer know it all, up by the boot straps father.

Anyone have any real advice?

My mom has lived in her car multiple times, and my brother is living in his car right now because he refuses to work for "The Man." And I'm not letting him move in with me

It can be done...

MJ5150 · #11 07-20-2011, 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Go live in my car? You sound like my baby boomer know it all, up by the boot straps father.

Anyone have any real advice?

Yes, I do.

Do you really think there is some city in the world full of good jobs and uber friendly people just waiting for you to move in? Nope, nada, zilcho, not a chance. If you want to be happy and successful on your terms, you have to MAKE it yourself and earn it. If that means packing up for your dream city and sleeping in your car, then you're going to have to do it. Or, you could wait by the phone until someone calls you with the dream job in your dream city with all kinds of cool people waiting to meet you.

While sleeping in your car may be extreme, you already said you are financially broke with no opportunities to change that, so you might as well hitch up your wagon and move out. What are you going to do, stay in SC until something magical happens and you have all the money you need?

-Mike

Relic · #12 07-20-2011, 03:19 PM

Can we trade? Shoot, I would LOVE to live in a small town. I'm sick of hustle and bustle I really am

Selta · #13 07-20-2011, 03:19 PM

So, I moved from Pennsylvania to Washington basically on my own - only had one friend here on the receiving end. It's not easy.
Basically, you'll want to start to narrow down places where you have career opportunities. Not all cities are created equally. Once you do that, start looking at the market there, evaluate the cost of living, how housing is, things like that. There are a LOT of resources online for this kind of research.
After you've picked your place, start applying to jobs. You're going to have to have a strong resume / cover letter, as relocation is often a hurdle you'll be jumping over when looking for jobs out of state.
While you're applying, start planing your move. You'll need to start getting quotes on moving _everything_ you own. Your vehicle(s), all of your stuff in your house/apartment etc. It's a lot to think about. You'll also likely want to sell all the stuff you don't need or want - which is good as that can help offset the cost of the move itself.
Don't quit your current gig until you have a new one lined up - offer letter in hand and ready to accept, based on your previous research.
Turn in your notice... this is where the fun is. I gave two weeks notice, so I had two weeks to arrange the movers (I did this the same day I gave notice, since I had it planned out), find the exact place I wanted to live (which meant flying here and viewing the apartments in person - something you SHOULD do for sure), and get myself out here - I drove my car out here, so I had about 2 days worth of driving to get done, too. Then you get here, unpack everything and start settling in.
Depending on how much of a social butterfly you are and how much you "need" friends, well, start hitting up local shops/scenes that you enjoy. If you like gaming, find the local gaming places... if you like theatre, go there. Etc. etc.
If you have any specific questions, feel free to ask me. I did it three years ago, but I certainly haven't forgotten the experience.

Pilgrim · #14 07-20-2011, 03:22 PM

The first thing to do is connect with your college's alumni association and find out what job placement resources they have. Many of them are connected to the college's placement centers. Use that resource and start looking.

I can't believe you don't use the Internet..

Open a google search window and type in 'Job hunting". Hit Enter. Follow links.

....have you heard of Monster.com?

Also, check websites for larger city newspapers...many of them will have job listings.

If none of these ideas have occurred to you, then I suggest you need to spend more energy thinking about what you're doing.

powderfinger · #15 07-20-2011, 03:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by macaroni tony

My mom has lived in her car multiple times, and my brother is living in his car right now because he refuses to work for "The Man." And I'm not letting him move in with me

It can be done...

Well, Im downing anyone who has had to live in their car.It could happen to anyone. But I *do* have a job right now that pays the bills. Hell, I have a car, and a car payment. I cant just get on a bus or live in my bar. How would I pay my car note? My car insurance? My meds?????? I have a special condition I have to take meds for yes, and a Dr. If I quit my job, HOW WOULD I AFFORD MY MEDS AND DOCTOR!

Cmon be realistic.

MatticusMania · #16 07-20-2011, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Dude, I appreciate you trying to help me, but YOU ARENT helping me, dude. I want to move to a city with more opportunity, more music, and more culture. Does ANYONE have any suggestions on leaving? And maybe not even to a big city, but a smaller city like mine, but WITH more opporunity.

HOW DO YOU CONDUCT A MOVE WITH NO CONNECTIONS OR RESOURCES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Im helping a lot more than you realize. If you arent willing to take a risk (which it sounds to me like you are not) then the best thing for you is to stay put and create your own happiness. Otherwise, this:

Quote:

Originally Posted by MJ5150

Pick your new town, go there, then suck it up and live in your car while you attempt to make it in your new town. Otherwise, stay where you're at. All I know is if you keep doing what you've been doing, you'll keep getting what you've been getting.

Sounds like your financially broke and unhappy anyway, so go be that way in some other town.

is the only way youre going to make it out of your situation.

It sounds to me like youre dreaming too big, thinking that moving to the city is going to make your dreams come true. Im trying to awaken you to the reality that things are the same, no matter where you go. Youre not going to be any happier in a city, aside from the fact that there may be a few more musical opportunities available to you.

Since youre not ready to take this risk, I suggest you go the easier route, and try and bring an art & music scene to where you currently reside. How far away is are your neighboring small towns? Perhaps yours can be the place those people go who are looking for something similar.

beggar98 · #17 07-20-2011, 03:24 PM

What kind of work do you do?

macaroni tony · #18 07-20-2011, 03:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Well, Im downing anyone who has had to live in their car.It could happen to anyone. But I *do* have a job right now that pays the bills. Hell, I have a car, and a car payment. I cant just get on a bus or live in my bar. How would I pay my car note? My car insurance? My meds?????? I have a special condition I have to take meds for yes, and a Dr. If I quit my job, HOW WOULD I AFFORD MY MEDS AND DOCTOR!

Cmon be realistic.

Heck, you wanna skip town, you gotta rough it. Ain't no easy way, man. Do what you gotta do for money until you find the job you really want, like I posted back on #9. Come on dude, you know this

MatticusMania · #19 07-20-2011, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by powderfinger

Well, Im downing anyone who has had to live in their car.It could happen to anyone. But I *do* have a job right now that pays the bills. Hell, I have a car, and a car payment. I cant just get on a bus or live in my bar. How would I pay my car note? My car insurance? My meds?????? I have a special condition I have to take meds for yes, and a Dr. If I quit my job, HOW WOULD I AFFORD MY MEDS AND DOCTOR!

Cmon be realistic.

YOU be realistic. Remember, you asked for this advice, sorry it doesnt seem to fit into the ideal paradigm you hoped it would.
Based on this post alone, you are not adequately prepared to move out of your town. Youre better off doing as I suggested, and starting a scene in your own area.

Pilgrim · #20 07-20-2011, 03:32 PM

Everyone is missing a point.

The OP has an Internet connection or he wouldn't be posting here.

If he's not already surfing the Internet for job listings, you have to wonder if he has any initiative, as this is not a question that most people need to ask. My answer above only stated the obvious.