How do you feel about body modification?

[oniman7]

Just had this discussion with my girlfriend...

We're both 16. I have no piercings, no tattoos, and plan on getting very few if any at all. She has 8 piercings (6 ear, one lip, one belly button ring), and wants many more and many other things including a full sleeve she's working up.


We take completely different sides on the issue. I feel like a person's body is pure, and at least in her case, no man-made replacement could be better than any detail on the body she has. I think piercings should be used tastefully and sparingly, and I hate the idea of random tattoos. For instance (no offense meant to anybody) I have met people with things like Gary the Snail met on their arm. I understand that's a very personal choice and I don't judge anybody. But I could never do something like that unless it was a huge part of my life, like if I had worked on the project. It makes me legitimately sad to think that she wants to cover up her skin and change her body, and give it up to a point where it will never be pure again. Certain things have very strong value, and I believe in modification being used in very strong moderation because of the parts of your body you have to sacrifice for the expression.


She, on the other hand, plans to get many things done when she's older. She's a hopeful tattoo artist/body piercer, but wants to have many things done I consider extreme. For instance, Dahlia/Septum/Snake bite piercings (all of which I find repulsive on 9 out of 10 people who get them), large gauges in her ears (which I have no problem with up to a certain level), scarring, subdermals, corsets, and things like Suspension.


There are two very separate, valid sides to this. I'm a little biased because I'm a queasy person (I passed out when getting blood drawn and since then the slightest bit makes me queasy). But I also believe in the purity of such a beautiful body... or anyone's really, especially in youth and good health. I feel like if, say, you get a sleeve covering your arm, your arm will never be your pure original arm again. I'm not 100% against the idea, but for me, it would have to have extreme sentimental or other personal value, and I would still be upset for the permanent change of the skin underneath it. Once again, I think moderation is the key, especially if there is something you want to carry with you all your life.
Also, I think it's a really cool art form. I fully support her doing all the modification she wants on other people, but makes me upset to consider her doing the same.


She wants me to understand the passion she has for it. Because I'm not her, I can't provide the justification I do for myself.


I wanna ask TB what personal stance they take... those against it, those who want to do it but haven't, those who have made a life out of it, and everywhere in between. Tell me why you made the choices you did regarding it.

Also, people who agree with both my viewpoint or hers, please contribute so maybe we can begin to understand each other a little better, or at least understand some important underlying concepts with the help of other people.

[Mark Wilson]

Small tasteful piercings I can take. My girlfriend has her... whatever the thing in your nose is called. A septum i think and has a ring in it. She keeps in tucked inside her nose when she needs to, but occasionally she keeps it out. Tasteful.
She has ear piercings which are all nice.

But, i HATE tongue piercings. And body piercings. Things like... suspensions, and corsets and large gauges I do NOT get. Makes no sense. Why would you want to RUIN your body for the rest of your life? You're going to be 60 and your earlobes will double as suspenders.

I dunno. I have one small tattoo, and no piercings. Never will happen, either.

[Stilettoprefer]

Once I have kids (far in the future at this point) I plan to get a tattoo with their names on my shoulder. If I lost a family member or close friend that was a huge part of my life, I would get a tattoo dedicate to them.

Peircings, I would never have done to myself. My girlfriend has 2 in each ear and that looks good on her. Her mother has a nose piercing and it looks good on her! Some people can pull off gauges, but there's a point where it just gets discusting.

[scotty g]

Well, you guys are 16... Whatever she wants to do, let her do. You crazy teens don't like to be told what not to do.... so until she has an epiphony, she probably won't change her plans for her future.

That being said, if you can't get past the way someone looks, or specifically, the way she wants to modify her body, just remember, you're only 16. I didn't meet my wife until we were 22. She has 3 tattoos, I have 7. I'd love her just the same if she had 40 tattoos. For now, just enjoy your teenage years!

[IconBasser]

Some look awesome, some don't. It depends upon both the body mod and the person getting it.

In general, I usually think that body modifications improve people's overall aesthetic, unless it's something like a really crappy prison tattoo.

[colcifer]

[Raven2k360]

I personally feel that it's each individual's choice, regardless of what I think. I've seen girls that are all tatted up and several piercings that I thought were just as hot as a girl with no piercings or tats. I personally don't mind it either way, though some piercings I still have a distaste for. Things like septum piercings or massive ear gauges...but most other facial piercings that used to bother me don't anymore.

As for my own body, I currently have 3 tats, 3 ear piercings (one each lobe and one cartilage), my eyebrow, and my tongue. When I was 16, I thought tongue piercing was retarded and swore I'd never do it...that went out the window when I was 22...lol. Before that, I had done my eyebrow myself, but had to take it out....and for some strange reason, ever since I was a kid I'd have the on-and-off urge to get my ears pierced...usually set in when it was the 'cool' thing to do at the time. *shrug*

I guess my point is, you're only 16...your personal views may (and most likely will) change as you get older and gain more life experiences. Mine did. Oh, and I plan on getting more tats also...maybe even a few more piercings.

[MakiSupaStar]

How do I feel about body modification? A little lumpy.

[Munjibunga]

Originally Posted by oniman7

I feel like a person's body is pure, and at least in her case, no man-made replacement could be better than any detail on the body she has.

I'm with you 1,000 percent on this. I've gotten in trouble here before for sharing my views on what I think would motivate people to get tattoos and piercings, so I'll save it this time. But imagine what you will.

[tekdiver500ft]

(Voice of experience, here)
People who mutilate like this have some serious, deep-seated issues. While they can be fun and astoundingly sexy in the short term, you do NOT want to be in a long term relationship with someone like this. Run, don't walk, away from this girl. If you stay with her, she will eventually ruin your life, and mess up all future relationships, too.

Don't misunderstand, I have tattoos, I have my ears pierced. These types of small, tasteful modifications are generally merely self-expression, and may/may not be signs of problems. However, when people start using gauge, or piercing/branding their bodies extensively, or have more than a few tattoos, then it is an issue of which one should be leery.

[scotty g]

Originally Posted by tekdiver500ft

(Voice of experience, here)
People who mutilate like this have some serious, deep-seated issues. While they can be fun and astoundingly sexy in the short term, you do NOT want to be in a long term relationship with someone like this. Run, don't walk, away from this girl. If you stay with her, she will eventually ruin your life, and mess up all future relationships, too.

A little harsh, but similar to what I was trying to get at. The OP is 16 and young. He needs to enjoy his teenage years and learn and grow. Use this time for new experiences and figuring out that you really shouldn't try to change someone. Accept her for who she is, what she looks like, and what she thinks, or move on.

[Metal Matt]

I have 1 inch earlobes, an industrial in my left ear, two cartilage in my right ear and a 6 gauge septum that I usually wear a huge spike in. Body modification is great. But at 16, both your minds may change drastically about this stuff and the more you hold off and wait on, the better. I got my first piercings, my earlobes, when I turned 18, got all the cartilage stuff in the next couple years time while stretching my ears. For some reason I couldn't jump into the septum as fast, but after thinking about it on and off for a few years, I finally went for it, got it pierced at a 12 and stretched to a 6 in a few months time. Wait this stuff out and don't rush into anything too drastic or permanent until it's been given serious thought.

Originally Posted by Mark Wilson

But, i HATE tongue piercings. And body piercings. Things like... suspensions, and corsets and large gauges I do NOT get. Makes no sense. Why would you want to RUIN your body for the rest of your life? You're going to be 60 and your earlobes will double as suspenders.

I don't care what others think of how I look now, I won't when I'm 60. You see it as ruining your body, some see it as an expression of the idea that this body is my own and I will do with/to it what I please and I certainly won't let anyone else define what's right and wrong for me. To me body modification marks me as someone who inside, is not your normal average "mainstream" American. I don't and never did share the morals, ethics, interests, attitude of popular/average/mainstream culture, so out of that has come my interest in body mods. Just like out of recognizing those differences came my interest in underground heavy music as well. To me, hardcore, punk, doom, stoner rock, all things underground and heavy... it's the music of people who collectively went through similar experiences of growing up with significantly different mindsets than that of your average person, it's the music of the very broad subculture that sprang up out of that difference and for some, body modification is their mark.

Then again, some people go into body mods for purely superficial reasons and they're the ones that will end up regretting it in the end...the ones who never put any thought about what it means because it never meant anything more to them than, "it looks kewl", in the first place.

[Metal Matt]

Originally Posted by tekdiver500ft

(Voice of experience, here)
People who mutilate like this have some serious, deep-seated issues. While they can be fun and astoundingly sexy in the short term, you do NOT want to be in a long term relationship with someone like this. Run, don't walk, away from this girl. If you stay with her, she will eventually ruin your life, and mess up all future relationships, too.
.

No. Just no.

[Johnny BoomBoom]

I guess I'm in an 'each to their own' kinda position on this!

I have 4 tattoos so far - two armbands and two others above the armbands on my shoulders. I have 3 peircings - one ear lobe and both nipples.

I have a collar and tie job, so all tattoos are covered by a short sleeved shirt, as are my nipple piercings, and my earring isn't worn during the week.

Not a big fan of facial piercings - I have no desire to have a face like a portcullis - although sometimes, some subtle piercings can be OK..... Not a fan of these flesh tunnels people get in their ears......I'm sure some are so stretched you could drive a truck through them....but again each to their own!

I know I'm not finished with tattoos, but I'm pretty sure I'm done with piercings. But I take my time with these things and don't rush into anything without considering how I'm gonna feel about it when I'm 70!!!

Oh, I'm 41 now and had no tattoos until I was 28! In fact I didn't even get my ear pierced until I was 21....

Now, I'm gonna be honest here - I had to google a few of the things you mentioned.....and I have to admit that things like suspension and corsets are now also in my 'too wacky for me to try' bucket!

Back to you and your g/f....well, you are both still real young...and I guess time will tell if you guys are gonna be together for ever or not. You both have a lot of living still to do. From my experience of life though, I will say this....people live their lives happier, if they are allowed to be themselves all of the time and are supported by those around them for who and what they truly are. If you can't be you or she can't be her and be accepted by the nearest and dearest....things ain't gonna have a happy ending......

[Strohsx]

Originally Posted by tekdiver500ft

(Voice of experience, here)
People who mutilate like this have some serious, deep-seated issues. While they can be fun and astoundingly sexy in the short term, you do NOT want to be in a long term relationship with someone like this. Run, don't walk, away from this girl. If you stay with her, she will eventually ruin your life, and mess up all future relationships, too.

Don't misunderstand, I have tattoos, I have my ears pierced. These types of small, tasteful modifications are generally merely self-expression, and may/may not be signs of problems. However, when people start using gauge, or piercing/branding their bodies extensively, or have more than a few tattoos, then it is an issue of which one should be leery.

HAHA!
Say that to my wife!

...actually her sister is bat **** crazy and has less tattoos but they are scattered an random.

SO you may be on to something, not how many but how random or stupid.

[i_got_a_mohawk]

Personal choice.

Some people like them.
Some people don't.

Some people like lots of them.
Some people like a few of them.


It generally doesn't bother me, as long as they don't have a face full of them! I like tattoos, I have a number of them (many you probably would find in ill taste as they aren't Koi or Tribal ). Piercings, I don't think I'll ever get one. Never liked the concept of a bit of metal sticking through me, plus they wouldn't play well with my other hobbies. Girls with piercings? Not a problem as long as long as it isn't too insane. (admit that I'm not a fan of flesh tunnels tho).

[Akami]

I'm with Munji, Mark & Mark. (Sounds like a company name...)

Anyone that does anything to affect their appearance is trying to fit into a demographic they like the idea of belonging to, and people who do the piercings and tattoos to be different aren't different at all - they're just choosing a different demographic and not unique as much as they like to think they are, which is why they keep shooting for the one-upmanship of going ever further and further, much like any other addiction.

A couple tats, a couple piercings? Maybe it's just something they like, but the ones that go fullbore are out for a reaction so that they can react in return.

Unpopular opinion I'm sure, but true nonetheless.

[Chebass88]

If you don't like them, you will split up. No matter how PC you try to be, you either find her attractive WITH modifications or don't. Use your gut instincts on this one. It is nice to poll what anonymous people on the internet think, but it is your decision.

[i_got_a_mohawk]

Originally Posted by Akami

I'm with Munji, Mark & Mark. (Sounds like a company name...)

Anyone that does anything to affect their appearance is trying to fit into a demographic they like the idea of belonging to, and people who do the piercings and tattoos to be different aren't different at all - they're just choosing a different demographic and not unique as much as they like to think they are, which is why they keep shooting for the one-upmanship of going ever further and further, much like any other addiction.

A couple tats, a couple piercings? Maybe it's just something they like, but the ones that go fullbore are out for a reaction so that they can react in return.

Unpopular opinion I'm sure, but true nonetheless.

If it's opinion, it's speculative

Each to their own, differences are what make the world interesting.

[ugly_bassplayer]

Ah yes, the infamous talkbass tattoo thread, always tons of fun.....