I got issues and need advice

[Muusers]

Here we go, these things have been on my mind lately, and i really don't know what to do.

1) A couple of days ago i got dumped by my dancepartner (not love interest or anything). We've been dancing for 4 years now and even competed in the Dutch national championships. All was well till her boyfriend decided to dump his dancepartner. I can understand why he did that because she was basically a b****. But now he wants to dance with my dancepartner. I can also understand why because she's his girlfriend. Now my dancepartner, Josephine, has had a really hard time deciding with whom to continue, and I really don't blame her for choosing her boyfriend. But it still sucks. She's a sweet girl and I really don't want to say to her that she can't just dump me. I mean, she even got sick from making the decision and I do want to stay friends and stuff. But for now my ballroom dancing days seem to end prematurely.

2) Some of you might remember a thread that I started over a month ago, "I'm soaked but it was worth it", was the title. Well since then things haven't been so great. Actually, I think it's been crap. I more and more get the feeling that she's keeping me on a leash, just giving me attention when she feels like it/needs it. One part of me just wants to swear at her and the other part wants to tell her that I like her. But honestly, I think she doesn't know what she wants. She's still got feelings for her ex, even though she denies it. Because whenever he's around she's always just a tad more exhilirated than normal. Even her best friend says to her that they still like eachother so she should stop denying. On the other hand, whenever we're together in a group she always draws towards me. We even fell asleep together on a couch one time. A few friends of ours already thought we had a relationship because we were so attached to eachother. Maybe I should just tell her I like her and get it over with...

3) I'm starting my study Mechanical Engineering at the Technical University Delft, but as the starting date draws closer I'm getting less and less enthousiastic about starting. I have to start all over since none of my friends are going there and even though I know I'm gonna be alright, it just scares me going there. But I guess I'm feeling that way because of the other problems stated above.

Thanks, it's been a relief getting this out of my system.

[fitbass3p]

It sounds like it's a good time to close one page of your life, and start writing down the next chapter. It'll be hard for a while when you get to a new place, but that gives you the chance to change anything and everything that you want to.

Cheers,
Nick

[fenderhutz]

Hopefully since they have gotten a proper diagnosis they can put you on the right medication and resolve the issues you have had.

[Stumbo]

1) This is out of your control. Time to move on.
2) She likes your company while she's with you. Other than that, you're just a warm body.
Time to move on.
3) Since you're going to be at the University studying, you need to leave all this emotional drama behind and get control of yourself. Your studies will need 100% of your attention.

All this other is just temporary, so try not to worry about it too much. At college you will be meeting new people, new challenges and generally having a great time growing into the person you will become. You will gain some perspective and some breadth and depth to your views on life.

At college, there will be opportunities to meet many women. Part of being successful with the women is learning to speak up: check out my sig. and live by it.

Good luck.

[PSPookie]

I mostly agree with what Stumbo said but the best advice I can give you is this:
Don't put too much stock in advice you get from strangers on the internet.

[SpectorBass308]

Originally Posted by PSPookie

I mostly agree with what Stumbo said but the best advice I can give you is this:
Don't put too much stock in advice you get from strangers on the internet.

Hey guys, I hear microsoft is about to jump off the charts!

[Obe]

Is it possible to get another dance partner since it seems that you enjoy the dancing?

[Vorago]

Originally Posted by Muusers

Here we go, these things have been on my mind lately, and i really don't know what to do.


2) Some of you might remember a thread that I started over a month ago, "I'm soaked but it was worth it", was the title. Well since then things haven't been so great. Actually, I think it's been crap. I more and more get the feeling that she's keeping me on a leash, just giving me attention when she feels like it/needs it. One part of me just wants to swear at her and the other part wants to tell her that I like her. But honestly, I think she doesn't know what she wants. She's still got feelings for her ex, even though she denies it. Because whenever he's around she's always just a tad more exhilirated than normal. Even her best friend says to her that they still like eachother so she should stop denying. On the other hand, whenever we're together in a group she always draws towards me. We even fell asleep together on a couch one time. A few friends of ours already thought we had a relationship because we were so attached to eachother. Maybe I should just tell her I like her and get it over with...

3) I'm starting my study Mechanical Engineering at the Technical University Delft, but as the starting date draws closer I'm getting less and less enthousiastic about starting. I have to start all over since none of my friends are going there and even though I know I'm gonna be alright, it just scares me going there. But I guess I'm feeling that way because of the other problems stated above.

Thanks, it's been a relief getting this out of my system.

Well, on that second point, if I were you I'd distance myself from her. I've been there myself. A girl that kinda uses you as an attention backup when she's having trouble with her (ex) BF. One moment she's close with you, the next one she doesn't look at you. You keep hoping she'll choose you, but I think she never will, you're probably a 'true friend' or something like that, not BF material. If she really breaks up with her ex and engages in a new relationship she'll probably go with someone 'new', not you.

Which leads me to the third point. Go for it! Take the plunge, you'll be fine. Plus, that girl will be out of your life, and, out of sight = out of mind. You'll be over her in less than a month

Ni bleite!

[MakiSupaStar]

Sounds to me like there is only one thing you can do. Stand atop the tallest building in your town and shout into the wind I just wanna dance!

[Sig Saucer]

Put your education before any girls that may ruin your life.

[Jiggybass]

Originally Posted by Muusers

Here we go, these things have been on my mind lately, and i really don't know what to do.

3) I'm starting my study Mechanical Engineering at the Technical University Delft, but as the starting date draws closer I'm getting less and less enthousiastic about starting. I have to start all over since none of my friends are going there and even though I know I'm gonna be alright, it just scares me going there. But I guess I'm feeling that way because of the other problems stated above.

Thanks, it's been a relief getting this out of my system.

I can't help you with the others, but I can help you with this one.

I'm also moving away to college tomorrow, the only hard thing is that I know no-one at this college, so pretty much I have to start all by myself, not even my parents are available to help me move in. So it's pretty scary to be doing this all myself. I think that starting off fresh this way is great in a way, because if no-one there knows you, you get a chance to make a fresh start at the life you want, and not always stuck with the old people.

Good luck!

[GeneralElectric]

You've got an issue, here's a tissue.