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05-11-2008, 11:53 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Metro Detroit, Michigan | | | If you ain't down with Porkins... You ain't nothin'
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PORKINS IS STAR WARS. Without Porkins, the movie just wouldn't be worthwhile. I mean, this guy had flames on his helmet and he even refused to wear his chin strap... Could he be much more of a badass? I think not.
Here are all of Porkins' lines from the movie! Quote:
"Red Six standing by."
"I'm right with you, Red Three."
"I've got a problem here."
"I can handle it."
"No, I'm all right. Aaaaarrrrrgh!!!
| Here's a frame by frame of the mighty Porkins' demise:     
Works Cited:
"Porkins, Red-6, the Man..." 12 May 2008 <http://www.geocities.com/athens/acropolis/6774/>.
In conclusion... Jek Porkins is my hero.
Thank you. |
05-11-2008, 11:56 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Clarkston, MI | | | I approve of this thread.
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05-12-2008, 12:06 AM
|  | I'm a tumbler, born under punches | | Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Northern California | | Quote:
Originally Posted by KeithBMI he even refused to wear his chin strap... Could he be much more of a badass? I think not. | Chin straps are for people with chins. . .
Also, he looks like my ex-landlord, who I wouldn't have minded seeing explode in a ball of flame. |
05-12-2008, 12:06 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Metro Detroit, Michigan | | Quote:
Originally Posted by username n/a I approve of this thread. | Thank you, sir. |
05-12-2008, 12:07 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Metro Detroit, Michigan | | Quote:
Originally Posted by TheBigO Chin straps are for people with chins. . . | I don't see your point... Jek Porkins had at least 3 chins. |
05-12-2008, 12:15 AM
| | I'm a tumbler, born under punches | | Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Northern California | | Quote:
Originally Posted by KeithBMI I don't see your point... Jek Porkins had at least 3 chins. | I disagree. Much like a circle could be said to have infinite sides as much as it could be said to have no sides at all, so it is with Porkins and his chins. Once you pass double chin, you reach a level of amorphous neck fat and chinlessness. But damn if that fat bastard couldn't fly an X-Wing with the best of 'em. |
05-12-2008, 12:26 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Burlington, NJ | | Quote:
Originally Posted by username n/a I approve of this thread. | I approve of your approval. |
05-12-2008, 12:52 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Lakeland, FL | | A rather porcine fellow indeed. A true hero. May he RIP  |
05-12-2008, 05:38 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: On The Bayou | | | Darth brought him back to life with some fancy Dark Side hocus pocus...then he roasted him alive with an apple in his mouth & fed him to Jabba. |
05-12-2008, 05:42 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Atlanta | | Quote:
Originally Posted by peterbright Darth brought him back to life with some fancy Dark Side hocus pocus...then he roasted him alive with an apple in his mouth & fed him to Jabba. |
hey if you are gonna go out, go out with a bang!
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05-12-2008, 05:48 AM
|  | Drunk on power... and beer | | Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Co. Kerry, Ireland. | | Meh, Biggs & Wedge rocked much harder.  
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05-12-2008, 07:17 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Metro Detroit, Michigan | | Quote:
Originally Posted by TheBigO I disagree. Much like a circle could be said to have infinite sides as much as it could be said to have no sides at all, so it is with Porkins and his chins. Once you pass double chin, you reach a level of amorphous neck fat and chinlessness. But damn if that fat bastard couldn't fly an X-Wing with the best of 'em. | Interesting point.  |
05-12-2008, 07:22 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Suffolk County,NY | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Darkstrike Meh, Biggs & Wedge rocked much harder. | I liked Wedge's later life, where he retired to a fishing village in northern Scotland to run a bed and breakfast with his hot wife.......ah selkies! |
05-12-2008, 07:23 AM
|  | You don't want to do that. Trust me. Forum Administrator | | Join Date: Mar 2000 Location: atlanta ga | | Quote:
Originally Posted by TheBigO I disagree. Much like a circle could be said to have infinite sides as much as it could be said to have no sides at all, so it is with Porkins and his chins. Once you pass double chin, you reach a level of amorphous neck fat and chinlessness. | so in other words, he was george lucas's real double in the movie.
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05-12-2008, 07:26 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Metro Detroit, Michigan | | | Did Biggs die during the assault on the Death Star?
...Because I swear I've seen that face while viewing intergalactic pornography. |
05-12-2008, 07:32 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Lakeland, FL | | Quote:
Originally Posted by KeithBMI Did Biggs die during the assault on the Death Star?
...Because I swear I've seen that face while viewing intergalactic pornography. | I thought he died later in life............on an away mission with Kirk and Spock  |
05-12-2008, 07:53 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: PR of Greenbelt, MD | | Well, that explains a lot about this guy.... 
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Originally Posted by plangentmusic I hope you have an ugly wife, otherwise you may have to die. | |
05-12-2008, 08:25 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: On The Bayou | | | They really hit the bottom of the barrel with all those pilots. |
05-12-2008, 09:04 AM
|  | The Lowdown Diggler | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Huntington Beach, CA | | Quote:
Originally Posted by peterbright They really hit the bottom of the barrel with all those pilots. | They just went to the local arcade and told all the nerds they could be real star fighters. |
05-12-2008, 09:08 AM
| | Drunk on power... and beer | | Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Co. Kerry, Ireland. | | Quote:
Originally Posted by MakiSupaStar They just went to the local arcade and told all the nerds they could be real star fighters. | Musta spent all of their money on FX.
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