Joining the Army, taking my life back - Page 2

will33 · #21 11-13-2012, 07:37 PM

BTW, in those days, I still played in a regularly gigging cover band with other Army, Air Force and civilian employees playing every enlisted club and a few german clubs within a couple hours drive every weekend we wanted to and some we didn't. Got 2 paychecks a month...one in deutchmarks from the booking agent, and one in dollars from the Army. Blew it all, had the time of my life and came home penniless. Looking back...I wouldn't have done it any other way...very few get a chance to experience that life.

You don't have to put your music down for the military...just take a break from it while in training.

You are also going to live and work with a cross-section of people from all walks of life. You'll meet friends you never knew you had, and will get a chance to experience people and things not many do. You'll get a real appreciation of what "an American" is.

Anyway...best of luck to you sir......and write your sister often. Don't forsake your mom. After all, she's your Mom., but live your life, not hers. Hopefully she'll come around eventualy.

P. Aaron · #22 11-13-2012, 08:10 PM

God Bless man!

jp58 · #23 11-13-2012, 08:19 PM

Best of luck to ya! Plenty of my friends are currently in and most are absolutely happy they made the decision.

electracoyote · #24 11-13-2012, 08:21 PM

We have one of the best, if not THE best, military in the world. You will be well cared for. You will mature and grow, mentally and physically. You will have everything you need provided for you and get a paycheck at the end of the month. The food is good, even in basic training, and it gets damn good in advanced training and wherever you end up stationed, unless you get shipped overseas, then everything might change. If you opt for a discharge upon completing your initial enlistment requirement, you will qualify for educational and financial perks. If you make it a career, you will have a guaranteed and comfortable pension when you retire. If you are sent to an active war zone and put in harm's way, that is a game changer, but otherwise, it's a great career choice.

In my humble opinion.

**RaginRog** · #25 11-13-2012, 08:34 PM

Alec, I wish you the absolute best. I was in the Army active duty from 90-92 (Reserves from 97-2000 also) and admittedly joined because I needed the college money. But also because my parents told me they couldn't afford to send me any longer. Things were a little tough, because my father and I didn't get along very well, but not on the level that you and your mother unfortunately fight. I have to say that it was tough, but it was a great experience for me, and eventually paid off when I was able to use my vets preference to land a government job. You'll be facing the possibility of being deployed, but you seem like you're a very determined and strong willed young man. You will be a benefit to the Army and the soldiers you will be serving with.

Best regards,
Roger

MEKer · #26 11-13-2012, 08:59 PM

You are doing the right thing. You seem to have the right attitude about it. You are planning to move ahead into something that will benefit you greatly.

Now be wise and really choose the right MOS (i.e. job) so it can pay big for you once you are out--whether quickly or after a career. Do NOT be pressured into an MOS by the recruiter (HE may be having pressure to fill up some slots). You hang in there to get the MOS you want. Period. And no, don't fall for the old, "No sweat, just come on in at THIS MOS and you can change it to another a little later." BIG LIE------you'll be able to request a different MOS at the end of your enlistment term...when they want you to re-enlist.

You said a 5 yr hitch-------I'd advise the whole 6 yr hitch and get ALL the bonuses available. And if you ASVAB high enough, look at the officer program or the Warrant Officer program. Then you are REALLY cookin' ! Gotta love the Warrant Officer grades---all the bennies of an officer and nothing near the competitive grind to get promoted.

I better shut up or I'll write a 10K word essay about this. I did a total of 27 yrs and still miss it.

Go for it.

oleskool · #27 11-13-2012, 09:51 PM

Wow... First, let me say this, you need to try to talk to a professional. Not that there is anything wrong with you but, although there are some really cool people here this is a bass guitar forum.

Second, the thing I noticed was that your mother may have spent some time in a war zone. That is no easy task!!!?? Your mother may be experiencing some post traumatic stress. Have you ever tried to get her to talk to a professional!!!!!?? The thing is, being placed in a position where compassion can cost you, and your team, your lives is....well, psychologically taxing at the least. The things you are saying (ie.. drinking, angry, fits of rage, just doesn't care, cheating) all point to stress disorder.

Last, try to make the time you spend with your father therapeutic. You will need a clear head to complete boot camp.

P.s. tell your parents, both of them..... we here at talkbass said Thanks for their Service.
P.s.s. Good luck

machine gewehr · #28 11-14-2012, 03:48 AM

Best of luck to you Alec. I'll be joining the Turkish army for mandatory service in April 2013.

mkandolf · #29 11-14-2012, 10:36 AM

Alec, sounds like you have a plan, and a good one. I'll repeat what one other poster asked, what is your MOS?

Never in the Armed Forces myself, but my dad was in them (Navy, then Army National Guard) and my three sons all have served or are serving in the U.S. Army. You get out of it what you put into it. Oldest of my sons got booted out and isn't working in his field he was trained in but did use the college funds to become a mechanic. Second son is now an NCO and the standards officer for his UAV unit. Youngest son is only starting his second year currently in Germany and is already bucking for the Warrant Officer program.

Sorry to hear how your mom is. Hopefully she'll see she needs serious help. You've done what you can. Make sure you keep contact with your sister.

warnergt · #30 11-14-2012, 08:54 PM

Alec, good luck to you. It sounds like you've decided to take
your future into your own hands -- which is always a good thing.

My only concern is that you may be abandoning your current
pursuit of a college education. It is imperative that you
graduate. Are you jumping ship before you get your degree?
What's going on here? You don't want to mess this up if you
can avoid it -- especially since you have been at it for a while.

If you haven't completed your degree, come up with a plan to
complete it now. Perhaps you can join ROTC and get the
military to pay for it, if necessary.

tplyons · #31 11-14-2012, 09:27 PM

Best of luck. It sounds like you know what you need and you're not afraid to get it.

I come from a similar military family... Dad was a 20 year vet and Mom did 9 years until my brother was born. So I know the feeling. Glad Military will work for you!

Munjibunga · #32 11-14-2012, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alecduncan

Obviously this was a pretty tough and emotional period of my life but I like to think I handled it better than most ...

You have. While my situation wasn't quite as extreme as yours, I made the same decision 45 years ago - I joined the Marines to get away from my mother and to get the GI Bill for my return to college. The structure and discipline in the Army will help you focus your objectives and make moving forward easier once you get out. You clearly have your head screwed on straight, and you should do well in the Army. You might want to consider a 4-year term, unless you're planning on OCS, which may require a longer commitment.

A cautionary note: you are joining the military during times of armed conflict. Be sure you are ready to live up to the responsibilty of your commitment, up to and including the taking of human life, and possibly forfeiting your own. It is a very serious decision, and the consequences of breaching your commitment are rather severe and long-term. Viet Nam was going hot and heavy when I joined, and I always assumed that I would be going there - but hey, at 20, you're immortal. I didn't have to go and ended up getting a cush job in my hometown for the 3 years I was in. But you can't plan on dumb luck, for which there is no substitute.

Hang in there. Anyone can have a good time at Disneyland, but tough times define who you are by the way you deal with them. Things can only get better from here.

alecduncan · #33 11-15-2012, 07:49 AM

Thanks again for all the support, guys. I really appreciate all the tips and I'll definitely keep what you all say in mind.

Regarding my college, I will more than likely be able to convert a lot of my AIT/DLI training to college credit, and I plan on receiving my bachelor's degree concurrent to my Army career if I can help it.

I plan on keeping in contact with my sister, and even though I can't help but feel protective, I know she'll turn out alright. She's well on her way despite the lack of support coming from my mother.

In other news, I'm really hoping that I'm able to land an European first duty station and be able to explore out there! I'm an army brat and I'm used to traveling, but it's a whole different animal when you're on your own.

mkandolf · #34 11-15-2012, 10:26 AM

One of my sons currently in the Army is serving in Vilseck, Germany right now (other currently in is in Colorado) and he is having a blast over there. Uses the public transportation to check out all the sights and have a great time on his time off. His only problem is finding someone that wants to hit the same places he wants to explore.

Texan · #35 11-15-2012, 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Munjibunga

You have. While my situation wasn't quite as extreme as yours, I made the same decision 45 years ago - I joined the Marines to get away from my mother and to get the GI Bill for my return to college. The structure and discipline in the Army will help you focus your objectives and make moving forward easier once you get out. You clearly have your head screwed on straight, and you should do well in the Army. You might want to consider a 4-year term, unless you're planning on OCS, which may require a longer commitment.

A cautionary note: you are joining the military during times of armed conflict. Be sure you are ready to live up to the responsibilty of your commitment, up to and including the taking of human life, and possibly forfeiting your own. It is a very serious decision, and the consequences of breaching your commitment are rather severe and long-term. Viet Nam was going hot and heavy when I joined, and I always assumed that I would be going there - but hey, at 20, you're immortal. I didn't have to go and ended up getting a cush job in my hometown for the 3 years I was in. But you can't plan on dumb luck, for which there is no substitute.

Hang in there. Anyone can have a good time at Disneyland, but tough times define who you are by the way you deal with them. Things can only get better from here.

^^^^^This...Good Luck.

Chef FourString · #36 11-15-2012, 11:28 AM

Good luck, man.

jamestown94west · #37 12-02-2012, 07:51 PM

I will be going off to basic around the same time. We may run into each other.

I'm going into the Army National Guard. I'll be playing bass in the 135th Army rock band, and jazz band.

My MOS is the band, so that's all I'll be doing once I get back from basic. It sounds to me like you would really enjoy playing in the band, and I can't recommend it enough.

I'm even going in as an E4, because I already have experience and skill.

Do you know where their sending you for basic?

It is possible to serve your country, and still play music quite a bit!

**Pacman** · #38 12-03-2012, 08:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jamestown94west

My MOS is the band, so that's all I'll be doing once I get back from basic. It sounds to me like you would really enjoy playing in the band, and I can't recommend it enough.

If you think music is ALL you're going to be doing, you're in for a surprise.

jamestown94west · #39 12-03-2012, 08:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pacman

If you think music is ALL you're going to be doing, you're in for a surprise.

I know better than to believe that I will only ever show up for drill and play bass the whole time.

But, that's what I'm going in for, and that's my main reason for being there.

scottz0369 · #40 12-03-2012, 10:18 AM

Alec, I had kind of similiar situation when I was 19 -- nowhere job, no prospects for the future. My family was supportive, but I saw that my future wasn't going to be what I hoped for. So I went down to the recruiting office to join the Navy -- my grandfather served in WWII on a destroyer and always talked positively of his service. The Navy recruiter rubbed me wrong though, so long story short, I dropped out of community college and joined the Marines for what I originally intended to be a 4-year tour. I wanted to get my head on straight, do something I couldn't do anywhere else (I joined the Infantry), and generally get away from my situation that didn't feel had opportunity for the future I wanted, however vague those ideas were. That was in '87. I retired in '08. I stayed in for various reasons. One was that I still didn't see any real prospects on the civilian side. Another was that I didn't get any college done during my first tour like I wanted to (I spent much of my first four years in Okinawa deploying all over the pacific, and generally having a good time), and most importantly, I enjoyed what I did and the people I was with. That's not to say that there weren't days that life sucked -- poor leadership (which is found everywhere), and the life of an infantryman often involves being dirty, cold, wet and tired; but I still enjoyed it immensely on balance. So I re-enlisted with the intent to finish up a bachelors degree and move on. I found that I enjoyed my second enlistment as much as my first. I was able to finish a bachelors degree (online) using my benefits, and met my wife. Of course I deployed, and did the things associated with the Marine infantry. I found myself in positions of leadership (somewhere I never expected to be), and was greatly rewarded in those positions, mainly through mentoring younger Marines, and seeing them become successful in the military, and later in civilian life. After a couple of tours in Iraq, I decided it was time to retire (I did 21 years and change) to be with my kids before they were still in the house. The combination of my education and experience landed my a job with the Army here in Wisconsin. I did a tour as a drug/alcohol counselor while on active duty (the Marines used to take senior NCO's and train them as counselors-I did that for 3 years)--I do something similar with the Army now, but in a supervisory position. I'm also working on an MBA with my post 9/11 GI Bill - I retired before we were able to transfer it to family members, so it's use or lose for me.
The biggest thing I got from military service was options. Once I was ready to move on, I was able to pick and choose where I went next and what I wanted to do. I learned leadership and generally developed things in me that I didn't know I had. Also, being retired from active-duty gives me a monthly check. It's not much, but it pays the mortgage, and gives me options on what employment to take - I can walk from this job anytime and still have something coming in. I've also got a variety of skills that I can use to gain employment -- infantry skills can translate to security contracting (I got offered jobs from a couple of security/training contractors overseas), drug/alcohol, and sales from my tour as a recruiter. But it's more than that-I gained so much experience in life and had the opportunity to see and do things I would have never seen otherwise: I did reconaissance and interdiction in the SW United States, patrolled the jungle in the Phillipines against guys out to do us harm, cleared houses in desert villages in Iraq, coordinated food/medical in refugee camps in Indonesia and Iraq, and yes, went face to face with people who had my death as their primary goal, but honestly, I did far more humanitarian than combat missions in my career. I also made friends that are closer to me than my family, drank beer in over 25 countries, and looked damn good in uniform. I wouldn't trade the experience for anything.
As an aside, since 2003, everyone joining the military, especially the Army and Marines (not to discount what the Air Force and Navy do) know what's in store for them. I've never seen a group so willing to serve despite the known risk. When I joined, the Cold War was on, and I joined to fight the Russians (imagine my surprise when we went to Kuwait instead of the Fulda Gap), but there wasn't any shooting going on. I don't know if I would have been so willing to raise my hand if the situation was as it is now. For that reason, and people like you, I have enormous respect for anyone willing to serve today.
You're joining an elite club-a tiny percentage of the population currently serves, and it's a brotherhood that will remain long after you've hung up the uniform.

The only advice I would give is whatever your MOS, and whatever job you happen to be doing, do it to the best of your ability, and never turn down an opportunity to gain a new experience.