My roommate just asked how to use my Brita pitcher...

SpankyPants · #1 09-15-2008, 10:11 PM

"Umm, you put water in the top."

GeneralElectric · #2 09-15-2008, 10:14 PM

Don't you need to put a live newt in the filtration system?

Against Will · #3 09-15-2008, 10:16 PM

Have you already performed the Hecate purification ritual to expel any evil filtration spirits? Better double check, those buggers are tiny and make your water taste like pee.

SpankyPants · #4 09-15-2008, 10:23 PM

Will, where is your sig from? It cracks me up everytime.

MakiSupaStar · #5 09-15-2008, 10:23 PM

In order to properly calibrate your Brita water filter you first have run the water across the body of a nude sexy Asian chick. When certain features on the sexy Asian chick's body are standing to full attention then you know your jug is fully calibrated.

SpankyPants · #6 09-15-2008, 10:25 PM

Oh man! I want THAT filter!

The problem with all of the hot Asian chicks here is that most don't speak any English. Spanky's love knows no language, but they don't know that.

Kevbroce · #7 09-15-2008, 11:47 PM

Reminds me of the time one of my roommates vacuumed my back patio with my brand new Hoover... I've never seen concrete that clean!

Jared Lash · #8 09-15-2008, 11:55 PM

I had to show a guy in my fraternity how to use a standard mop and bucket . . . twice.

ADbassman · #9 09-16-2008, 12:08 AM

I ran into some people today that didn't know Kansas was a state.

Sifl · #10 09-16-2008, 12:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ADbassman

I ran into some people today that didn't know Kansas was a state.

I've met people who thought Montana was part of Canada.

selfblessed · #11 09-16-2008, 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheBigO

I had to show a guy in my fraternity how to use a standard mop and bucket . . . twice.

What is wrong with people? How? AAAAHHH never mind. Mr. O you have far more patience than I do sir.

Armueller2001 · #12 09-16-2008, 02:05 AM

I live with a ****** for a roommate too. This kid is a complete buffoon. Here's some things off the top of my head -

1) He wants to keep the air conditioning on at 73 degrees all night, when it's 65 outside. Doesn't understand that it will cool his room off quicker opening a window and putting a fan in it. He also takes at least 3 - 20 minute showers per day. Must not understand the concept of energy use = money.

2) "Do you know where the lint trap on the dryer is?"

3) He got a new computer and wanted to connect to the network, so I asked him if he plugged it into the router. He said "I can't do that, I don't have a WIRELESS card"... I didn't know you needed a wireless card to use a wire!!

And yes, his computer DID have an ethernet card.

4) I almost forgot this one.. we're at Best Buy with his new computer and I said "Sweet, it has a DVD burner." His reply - "Does that mean I can't burn CD's?"

lemur821 · #13 09-16-2008, 02:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MakiSupaStar

When certain features on the sexy Asian chick's body are standing to full attention then you know your jug is fully calibrated.

Oh, one of those chicks. I don't suppose I want to know which features you mean.

Bob Lee (QSC) · #14 09-16-2008, 10:00 AM

Try doing tech support.

I encounter people who buy audio gear and don't know what "input" and "output" mean.

EricF · #15 09-16-2008, 10:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bob Lee (QSC)

Try doing tech support.

I encounter people who buy audio gear and don't know what "input" and "output" mean.

I played with a gee-tard who had that same issue.

Thunderscreech · #16 09-16-2008, 10:08 AM

My roommate once asked why his internet was so slow. I told him ne needed a shorter cord. "The longer the cord," I told him "the longer the internet takes to get to from the wall to your computer."

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sifl

I've met people who thought Montana was part of Canada.

I was thought that dental floss was grown in montana, and that people rode around with ZICON-ENCRUSTED tweezers on a moonlighty night.

MakiSupaStar · #17 09-16-2008, 10:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpankyPants

Oh man! I want THAT filter!

The problem with all of the hot Asian chicks here is that most don't speak any English.

I fail to see why that is a problem.

EDIT: For proper calibration, read the instructions written in Mandarin, Korean, and Japanese. Simply match the sexy asian chick with the correlated language.

Against Will · #18 09-16-2008, 09:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpankyPants

Will, where is your sig from? It cracks me up everytime.

Its from the opening track on Patton Oswalt's latest comedy album, Werewolves and Lollipops

You can see a clip of the bit here.

richnota · #19 09-16-2008, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sifl

I've met people who thought Montana was part of Canada.

I dont get it.

SelenaBassGirl · #20 09-16-2008, 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Armueller2001

I live with a ****** for a roommate too. This kid is a complete buffoon. Here's some things off the top of my head -

1) He wants to keep the air conditioning on at 73 degrees all night, when it's 65 outside. Doesn't understand that it will cool his room off quicker opening a window and putting a fan in it. He also takes at least 3 - 20 minute showers per day. Must not understand the concept of energy use = money.

2) "Do you know where the lint trap on the dryer is?"

3) He got a new computer and wanted to connect to the network, so I asked him if he plugged it into the router. He said "I can't do that, I don't have a WIRELESS card"... I didn't know you needed a wireless card to use a wire!!

And yes, his computer DID have an ethernet card.

4) I almost forgot this one.. we're at Best Buy with his new computer and I said "Sweet, it has a DVD burner." His reply - "Does that mean I can't burn CD's?"

your roommate sounds like he has a lot of blond moments!