Opinions on GF going out on dates with male "friends"

[eedre]

So a huge cloud came over my head today when I found out this girl I've been seeing made plans to go to the baseball game tonight with a guy "friend".

As I thought about what this meant, I thought "I know! I'll ask everyone at TB!"

So here I am. And here's my analysis of the situation (crazy? what's new.):

It's not peachy for a girl to go out on a 1-on-1 excursion with a single guy friend while you're with someone else without telling him first. It just looks suspicious no matter how much you claim he's just a friend. Guys, we know we only hang out with female friends alone for a reason. I have female friends, but I don't ask them out to lunch or to a movie? I hang out with them in group situations.

She says should would have asked me but knew I didn't like baseball. So then it's okay to seek male attention elsewhere? Isn't that the same situation as bringing in a musician to "sit in" on a few songs?

If my understanding of this clearly laid out ordeal is skew, please. help.

Maybe I'm just an extremely jealous person. But the fact that she was trying to hide that she was going with another guy just irritates the hell out of me.

[Asa Samuel]

Book a seat right behind them, bring along a hammer and a bunch of flowers jsut incase.


On a more serious note you could tell her that you'd rather go with her than someone else go with her, try telling her that you feel a bit jealous about it.

Or seek some advice from maki.

[i_got_a_mohawk]

I wouldnt be keen on that either.

But i dare say it would depend on the male friend. If it was someone who you know is just a friend or someone who you have never heard of before

[eedre]

Originally Posted by i_got_a_mohawk

I wouldnt be keen on that either.

But i dare say it would depend on the male friend. If it was someone who you know is just a friend or someone who you have never heard of before

Don't know the guy...

[Atoz]

If the "friend" is someone she's never mentioned in conversation before, I would be suspicious.

[Marcus]

Originally Posted by eedre

She says should would have asked me but knew I didn't like baseball. So then it's okay to seek male attention elsewhere?

If my understanding of this clearly laid out ordeal is skew, please. help.

Maybe I'm just an extremely jealous person. But the fact that she was trying to hide the fact that she was going with another guy just irritates the hell out of me.

The stuff in bold is the biggest problem your relationship has. The fact that she is seeking attention from another guy because you're not "keeping her happy" (infer what you may) is a tell-tale sign that she might be ready to end your relationship. The fact that she obfuscated the fact as well is another big indication of the aforementioned.

As far as the other guy is concerned... he's after tail, plain and simple. Does not matter if at the surface he claims its for friendship, the fact is, if a guy is taking out another guy's girlfriend on what essentially is a date, he wants something out of it.

What I say to that is, don't get mad. Just go out 1 on 1 with other girls. Don't play the victim.

[Risen Ashes]

Solution:

1-sign up to this newsletter http://www.doubleyourdating.com/

2-Tonight/This afternoon go to the mall and approach 20-30 women. If you get rejected forget about it, keep on and move on the next one. No mall, ok go to a CVS, Walgreens, a bookstore, you need food go to the supermarket. GO SOMEWHERE WHERE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND KNOW WOMEN GO TO. So yes a bookstore, supermarket, not a video game store or anything like that.

You will see that by talking and "flirting" or just talking to other women you will stop worrying about it.

I recommend you go with a friend a guy friend specifically.

NEED AN OPENER? Here's your opener buddy: You go up to the girl or group of girls and ask them the opinion on your exact situation EXCEPT you take yourself out and say that your friend is in the situation and what they think about it from a female perspective. Eventually aim to get into a 5 minute convo, when and if they say something that you can use to make fun of them-BUST THEIR BALLS, mainly you want to make them laugh but show that you are not intimidated. Yes approach the most attractive women possible. If that's a problem fly down here to Miami and I'll tell you where the most beautiful women in the world are hanging out.

Point is, you need to step outside of your situation and RE-FRAME. Get off talk bass, and away from your computer. change and go now, the earlier the better, don't wait for it to get dark, if you can meet women during the day they are not expecting it and they will like this.

Follow my advice and you will stop worrying about her, get the female perspective and probably get a few phone numbers.

[eedre]

Originally Posted by Risen Ashes

Solution:

1-sign up to this newsletter http://www.doubleyourdating.com/

2-Tonight/This afternoon go to the mall and approach 20-30 women. If you get rejected forget about it, keep on and move on the next one. No mall, ok go to a CVS, Walgreens, a bookstore, you need food go to the supermarket. GO SOMEWHERE WHERE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND KNOW WOMEN GO TO. So yes a bookstore, supermarket, not a video game store or anything like that.

You will see that by talking and "flirting" or just talking to other women you will stop worrying about it.

I recommend you go with a friend a guy friend specifically.

NEED AN OPENER? Here's your opener buddy: You go up to the girl or group of girls and ask them the opinion on your exat situation EXCEPT you take yourself out and say that your friend is in the situation and what they think about it from a female perspective. Eventually aim to get into a 5 minute convo, when and if they say something that you can use to make fun of them-BUST THEIR BALLS, mainly you want to make them laugh but show that you are not intimidated. Yes approach the most attreactive women possible. If that's a problem fly down here to Miami and I'll tell you where the most beautiful women in the world are hanging out.

Point is, you need to step outsided of your situation and RE-FRAME. Get off talk bass, and away from your computer. change and go now, the early the better, don't wait for it to get dark, if you can meet women during the day they are not expecting it and they will like this.

Follow my advice and you will stop worrying about her, get the female perspective and probably get a few phone numbers.

That would be fine - but I'm not a player, and I don't want to be... the world has enough of them.

[Risen Ashes]

Don't debate it I know what i'm talking about. Oh and yes what your "female friend" is playing you for a fool. I'm not going to sugarcoat it, but she's wasting you time and you have 20-30 ladies to meet NOW. GO GO GO.

[Risen Ashes]

It's not a player strategy. It's just an Alpha thing.

Go to the website and read and maybe you'll learn something. Anyway, I tried. Good luck.

[knarleybass]

Sounds like she is still looking.

[HEIST]

Aw c'mon. She's just going to a baseball game with a friend who happens to be male. I don't think there's anything else to read into. Either that or I am super naive.

You mean the guy I am having coffee with alone tomorrow is not just wanting coffee!?!?!?

[Risen Ashes]

Just saw you put "GF" in the post... I was not clear on that

If she is indeed your girlfriend and you are in an "official" relationship with her then ok. Smash the guy up. If it's not "official" well then I go back to what i said before

[EricF]

She was probably trying to hide it becuase she knew you'd get worked up about it, and scamper off to the computer to tell all your "friends" on TB.

Do you have an exclusive relationship? If so, has she given you any other reason to think she might be gettin' busy with someone else? Depending on how she's wired, getting paranoid and jealous might hurt your the situation. Then again, maybe she's trying to get your attention.

[lunarpollen]

I'm male, 95% of my friends are female, and many of them are seeing someone or are married. We hang out sometimes, watch videos, meet up for food, go see bands play, etc. There's absolutely nothing I want from them other than friendship and decent company.

[eedre]

Originally Posted by Risen Ashes

Just saw you put "GF" in the post... I was not clear on that

If she is indeed your girlfriend and you are in an "official" relationship with her then ok. Smash the guy up. If it's not "official" well then I go back to what i said before

Well it's weird (when isn't it). I've known her for two years. Started hanging out more for the past month and a half. But after knowing her this long (not in the Biblical sense), we're well past the getting to know each other phase.

Crazy, right.

[HEIST]

Originally Posted by lunarpollen

I'm male, 95% of my friends are female, and many of them are seeing someone or are married. We hang out sometimes, watch videos, meet up for food, go see bands play, etc. There's absolutely nothing I want from them other than friendship and decent company.

Exactly what I mean. I was wondering if it was possible for a person to just do one thing with no other intentions. I say yes because I'm that way.

She doesn't have to be looking for someone else, this isn't a red flag on your relationship, nor is she hoping to get more of your attention. She's simply watching a baseball game with a friend.

I'd be jealous still but that's because I'm a jealous person.

[MAJOR METAL]

John has this caused you to smoke up a storm ?

[eedre]

Originally Posted by MAJOR METAL

John has this caused you to smoke up a storm ?

Not yet... and my smokes are 10 miles away...

[gold_member_321]

No No No.