So.....I'm an alcoholic...for reals.

[Stanley Design]

Yeah so I guess I'm a straight up alcoholic and can't do what it takes by myself, but I know a 12 step wont work for me. Does anyone know of any groups that work just putting you into a positive peer group and supporting each other? Also, it might be harder because I'm in Montreal and can't speak french.

Over the past three years, the teeth/woman lost, the blood spilled and thousands of dollars in debt to the bottle. Assault with a weapon.

It wouldn't be too bad if I were just a drunk and puked and passed out, but I don't stop, I go to the brink of dieing and keep going and get rowdy and fight and make terrible decisions. I spend more at the liquor store than I do on bills. The worst part is, I loved it for so long, all of it. I don't drink to solve problems, I drink to create them and have fun.

It's not like I feel the NEED to drink, I can go months without a beer. And several nights a week we'll just have a few while watching the game, but there are nights where I sit and drink 1.5L of whiskey and still want more.

Any advice from you guys?

[Mike Money]

lots and lots of water...




and avoid your usual company

[mrokern]

Churches often have support groups. If you're not adverse to religion, you might want to start there.

Best of luck,

-Mark

[fenderhutz]

Seek professional help.

[Stanley Design]

Professional help where? Churches pretty much only offer 12 step.

[mike phillips]

please get some help. try a nursin and rehab center. good luck to you my friend. you can overcome this.

[jonathan_matos5]

Originally Posted by Todd Stanley

Professional help where? Churches pretty much only offer 12 step.

AA

Celebrate Recovery

http://www.canadadrugrehab.ca/Quebec...s-Meeting.html

[Stumbo]

Originally Posted by Todd Stanley

It's not like I feel the NEED to drink, I can go months without a beer.

1. If you can go for months w/o drinking, why not make it years. Don't hang out where the main activity is drinking.

2. Since you drink for the "excitement", I suggest you find a positive substitute activity.

3. IME, drinking alcohol is self-medication for depression and similar types of conditions.

Since you can't out-think yourself, I suggest that you seek out a professional who may be able to help you get to the bottom of why you drink, especially since you can go for months w/o drinking.

And, when you do drink, it causes so many problems for you and you at the same time you state "I loved it for so long". Why is it that you love causing problems for yourself?

Good luck.

[Visirale]

Don't join a church group. They are ridiculous and move the locus of control from you to God, and it makes you a totally helpless victim. Take some responsibility and just stop. Peer support groups are great, but find out what you are getting into before you join. The south park episode about AA is actually really good and legitimate.

[bobba66]

I'm an alcoholic, too. AA does a lot of good for many people. You have to keep going back and look for the positive in it. 90 meetings in 90 days is a pretty good recipe for success. No one does all the steps perfectly, or even close. They are just a guide to sobriety. Good Luck with what ever you choose.

[ryco]

Originally Posted by Todd Stanley

Yeah so I guess I'm a straight up alcoholic and can't do what it takes by myself, but I know a 12 step wont work for me. Does anyone know of any groups that work just putting you into a positive peer group and supporting each other?

A 12 step AA group IS a positive peer group that will support you because they all been dere.

I'm not in AA but have supported many band members, friends and even my junkie brother (now clean & sober for 15+ years after 20+ years of heroin & alcohol abuse) who have come so close to death in front of my eyes.

At least give it a fair shot. I know of no other group so effective. Most of these friends went through intensive month long rehab programs and the main follow up of these programs have been 90 days of AA as a follow up. The friends who chose not to do the 90 meetings in 90 days have gone back to drinking and drugging and death in two cases. Breaks my heart.

Being a supporter of these ppl getting sober means I've had to do month long stints in Al-Anon groups.

Do yourself a favor and at least check it out please.

From Stanley Clarke: "Life is just a game and there's many ways to play, and all you do is choose"

with love, -Ryan Collins

[Trevorus]

Originally Posted by Visirale

Don't join a church group. They are ridiculous and move the locus of control from you to God, and it makes you a totally helpless victim. Take some responsibility and just stop. Peer support groups are great, but find out what you are getting into before you join. The south park episode about AA is actually really good and legitimate.

That sounds like quite a bitter stance, and I totally disagree. I believe in God, but the individual is solely responsible his own actions.

That said, find a group that works for you. Don't be afraid to try more than one thing. Like was said earlier, if you can go for long periods without drinking, just keep not drinking. The other thing you can try is when you get an urge to drink, find something else to do like exercise. Go the complete opposite way with it and do something healthy for yourself. Also, as was said, a professional may be the best to help you identify the cause of your internal desire to drink like that.

[JNowiski]

Originally Posted by Stumbo

1. If you can go for months w/o drinking, why not make it years. Don't hang out where the main activity is drinking.

2. Since you drink for the "excitement", I suggest you find a positive substitute activity.

3. IME, drinking alcohol is self-medication for depression and similar types of conditions.

Since you can't out-think yourself, I suggest that you seek out a professional who may be able to help you get to the bottom of why you drink, especially since you can go for months w/o drinking.

true that. i won't lie, when i was back in the states i was drinking as self-medication. i hate my job and am completely miserable. i can't get out of this job until 2010, so that just adds more stress. not to mention i hate my boss who has basically never liked me and always treated me like s**t pretty much. he wonders why i act like a POS most the time but doesn't realize when you treat someone like an idiot POS all the time that's basically what they'll become. i have no motivation to better myself right now because after a year or two of trying to look at the bright side of things i'm just burntout. now put a person like this in iraq without alcohol and you're looking at a completely misearble and unmotivated person. that's basically my story in a nutshell right now. i did however cut back on the drinking some before i came over here in hopes it'd help me out a little.

btw, support groups don't do much unless you actually want to quit...for realsies.

[bongomania]

Originally Posted by Visirale

Take some responsibility and just stop.

You know nothing about addiction.

Stumbo had some good advice there. Take up skydiving, or street luge in traffic, or boxing- something that will give you the feeling of living on the edge but that doesn't involve drinking.

Also FWIW one of my best friends battled several different addictions for years, and he tried the 12-step groups and he tried going cold turkey on his own, and those efforts just didn't cut it. He ended up checking himself into a hospital for serious professional treatment, and he came out a week or so later a much stronger, clearer, less self-destructive person. He said it was like he had had bad eyesight his whole life, and was finally given a good pair of glasses.

There's no shame in seeking serious medical help for a serious medical issue.

[jonathan_matos5]

Originally Posted by Visirale

Don't join a church group. They are ridiculous and move the locus of control from you to God, and it makes you a totally helpless victim. Take some responsibility and just stop. Peer support groups are great, but find out what you are getting into before you join. The south park episode about AA is actually really good and legitimate.

don't go bashing church ran groups. each person is in control of their own actions God/Satan didn't make you do anything. if you decide to seek religion as a means to quit then so be it. but the main goal of a church ran group to get people to quit abusing a substance is just to help people quit.

[Thor]

AA is not specifically church affiliated. Many churches are
kind enough to host groups that meet there. The groups
function on little or no money and just the goodwill of the
community to allow people that have similar problems to meet,
discuss their problems anonymously and support each
other.

Believe me when I tell you that I have had friends that
would be dead without AA or a similar peer group, and I have
friends, one Eric P. as an example, who literally drank himself
to death. Speaking at his funeral was one of the saddest
days of my life.

You took a step, you acknowledged that you are powerless to
overcome this on your own. AA isn't about god,
but recovery. Many people who become sober begin to explore
their own spirituality and AA favors that. Most musicians I know
have a spitiritual side that complements their creative sides. I
think its part of the package whether the spirituality is black or
white, or in most cases, gray.

Anyway, AA is not some weird cult, it is just a group of people
who have acknowledged that drinking alcohol has ruined their
former lives, and work together to overcome it, recover and move on.

Just go to local meeting, hang, drink some coffee.
You don't have to talk. You can come and go as you
want. Nothing will rub off except you may meet some
people who fought some serious demons in their lives and
are still alive to tell
about it.

While you do that, you can explore other options for recovery,
AA is not for everyone.

Where you are at today, you may not be able to be a survivor.

Like the Funk Bros said in SITSOM, 'Benny didn't make it to
the finish line'.

They mentioned Benny in a DVD. You aren't
even getting there bro.

Either you take action or you will die. Those are your 2
choices.

You decide.

I'm pulling for you. I think we all are.

[Stanley Design]

I would like to be able to sit an enjoy some beer with my friends, it's my lifestyle that gets me drinking more than that. And believe me I tried giving up the lifestyle but it just isn't working, I moved 1200km away to a new city and 8 months later I had no friends and nothing to do. I don't meet anyone because I don't go to school, I work 12 hours a day. Can't meet anyone at work. No time or energy to go out after work, just want to relax. The only thing I have is shows on the weekend, at bars, where everyone is drunk.

It's just been recently that I've decided that "alcohol is effecting my life negatively", when all the trouble I've been in before I loved every minute of it. The lifestyle isn't an ideal one, but it was one I was happy with and loved until now.

There isn't much more of an internal desire to drink then the fact that I like to get drunk and rowdy. I like to fight, I like the taste of bourbon. There's no underlayer of reasons for it. I'm happy with it, but the effects of it are wearing me thin.

It's not the alcohol that is effecting my life negatively, it's the fact that I'm not willing to take the risks I tend to take when I drink heavily anymore.


I know I am NOT poweless and I know I can just force myself, but a positive peer group would be great for me to find. Churches and AA aren't for me, let's leave THAT at THAT. I have nothing against Church and would go for other reasons, but this is my responsibility and believing in a higher power and giving everything into it is NOT going to stop my drinking. If it works for others, cool, wont work for me.

[MJ5150]

Originally Posted by Todd Stanley

....a positive peer group would be great for me to find.

Not because you are a wacko, but I suggest you enroll the services of a mental health professional. There are underlying reasons for your drinking and you seem to realize it. Hanging around some "good" people isn't going to make the drinking go away.

Just my unprofessional observation based upon reading your posts in this thread. It's worth what you paid for it.

-Mike

[Baryonyx]

Todd, you've taken a very big step now by admitting you've got a problem and wanting to change. Call your local hospital/GP, they should be able to give you details of all the alternatives available to you.

[wazzel]

Find the best option for you. For my dad it was getting arrested by a state trooper for DWI and bailed out in the middle of the night by wife and 4 young kids. My dad is a rock and just never touched the stuff agin. He was so embarased for us to have picked him up like that.

Best thing is you see that you need to get it taken care of before you got yourself in a really big mess.

Best of luck.