Some trouble with friends...

[superfunk47]

This is a long rant. You've been warned.

So I learned today that my friends think I'm a douche.

I'm friends with a bunch of drama/band type kids (only close with two of them, used to be three), and a few video games/swimming/slightly more raucous guys, but mostly because I've been friends with a few of them for a long time.

Anyway, sitting in one of my more boring classes today with 2 of the latter type of friends (the ones that I've been friends with for awhile), one of them, being the random, colorful character that he is, asks which of the three of us is the biggest douche. We all look at each other, and it kind of awkwardly shifts to me.

They make the case that I'm in terrible shape, but I'm really not. I quit the swim team, which they're big on, and I tend to exaggerate my laziness around them in the spirit of joking...be able to laugh at yourself, all that, but I think that they took it all a bit more seriously than I had intended. I think they also got a bit bruised that I quit the team, but I just didn't have enough time to commit to it, which they didn't seem to understand.

They went on to "reinforce" their case by stating that I have no life, even though I have a steady job, a steady girlfriend, and a steady passion, music. Not to sound condescending, but neither of them have ever had girlfriends or steady jobs.

Now, I know I do some stupid stuff around my guy friends, but I'm certainly not the only one acting that way. I guess it just feels really unfair to be singled out like that by guys I thought were on my side, especially when they act the exact same way.

I kind of just laughed it off, but that one stung. And I know I can't talk to them about it without being labeled as a certain part of the female anatomy. Senior year seems to be plagued with the loss of old friendships. Kind of makes me want to disconnect completely. Shouldn't I be able to expect more from my friends?

[HollowBassman]

You're thinking too much!

I make fun of my friends all the time, and I expect them to do the same.

[Kwesi]

How does what you described make you a douche? I was under the impression that a douche was the girlfriend stealin', last donut eatin', never repayin', crack dealin', mofo that borrowed your PS3 and then moved to the Philippines.

On a serious note what you should do is a total self evaluation. What can you fix about yourself. I don't mean make you more acceptable to your friends, I mean what will make you a better human being. Nobody's a saint but if you get your kicks hurling molotov cocktails at old ladies in power scooters you might wanna tone it down a bit, ya' know? It's cool to be dumb and stuff (I do it all the time) just know when it's too much and reign it in if necessary. Keep your friends in check and they'll respect you for it as well... well good ones will bad ones will continue to think that you are that special part of the female anatomy. If you know you're in shape, or just don't give a flying fruitcake then tell your friends. If they disagree, punch them, you're guys, it'll work. The same applies to the "having a life issue". If you think you have one, you have one. So long as you're not completely dissatisfied with whatever's going on in your life you should be fine, and if you are, do whatever you can to change it ASAP if it is within your power.

You are both right and wrong to expect more from your friends. My oldest "friend" has turned into a serious douchebag and for a while I wondered "what happened, why isn't he cool anymore? why doesn't he act like a friend?" and I guess the simplest answer is: People change.

While it probably wouldn't work to sit them down and tell them how you feel. Whenever you guys are messin' around and they say something out of line like "Dude, get a life" you just remind them that you have a girlfriend, a job, etc. then tell them to shut up but do it in a half sarcastic way that'll get them off your back, tell them what's up, and keep the mood somewhat light. You may want to try hangin' around with different people for a change too, friendships can pop up anywhere. Good luck to ya'

[lemur821]

It was you or them, man.

But anyway, sometimes people make jokes about you that aren't that funny, even your best friends. You can let them know, or let it go. Unless they decide it should be a running gag or something, I'd say just shake it off. If they really thought poorly of you, they wouldn't hang out with you.

[MJ5150]

Originally Posted by superfunk47

......I know I can't talk to them about it without being labeled as a certain part of the female anatomy.

Well....instead of those two friends thinking that, all 5,000,000,000 of us on the internet now think that.

Delete the thread before you get a fail pic posted in here.

-Mike

[superfunk47]

Originally Posted by MJ5150

Well....instead of those two friends thinking that, all 5,000,000,000 of us on the internet now think that.

Delete the thread before you get a fail pic posted in here.

-Mike

Oh, I know I've failed miserably, story of my day.

What you don't know is that I created this whole thread just to get some fresh fail pics, because they cheer me up.

...Or did I?

[KeithBMI]

[superfunk47]

Originally Posted by KeithBMI

Oh baby...right there...yeah, like that! Yeah! YEAH!!

Okay. Now I'm making that face.

[NJL]

sounds like you're a failure like us, drop by and get your number:

The Official Mark Wilson Fail Club

same with you MJ

[WarofAges]

some times things like that hurt, but i dish S%!t out all the time, and any time i get it back and it hurts me, i tell myself to suck it up and quit being a certain part of the female anatomy cuz if i dish it, i gotta be able to receive

[TheDarkReaver]

[Baryonyx]

Hanging around with drama kids is your problem. Drop these losers quickly, before your self esteem takes a further battering and you become the next Fassa!

[Selta]

Oh high school, how I don't miss thee.
Cut the ties and make some new friends elsewhere. Chances are you wont talk to or see these people much after you graduate anyway.

[Mark Latimour]

When did guys turn into chicks?

[PSPookie]

Originally Posted by Mark Latimour

When did guys turn into chicks?

I blame The Beatles

[lamarjones]

Did you seriously try to use the 'steady job' thing when you are in freakin high school?

I am inclined to believe them.

j/k man, you are thinking about it too much, but if you stop working out all together, it's gonna bite you later on. Also, the really great gigs like for you to be in better shape. If not for the band photo, then for carrying your gear.

[sarcastro83]

I've posted him before, and I feel as though I should do it again...



And didn't you just say that they were drama kids? I'll tell you one thing, hombre. A gaggle of drama kids may think you're a douche... but EVERYONE UNIVERSALLY AGREES that drama kids are the biggest douches of all.

I know you're young. But face it, in life there are going to be plenty more people where they're coming from, sharing in the opinion that you are in fact a douche. The real question is whether or not you're going to let that bother you...

[TheDarkReaver]

At least you arn't this guy.

[AlembicPlayer]

you play bass, have a girl and a job
they don't

what more needs to be said?
man up and kick some butt, you have the ammo.



--

[MJ5150]

Originally Posted by NJL

same with you MJ

Dang! I thought I wasn't a member of that club.

-Mike