Stress issues any help?

[KingCrimson]

Does anybody know ways to manage stress better? I'm an 18 year old kid with arguing parents (a hard headed mother with an exceptionally large grudge) , hectic school schedule and life schedule and diagnosed ADHD that makes me "getting" things slower then everybody else.

Its scaring me because i never wanted to turn out like my dad but its slowly happening, when i get REALLY angry i get tense and i feel like my neck is stiffing up, as well i can't think as straight and my eye twitches. Its really starting to seep into my life more then i'd like, and while when i'm outside with people i like or in a public place i'm pretty calm, laid back and down to earth when i'm at home or in my car and something really stresses me out i get angry....way too angry. As well i see my self and get really disappointed in myself, i'm known from most as very a very nice controlled guy.

I'm really tired of this physical feeling of tension, and i'm tired of losing it at certain things. I just feel like i get screwed over a bit too much and i really don't have patience with hard headed people.

Is there anything i can do when i'm in a stressful environment or have run on some really bad luck? Anything to control myself from doing anything stupid or angry?

Really i know that music are biking outside postive ways to take it away but i can't do that all the time and when i feel trapped its almost like i turn to a third person.

[username n/a]

Cry. A lot. Like seriously a lot.

[standupright]

tai chi and chi gong

[shackled]

See a counselor, man. Seriously.
Some of them suck, but there are some really good ones.
Just talking about it helps tremendously.

Good luck.

[i_got_a_mohawk]

- Talk to someone
- Go to the gym
- Avoid confrontation

[Jim Campbell]

Originally Posted by KingCrimson

Does anybody know ways to manage stress better? I'm an 18 year old kid with arguing parents (a hard headed mother with an exceptionally large grudge) , hectic school schedule and life schedule and diagnosed ADHD that makes me "getting" things slower then everybody else.

Its scaring me because i never wanted to turn out like my dad but its slowly happening, when i get REALLY angry i get tense and i feel like my neck is stiffing up, as well i can't think as straight and my eye twitches. Its really starting to seep into my life more then i'd like, and while when i'm outside with people i like or in a public place i'm pretty calm, laid back and down to earth when i'm at home or in my car and something really stresses me out i get angry....way too angry. As well i see my self and get really disappointed in myself, i'm known from most as very a very nice controlled guy.

I'm really tired of this physical feeling of tension, and i'm tired of losing it at certain things. I just feel like i get screwed over a bit too much and i really don't have patience with hard headed people.

Is there anything i can do when i'm in a stressful environment or have run on some really bad luck? Anything to control myself from doing anything stupid or angry?

Really i know that music are biking outside postive ways to take it away but i can't do that all the time and when i feel trapped its almost like i turn to a third person.

i used to hate going home too....the public library is a good place to study,perhaps a community club or church might let you practice there......

[Jim Nazium]

First of all, exercise is really good for you, both physically and emotionally. If you can do something every day, even if it's just take a walk around the block, it's really good.

Second, I've found that some simple meditation exercises can be very helpful. It's not BS and it's not religious or mystical, it's just about paying attention. There's a guy named Jon Kabat-Zinn who created a Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction program at a hospital, and the people who participated not only reported feeling less stressed, they also recovered faster from their illnesses.

So here's how to do it: sit with your back straight and your arms relaxed, however you are comfortable. Observe you next ten breaths. Don't try to breathe any particular way, just breathe normally and see what it feels like, smells like, sounds like, to breathe. After ten breaths, start checking your body for tension. Are your calves tense? Arms? Hands? Neck? If you find some muscles that are tense, see if you can relax them. Don't judge yourself, don't try to do it "perfectly", just see if you can find the tension and let it go. When your mind wanders, bring your attention back to your breath.

After you practice this body awareness for a while, you can try doing the same thing with your emotions. After looking at what is happening in your body, look at what is happening in your mind. Are you frustrated? Angry? Bored? Sleepy? See if you can observe and label your emotional state without getting caught up in it and without trying to change it. Recognize that emotional states come and go, like the weather.

I think that if you do this, some of the emotional states will lose some of their power. They won't stop arising, but they won't control you as much.

A further benefit, I believe, is that you are training your ability to focus your awareness, which will make you a better musician. You can focus your awareness on the chord changes, or the tone, or the pocket, and play better.

I would also encourage you to talk to a counselor and just see how it goes.

HTH, and good luck.