Top 5 Wierdest Last Words Heard From Your Former Roommate

[Ubersheist]

5. "Ubersheist - call my lawyer, and if my Mom asks, don't tell her I got arrested!"

4. "OH NO! Did you just take a shot of that? Oh no... That's not vodka... that's tripentamethanol 13 from the lab! I set it out to off-gas the cynide! OH NO OH NO!!!!"

3. "Seriously dude? My wife?!?! You knew we were married when you rented the room!! I can't even look at you!"

2. "So, sorry to tell you this, Uber, but I just got foreclosed on. You have the legal right to stay here for 90 days rent-free, then You can thank Obama for that..... Me? I gotta go, but maybe I'll see you one day in Mexico. Oh, and look out for people who'll want to rip out the copper!"

1. "Ubes... it's not that I mind that you have girls over. It's more that when you're wrapping things up... well, it's really, really high pitched and sound like a pelican being strangled... I mean... Who sounds like that when having sex? It just really creeps me out."

Ok, none of that stuff happened to me, although I did have a former landlord bail to Mexico after getting foreclosed on. I was just wondering if anyone had any good, funny former roommate stories. I've got a few... Anyone else?

[basscooker]

i once sent one down a flight of stairs backwards with his belongings following shortly behind...

[hdracer]

NO!!!

Put the gun down!!

[embellisher]

Originally Posted by Ubersheist

...
4. "OH NO! Did you just take a shot of that? Oh no... That's not vodka... that's tripentamethanol 13 from the lab! I set it out to off-gas the cynide! OH NO OH NO!!!!"
...

Reminds me of that scene from Up in Smoke!

[Ubersheist]

I had a nudist roommate once. I know this sounds too good to be true, but I swear it was. She was a 23-year old dental assistant, and stunning. The place was out in the country... We had a cement pond and 3/4 acres. She had a boyfriend, but it was great when I'd get home, and she's out sunning by the pool, or when she had a couple of her like minded friends over... GOOD TIMES.

I also had another roommate (also a stunning girl) who had a secret addiction to prescription pills. She was stealing from me for a while, and I had no idea.

[Topspin]

"Keep the fridge."
And so I kept it.

[SoonerMatt]

Almost got into a fight with a former roommate who was a recovering alcoholic and back on the wagon. He was a weirdo and wound up moving to Chicago to live with his pothead painter turned philosopher friend.

[arbitrary]

I had a roommate dealing drugs from his 3rd floor room while I lived in the basement. I was pretty unaware of this until he was held up in his room via gunpoint. I was asked to sign a lease later that night. I moved the next day.