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  #1  
Old 01-13-2013, 12:33 AM
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Ups And Downs

I assume we all feel down at times or others. From what I understand this is normal. After all, life can’t always be just ups as if it was so the very mere notion of ups or downs would not be required. That and the fact that everything that is life seems to work in cycles.

Accepting this, in a resilient way rather than a submissive one, we find tricks, activities, rituals, anything that make us go back up when we get a bit down. Be it just time in some cases. Those are often based on our interests, ideally passions.

This is why I find myself writing this. I have no passion(s) and have never had any. There are things I look forward to, things that entertain me, that I like, people that I love or did love. But a real passion ? Something that gets me striving day and night, that keeps me going just by the thought of it ? I sadly find none. Don’t get me wrong, as I’ve said I like what I do, and like many things. I just find it sad to have nothing I’m passionate about. Which is bland and I could use the extra motivation.

The other thing that made me write this is that I find my " downs " to be very similar lately. Kind of like the same feeling repeating itself at different time intervals. It’s really not that frequent, but still, there’s an odd feeling to it. Now and then, I get a very lonely feeling that leads to some kind of " negative introspection ", a self-confidence bashing of some sorts if you prefer. I usually sleep it off as most of the times this happens late at night when I should probably be sleeping, when my thoughts are close to rambling than a structured train of thought.

Brushing it off always seemed like the way to go about it. Nobody likes a negative person. Which is perhaps why I don’t find myself speaking about these sorts of things and try to be cheerful. That and the fact that I am in fact sort of lonely and lost (read: broke-up with) the person which used to be my confident. I don’t have many good friends and they all live some hundreds of miles away. And since I’ve arrived in this town I can’t really say I’ve made much acquaintances or actually met people.

Anyways, I just felt like putting this out there, it feels good to vent. I should probably go sleep now and go out more often and start exercising again.
I somehow have a feeling I'll regret this thread.
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  #2  
Old 01-13-2013, 04:00 AM
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Why would you regret starting this thread? I'm sure there are plenty of people who can sympathise with you.

Do you think you could be passionate about something, but just don't know what "it" is? Or do you feel like maybe having true passion for anything is just beyond your reach?

You are a smart guy, I think you know what you need to do.

Good luck!
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  #3  
Old 01-13-2013, 06:00 AM
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You need a pet to cheer you up.

  #4  
Old 01-13-2013, 06:41 AM
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You sound pretty normal .

I assume you just moved to a new place far away from "home"?

I've been there and it can suck .

And that makes finding a passion even harder.

No advise ,but I can sympathize.

Good luck ,keep your head up
  #5  
Old 01-13-2013, 07:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gazman View Post

Do you think you could be passionate about something, but just don't know what "it" is? Or do you feel like maybe having true passion for anything is just beyond your reach?
I Have no idea.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Indiana Mike View Post
You sound pretty normal .

I assume you just moved to a new place far away from "home"?

I've been there and it can suck .

And that makes finding a passion even harder.

No advise ,but I can sympathize.

Good luck ,keep your head up
Yeah, just moved out a few months ago. I shouldn't of. It was mainly for a girl.
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I like to pretend I'm a beautiful princess with a pretty ballerina outfit dancing through my pink castle.

Last edited by Ziltoid : 01-13-2013 at 07:58 AM.
  #6  
Old 01-13-2013, 09:04 AM
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At your age, I went through much the same to be honest. Ups and downs like crazy.
What helped me was an adventure.. it sounds nuts but I took what money I had left for college, boarded a plane and spent time in Eastern Europe. This was right after the big changes there. *Phenomenal* time in my life that I'll never forget. It ripped me away from the boring plainness of my life and opened my eyes to a good many things. Now, I'm not at all suggesting that that's what you should do Dom, but what I do suspect is that maybe you're reached that point as well where you need a change in your routine. A trip/adventure, a new change of scenery, a new group of friends....I'm not sure what exactly, but sometimes "change" can be a very very good thing. Just something to consider...?
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meh
  #7  
Old 01-13-2013, 11:13 AM
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I'm the same way, I just throw myself into something I find interesting. I've been though writing fan fiction, exploring my sexuality, playing bass, blogging, playing stupid Papa Louie games, discovering new musical eras (currently on a 60s kick), the list goes on and on. Use your interests as a spring board, I honestly think passions are overrated.
  #8  
Old 01-13-2013, 11:31 AM
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Exercise is a great way to stay more on the Up side of the equation. It releases endorphins and makes everything you do seem better for hours afterward. I was mountain Biking every other day all summer and into the fall. Then it got kind of cold out and I stopped. I can feel a big difference mentally with out the exercise. So Much that I will probably join the local Gym. Or I may just start riding on the street.
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  #9  
Old 01-13-2013, 02:03 PM
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Depression hit me pretty hard about a year ago after I moved back to the town I grew up in. The four years leading up to the move were rough (miscarriage, depressed wife, new baby who has Down syndrome, baby had hear surgery when he was 6 months old when I was halfway through my master's degree, another heart surgery about 18 months ago, new job). People wondered how I hadn't been depressed before.

I'm on some meds, started playing bass, started exercising more and got to know my wife again. I'm better but still not quite my self. I think it takes some time.
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  #10  
Old 01-13-2013, 05:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Relic View Post
At your age, I went through much the same to be honest. Ups and downs like crazy.
What helped me was an adventure.. it sounds nuts but I took what money I had left for college, boarded a plane and spent time in Eastern Europe. This was right after the big changes there. *Phenomenal* time in my life that I'll never forget. It ripped me away from the boring plainness of my life and opened my eyes to a good many things. Now, I'm not at all suggesting that that's what you should do Dom, but what I do suspect is that maybe you're reached that point as well where you need a change in your routine. A trip/adventure, a new change of scenery, a new group of friends....I'm not sure what exactly, but sometimes "change" can be a very very good thing. Just something to consider...?
So basically what you are saying is "You don't like it? Change it!" A trip would be nice, I've been longing for certain destinations for quite some time.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Casting Thunder View Post
I'm the same way, I just throw myself into something I find interesting. I've been though writing fan fiction, exploring my sexuality, playing bass, blogging, playing stupid Papa Louie games, discovering new musical eras (currently on a 60s kick), the list goes on and on. Use your interests as a spring board, I honestly think passions are overrated.
I still hope to find one, seems neat to have haha.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Illini10 View Post
Depression hit me pretty hard about a year ago after I moved back to the town I grew up in. The four years leading up to the move were rough (miscarriage, depressed wife, new baby who has Down syndrome, baby had hear surgery when he was 6 months old when I was halfway through my master's degree, another heart surgery about 18 months ago, new job). People wondered how I hadn't been depressed before.

I'm on some meds, started playing bass, started exercising more and got to know my wife again. I'm better but still not quite my self. I think it takes some time.
Hang in there buddy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCbassist View Post
Exercise is a great way to stay more on the Up side of the equation. It releases endorphins and makes everything you do seem better for hours afterward. I was mountain Biking every other day all summer and into the fall. Then it got kind of cold out and I stopped. I can feel a big difference mentally with out the exercise. So Much that I will probably join the local Gym. Or I may just start riding on the street.
Yeah, that's pretty much why I said I should start exercising again.
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Originally Posted by capnsandwich View Post
I like to pretend I'm a beautiful princess with a pretty ballerina outfit dancing through my pink castle.
  #11  
Old 01-13-2013, 07:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ziltoid View Post
I assume we all feel down at times or others. From what I understand this is normal. After all, life can’t always be just ups as if it was so the very mere notion of ups or downs would not be required. That and the fact that everything that is life seems to work in cycles.

Accepting this, in a resilient way rather than a submissive one, we find tricks, activities, rituals, anything that make us go back up when we get a bit down. Be it just time in some cases. Those are often based on our interests, ideally passions.

This is why I find myself writing this. I have no passion(s) and have never had any. There are things I look forward to, things that entertain me, that I like, people that I love or did love. But a real passion ? Something that gets me striving day and night, that keeps me going just by the thought of it ? I sadly find none. Don’t get me wrong, as I’ve said I like what I do, and like many things. I just find it sad to have nothing I’m passionate about. Which is bland and I could use the extra motivation.

The other thing that made me write this is that I find my " downs " to be very similar lately. Kind of like the same feeling repeating itself at different time intervals. It’s really not that frequent, but still, there’s an odd feeling to it. Now and then, I get a very lonely feeling that leads to some kind of " negative introspection ", a self-confidence bashing of some sorts if you prefer. I usually sleep it off as most of the times this happens late at night when I should probably be sleeping, when my thoughts are close to rambling than a structured train of thought.

Brushing it off always seemed like the way to go about it. Nobody likes a negative person. Which is perhaps why I don’t find myself speaking about these sorts of things and try to be cheerful. That and the fact that I am in fact sort of lonely and lost (read: broke-up with) the person which used to be my confident. I don’t have many good friends and they all live some hundreds of miles away. And since I’ve arrived in this town I can’t really say I’ve made much acquaintances or actually met people.

Anyways, I just felt like putting this out there, it feels good to vent. I should probably go sleep now and go out more often and start exercising again.
I somehow have a feeling I'll regret this thread.
Well I find it odd talking about this; I've had passions. Music was a big one. It got crushed over years...basically now I've made it easier on myself. My new passion is simply 'progress'. Understanding the world, going back to school, SOUND DESIGN if I feel like it. Basically finding enough distraction in life to just either stop thinking about problems or to make myself 'happy' thinking about the next big thing.
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  #12  
Old 01-14-2013, 06:07 AM
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I never know what causes me being down. It comes at the most inopportune times. I was heading home from band practice several weeks ago and was feeling particularly low so I called the fiance just to talk to her. let her know how I was feeling. Stopped at taco bell on the way home ate some tacos in bed and felt marvelous. Is food my comfort or did I have low blood sugar?
  #13  
Old 01-14-2013, 06:18 AM
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I think not having anything you are genuinely passionate about puts you in with most people.

The whole "find your passion" thing is a pretty new human pursuit, and I think it's mostly pushed by people trying to sell something.

Being emotionally down all the time, otoh, might be something to talk over with a doctor.
  #14  
Old 01-14-2013, 09:36 AM
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Travel. Do it know while you're not tied down. I recommend Asia. Perhaps, set up a job while you're there. Teaching English, for example. Experience a new culture. I recommend Asia because the chicks are smoking hot.
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  #15  
Old 01-14-2013, 09:45 AM
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Although i don't think travel will magically sort everything, since your life will still be mostly the same when you come back, it will definitely help you discover new things, and put things into perspective.

Two years ago ( i was 26) i spent 6 weeks traveling across south america, i really enjoyed it, and it actually made me discover Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, which is now my biggest passion, and has relegated bass playing to a simple Job and a way to pay the bills.
I now train everyday for two hours and i am in love with it.

One of my best mates is now in Vietnam, he was very low before he left and had no idea what to do with his life and was running in circles. He is also a musician and was frustrated as music led him nowhere.
He is now doing a scuba diver course to become an instructor or work as a pro diver.
  #16  
Old 01-14-2013, 10:55 AM
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Originally Posted by MakiSupaStar View Post
Travel. Do it know while you're not tied down. I recommend Asia. Perhaps, set up a job while you're there. Teaching English, for example. Experience a new culture. I recommend Asia because the chicks are smoking hot.
Yea. Or time travel
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  #17  
Old 01-14-2013, 11:08 AM
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Traveling (or time traveling for that matter) is not really an option now tho. I'm not strapped for cash but I do not have that kind of excess either. Also that I'm beginning my last semester of my Ba. and beginning a master next fall. Hopefully I'll get the SSHRC grant/scholarship I applied for but even then I don't really see how I could afford to travel. It's not just the cost of the trip itself, it's also the work hours lost while I'm there. The only time I could travel is during the summer when, as a student, you're supposed to be on squirrel mode for the upcoming year.
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I like to pretend I'm a beautiful princess with a pretty ballerina outfit dancing through my pink castle.
  #18  
Old 01-14-2013, 11:14 AM
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Yea. Or time travel
Time will be the next component to my teleportation device. Would you like to contribute to my kickstarter?
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  #19  
Old 01-14-2013, 11:20 AM
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I vote for travel - although I recommend Europe because there's a lot of beer you can get there that you can't get here. Once you've had beer in Europe, you'll never taste beer the same way again, IMHO.
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...and it is EFFING MAGICAL like 2-headed robot unicorn bagpipe bands fighting terminator/transformer mermaids w/battle axes on acid. Everyone should have that in their life.
  #20  
Old 01-14-2013, 12:31 PM
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Time will be the next component to my teleportation device. Would you like to contribute to my kickstarter?
Nah I beat you to it. I'm collecting the old fashioned way. Fliers
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