What to do for surprise birthday party

[disenchant]

My husband is turning 30 (!) this year and I wanted to throw him a surprise party. NOT an "over the hill" type of party, just a party with friends.

Problem is--what to do? We have some friends who have families with kids. His best friend is from his old band and he still tours and does the party scene. Two of his other friends are single males. Then there's his mom and stepdad and dad--do we invite them? Then there's his daughter, do we plan it so she can attend?

I feel like a party at our house wouldn't work. We have a small condo and I keep imagining his friends dying of boredom! None of them are from the same "group" so it's not like we all hang out together. His band friends are going to want to drink. His friends with families are going to want to talk about kids. ACK!

Is a restaurant party lame? I'm actually just thinking of having everyone meet up at Dave n Busters. That's one of those places that has dinner, games and alcohol both.

Almost all y'all are guys. What would YOU like? BESIDES chicken and raincoats. I already have that covered!

[leftyderek]

It's always a headache to try to organize a party that accommodates several 'groups'.

Chicken and raincoats aside, I think a restaurant party for the 'general public', and then as the crowd thins out, maybe an after-party sort of thing somewhere else later into the night with the closer/closest ones would be a good idea. Either a rowdy crescendo or a quiet couple last drinks at your condo...

Is it possible to have his band mates to play a couple songs for (and then maybe with) him at the restaurant?

Also, in my own experience, stepdads and dads don't mix too well. Unless they are very, very civilized people.

(And Whee! 30!)

[bassteban]

Paging *he who is not proud*

[bassybill]

If you're going to go for it, just invite everyone you can think of. Don't worry about it being a disparate crowd. Birthday parties are often like that and people sort themselves out just fine, in my experience.

Email invites are fine for those who are online, but it's nice to put together and attach an image showing the birthday person, venue and other details, a personal message, etc. Make it visually appealing and don't forget details about eating/drinking arrangements and the RSVP. Print it out and mail it to any dinosaurs without email addresses.

Hire a pleasant, appropriately sized room for a date and time that will suit as many people as possible in your party. For food, I'd just go for a finger buffet rather than a sit-down meal, it's less formal and people can eat what they want when they want. Make sure you cater for veggies if you have any coming along.

You'll need some music - recorded is fine, but at musicians' parties I'd normally expect some sort of live stuff, even if it's just a jam session. Watch the volume, you don't want people leaving with their ears bleeding. Or maybe you do.

Encourage folks to take lots of pics (disposable cameras can help here) and get at least some of it videod by someone who can operate a camera with basic competence.

Don't lose sleep over it, just get together and have fun. We had a surprise 80th birthday party for my Dad this year, tons of folks of all ages were there and they all had a blast. It was a massive job for me to prepare for it, but that was mainly the musical aspect. The invites and basic party organisation were fairly painless.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpIhIjnv428

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTwMOuZw14I

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1jVRv3W3mg

[Infidelity]

When people ask me this question this song always comes to my mind..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRqdXqk4Q_c

[JacoLesFlea]

Do you have a Chuck E. Cheeze near you? Those are always fun for surprise bdays. There is always fun for one and all!!!!

[ZachOrem]

Allow me to cast my humble vote for lazer tag. There is not a man alive who doesn't have epilepsy that won't enjoy a day full of videogames with real life resolution.

After that, take him out for a steak or something. Us boys get a strange, loving feeling when our girls do awesome/nerdy things for us. That being said, I'm sure whatever you decide on will conquer your man's mind and fill him with good thoughts for weeks to come, such is love.

[Bard2dbone]

For my 30th, my wife threw a surprise funeral at my parents house. We went to my folks house for dinner. They found a reason for us to be outside at a certain time. A procession of cars came slowly up the street with their lights on. All my friends got out wearing black and came up and hugged my wife and my mom and acted like they didn't see me.

It soon turned into a pretty good, normal party. But the first part was memorably wierd.

[Phalex]

My wife got me GOOD on my 40th. She sent me on a wild goose chase to the other side of the state with a friend of hers to pick up a bigass kitchen appliance with my pick up truck, and when I got back there was pretty much everyone I knew in my garage along with a keg, and lots of munchies! (Half burnt greasy chicken wings at 3:30 in the morning completely got rid of any hangover I may have had. AMAZING!)

I thought the best thing (Besides every other person that showed up handing me a badly wrapped bottle of liquor) was the number of people from different phases of my life. There were old band mates from years back, present band mates, my best friend from when I was 10 years old or so, highschool friends.....

I was no damn good for company or conversation because I was drinking all the badly wrapped bottles of liquor with a constantly changing stream of people at the end of my driveway.

Make it a big one, and give him a sucky mundane time consuming chore so you can get things ready. Probably the condo is a no go, but is there a party house there?