Why do girls spill their guts to me?

chicago_mike · #1 09-09-2010, 11:47 PM

Last I checked I dont have a neon sign on my face saying Im the proverbial shoulder to cry on...

How did this happen in the first place, and how do I stop it?

Any other guys / gals around here the proverbial shoulder?

Get your number here.

A-Step-Towards · #2 09-09-2010, 11:49 PM

Do they think your attracted to the same sex they are?

chicago_mike · #3 09-09-2010, 11:53 PM

No,,thats not it...I dont think..

BurningSkies · #4 09-09-2010, 11:55 PM

Ugly, therefore non-threatening?

sloasdaylight · #5 09-10-2010, 12:01 AM

Dunno, don't care.

**line6man** · #6 09-10-2010, 12:03 AM

Women don't talk to me.

MakiSupaStar · #7 09-10-2010, 12:06 AM

Because you present yourself as a friend when you actually listen to them.

OOZMAN · #8 09-10-2010, 12:11 AM

You're the nice guy and they feel that you're their friend not just for sex... so they befriend you. Don't worry, they'll realise how awesome and there for them you are and they'll all fall in love with you one day. The movies don't make that bit up, y'know...

Good luck... and remember, only listen to Maki if you want to get in their pants.

jks

Stumbo · #9 09-10-2010, 12:46 AM

You can always take it to the next level and see what happens. :0

f'nar f'nar · #10 09-10-2010, 01:39 AM

My friend, I suggest you take a look at the definition of the Friend Zone on Encyclopedia Dramatica

Edit: for reference it happens to me too haha

drteeth · #11 09-10-2010, 04:13 AM

Friend zoned. It happens to me way too often.

Jim Nazium · #12 09-10-2010, 04:38 AM

Yup, friend zone. Next time one of them cries on your shoulder, try copping a feel.

JacoLesFlea · #13 09-10-2010, 05:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MakiSupaStar

Because you present yourself as a friend when you actually listen to them.

So much said in such few words...this is exactally what it is.

**jmattbassplaya** · #14 09-10-2010, 06:01 AM

Nothing wrong with what has happened. In fact you can fix it. Be nice to the girls and remain a good guy, but don't always be there, and show interest in other girls, and ask advice on other girls from them. Butter these girls up by saying little sweet things towards to other girl you are supposedly 'pursuing' but don't over do it, and always, always walk away or hang up on one of these other 'friends' on your own time. You keep control and be a man in these conversations. After a week or so just cut these girls off, but if you see them in person say hi and act excited to see them, but way too busy to stop and talk. Give it a month or two and they'll be back and more often than not they'll be interested in you so take advantage of that. Of course this method takes some time but it keeps a lot of girls on the backburner and can actually give you some real girl friends if you want it to too.

jp58 · #15 09-10-2010, 06:18 AM

Because you have become their emotional tampon. Congrats.

hover · #16 09-10-2010, 06:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jp58

Because you have become their emotional tampon. Congrats.

All of the above. Reign that shoulder back a little.

Nitzleplick · #17 09-10-2010, 06:44 AM

Women are attracted to what they cannot have, and they no longer want what they can have.

To explain, 'bad boys' represent the gritty, testosterone filled man's man they are attracted to, these bad boys do not pay attention to their women and that makes them want them even more. Why is that?

When a man doesn't pay attention to woman, woman subconsciously try to get the attention of the man. Once a man gets to the point of doting on a woman they cease being her lover and subconsciously she becomes turned off. Now marriage does work IF you inject love and romance into the relationship. Without that there are only two things that will keep a woman with a man. Money or Bad Boy mentality.

This is why many woman cannot get away from abusive boyfriends, because they crave that negative attention, and if you think i'm just blowing hot air there are many studies you could google on woman and abusive relationships.

You are her friend not her lover for two reasons:

1. You are too caring towards her and not what you SHOULD be, a independant but romantic man's man.

2. You went in to help her as a friend, that was probably your first thought too. That it would branch out into a real relationship, men all over the world get into the trap of wishing their friendship was something more. Thats why the phrase "Let's just be friends" is a Coffin Nail to a man's ears.

You must treat her right, buy her flowers etc. never cheat but never get involved in small talk, and baby her as little as possible, this is what her girlfriends are for.

Thunderscreech · #18 09-10-2010, 07:52 AM

It happens to me sometimes. I employ the "in-one-ear-out-the-other-non-committal-neutral-zone". Why? you never know what will happen when she stops being mad:

GF: "My mom is being a *****"
Me (the foolish, well-meaning boyfriend who really didn't want to be interrupted from his game of Age of Empires 3 and is nothing more than an innocent bystander in this case): "yeah, your mom can be a ***** sometimes..."
GF: "You just called my mom a *****!?"

as you can see, some minefields are best left uncrossed...

Infidelity · #19 09-10-2010, 08:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thunderscreech

It happens to me sometimes. I employ the "in-one-ear-out-the-other-non-committal-neutral-zone". Why? you never know what will happen when she stops being mad:

GF: "My mom is being a *****"
Me (the foolish, well-meaning boyfriend who really didn't want to be interrupted from his game of Age of Empires 3 and is nothing more than an innocent bystander in this case): "yeah, your mom can be a ***** sometimes..."
GF: "You just called my mom a *****!?"

as you can see, some minefields are best left uncrossed...

Rocker949 · #20 09-10-2010, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nitzleplick

Women are attracted to what they cannot have, and they no longer want what they can have.

To explain, 'bad boys' represent the gritty, testosterone filled man's man they are attracted to, these bad boys do not pay attention to their women and that makes them want them even more. Why is that?

When a man doesn't pay attention to woman, woman subconsciously try to get the attention of the man. Once a man gets to the point of doting on a woman they cease being her lover and subconsciously she becomes turned off. Now marriage does work IF you inject love and romance into the relationship. Without that there are only two things that will keep a woman with a man. Money or Bad Boy mentality.

This is why many woman cannot get away from abusive boyfriends, because they crave that negative attention, and if you think i'm just blowing hot air there are many studies you could google on woman and abusive relationships.

You are her friend not her lover for two reasons:

1. You are too caring towards her and not what you SHOULD be, a independant but romantic man's man.

2. You went in to help her as a friend, that was probably your first thought too. That it would branch out into a real relationship, men all over the world get into the trap of wishing their friendship was something more. Thats why the phrase "Let's just be friends" is a Coffin Nail to a man's ears.

You must treat her right, buy her flowers etc. never cheat but never get involved in small talk, and baby her as little as possible, this is what her girlfriends are for.

I don't know where you got your Ph.D. in Understanding Women from, but you definitely know your stuff.